Mar 30, 2009 - 12:58 am
My brother recently had a small, Grade IV Glioblastoma removed from between the two lobes of his brain. There is another, larger but lower grade tumor left which is inoperable (I don't know if it's the same type, my mind is slow to catch up because of the shock). I am having a really difficult time with this and am trying to reach out, because even though I like to think I am strong, I really don't deal well with stress. I am so afraid of alienating my husband and kids. My husband told me it would be a good idea to find a support group because even though he loves and supports me, he doesn't know how to help--his family is not as close as mine, and we have very different coping mechanisms. He said he was afraid he would lose patience if I was not "okay" after about the length of time he felt he would need in this situation. That time period turned out to be three weeks, and now we've hit a rough patch. I have tried so hard to keep doing the things I've always done. I think that when he tries to be cute and flirty he's only trying to help, and to put me in a good mood, but really it just turns me off and makes me feel (even though I know deep down that it's not true) like he's being insensitive. Now he's getting increasingly frustrated, but at the same time, because I am trying so hard to the next level of this thing, he seems to think that I'm doing well again...but I am definitely not where I need to be in order to be strong for him and the kids--and most importantly, my brother. We live in a town of about 60,000 in a mostly rural area, and the live support groups I've been able to find only meet once a month. There's a big black hole that seems to be drawing me in, and I don't know where to turn for help getting out of it. How do I pick myself up from this in order to get to a better place?