Mar 26, 2009 - 10:41 pm
2 1/2 months ago my daughter was a typical 18 year old stretching her wings and her independence, going to school, working and partying with her friends. Now she's waiting for her hair to fall out, her nausea to ease up and the clots in her arms to go away. She craves strawberries but she's neutopaenic so that's not an option. She calls Lovenox LOATHE-enox - it's the worst part of her treatment - at this point because it hurts so much. She's been ill since mid-January. And the doctors kept telling us she had Mono - a bad case of it. I never believed that was all it was. They told us it wasn't Leukemia so when they finally found out what she has - after 2 bone marrow biopsies - I was SHOCKED! I had stopped worrying about cancer a month ago. I feel helpless. So surreal! She's so strong and I am trying to be but the tears sneak up on me. Getting better at stopping them before they pour down my face - she was diagnosed with APL - a form of Leukemia that isn't seen terribly often - on March 16th. We've been in the hospital since then and I'm trying to find someone to talk to. This is such a lonely journey - fortunately she has so many wonderful friends! I have selfish thoughts that I feel so guilty about - it goes on and on and on!