My Mom´s time has come

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lizper
lizper Member Posts: 199
edited March 2014 in Ovarian Cancer #1
I`m so so sad, frustrated, don´t have words to express the pain I feel right now. My Mom has been in the hospital the past 14 days with an intestinal blockage due to the cancer implants. She has a tube from her nose to her stomach to drain the fluid accumulated, Her abdomen is bloated like if she were 5 months pregnant. Since February 3rd she hasnñt had anything to drink or eat. She is being mantained with IV nutrition. She has been vomiting more and more and know she vomits the pupe that is stuck in the intestin. It hurts so much to see her suffering. The Dr. tries ine chemo a weeks ago (Carbo again) but only helped 20% which was not enough, there thinking in not giving her anymore. I`m so sad, I just had my baby girl.. she is 3 months old. I though the Lord was going to give me some more time. Time for her to enjoy her and my 2 year old. Please pray for her. Liz

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  • BonnieR
    BonnieR Member Posts: 1,526 Member
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    Praying
    Dearest Liz, my heart is just breaking for you, I wish I lived closer so I could hold you and hug you, I pray you have someone close that has a shoulder you can cry on. I am so glad your mom hung for the birth of your little one. What a gift for you all.

    This is such a horrible unfair disease, I know Hospice will be my choice at the end. It is hard for us to watch our loved one's body shut down, I lost my mom 11 months after I was diagnosed with Ovarian cancer. But, as hard as it to see them leave, please rest assured in knowing God is waiting for her. Yes no tears for her beyond the gate. It is okay to tell her how much you love her, how much you'll miss her and if you need to lay your head in her lap and weep. I think of dying as a birthing and it really helps me, it is a birthing from this life to eternity. Our Spirit takes flight and pain forgot, no worries to cloud the mind, as we find our Earth journey ends.

    God's peace be with you. Love Hug N Prayers Bonnie
  • mopar
    mopar Member Posts: 1,972 Member
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    DEAREST LIZ
    I too have been there when my mother was dealing with cancer, and saw how it slowly took her away from us. Sometimes the pain is unbearable. I've always heard people refer to a 'broken heart', but mine literally hurt so. It is a process that we must go through, as much as it is a journey that your Mom is going through. I know that the only way I was able to get through it was to rely on the Lord to walk with me and even sometimes carry me along.

    As Bonnie, I also wish I could be there to give you hugs and support. So the best I can do across the miles is to tell you that I will pray for your Mom and you for strength to endure. And that He may give her the grace and strength to walk a few more miles with this horrible disease. As for you, I remember your posts these last couple of years and how happy you were that your Mom was able to experience her grandchild, and now another! Becoming a first-time Grandmother on 1/26/09, I know how it has made me feel, and I know your Mom has enjoyed seeing her daugther bring children into this world. Babies have a way of giving us continued hope, and renewing the spirit inside of us. So, when you are able, try to focus on the wonderful memories that you have, and know that in time your hurting heart will be healed. Though you will always miss your Mom, she will continue to live in spirit in your heart and the hearts of your children.

    Sending lots of hugs and prayers,
    Monika
  • pjba11
    pjba11 Member Posts: 188
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    mopar said:

    DEAREST LIZ
    I too have been there when my mother was dealing with cancer, and saw how it slowly took her away from us. Sometimes the pain is unbearable. I've always heard people refer to a 'broken heart', but mine literally hurt so. It is a process that we must go through, as much as it is a journey that your Mom is going through. I know that the only way I was able to get through it was to rely on the Lord to walk with me and even sometimes carry me along.

    As Bonnie, I also wish I could be there to give you hugs and support. So the best I can do across the miles is to tell you that I will pray for your Mom and you for strength to endure. And that He may give her the grace and strength to walk a few more miles with this horrible disease. As for you, I remember your posts these last couple of years and how happy you were that your Mom was able to experience her grandchild, and now another! Becoming a first-time Grandmother on 1/26/09, I know how it has made me feel, and I know your Mom has enjoyed seeing her daugther bring children into this world. Babies have a way of giving us continued hope, and renewing the spirit inside of us. So, when you are able, try to focus on the wonderful memories that you have, and know that in time your hurting heart will be healed. Though you will always miss your Mom, she will continue to live in spirit in your heart and the hearts of your children.

    Sending lots of hugs and prayers,
    Monika

    So very sorry
    So very sorry for your moms cancer and pain. I too lost my mom to cancer. She suffered so very much in the hospital. I stood by her bed so mad at God. I looked at the sky and I shouted you won't take her and you won't let us keep her... what are we supposed to do? She suffered so much and and so long like your mom is. My heart was closed to God for this for a very long time. I now realize that it was not a good thing and it made her passing almost unbearable. Please know in your heart that a feast of welcome in heaven is being prepared for your mom now. I pray for you, your family and your mom. Peggy
  • saundra
    saundra Member Posts: 1,370 Member
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    Sympathy to you
    Dear Liz, We are all praying for you and your mom. She has been a fighter, hasn't she? You too, so you must have her fighting genes!!! They will serve you well in the future and you will always remember where you got these genes and all of the other traits that she passed on to you. The circle of life is more amazing to me each day.

    I do pray the the doctors will be compassionate and see that she is given pain medication and kept comfortable and the suffering will end.

    You can be grateful that God allowed your mother to see her two grandchildren. That must have made her feel happy.

    We are reaching out with Hugs and Prayers, dear Liz, Saundra
  • Cindy54
    Cindy54 Member Posts: 452
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    Your Mom
    Liz..I also wish I could be there to give you a hug. I also lost my Mom to ovarian two years ago. Her last few days were spent suffering from an intestinal blockage also. I did not have Hospice in, as the doctor was not sure just how long Mom would be here. She lived 18 months beyond anyone's expectations. During her last days she was vomiting that gunk also. It had got to the point where she had no more strength, so I would lift her forward and out it would come.I had asked her many times during her last days if she wanted me to call someone or maybe I should get some help, but she refused. I think she knew that there was nothing anyone could do and she just wanted to go at home, not in a hospital. As hard as it was for me to let her go, after she passed and I really had a good look at her poor body, from all the suffering she had done, I was thankful that she was no longer in pain. Yes I missed her, as I do to this day. But she barely weighed 90 pounds at the end.So much suffering. My heart aches for you Liz, because it is never easy to stand by and feel so helpless. I still go over the what if's, maybe's and should have's. But at the end there was just nothing further I could do for her.Sometimes it's not the length of time we have with someone, it's what we do in that time we have with them. During my Mom's last night on earth, I was giving her sips of her favorite soda, tylenol, and just trying to keep her comfortable.And the last words she ever spoke were to tell me that she loved me. So I have that when things start getting to me. I will pray for you and your Mom, that God's will be done. May He continue to give you a strength that you never knew you have.
  • groundeffect
    groundeffect Member Posts: 639 Member
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    My sympathy
    Liz,

    I just lost my mother on Jan. 8th, after she had spent almost two years barely existing in care facilities. Something went haywire in her mind (most likely small strokes), and she was not capable of living on her own. Her passing was long in coming, as we expected her to die shortly after her first episode.

    I can't imagine how you are able to cope with your mom's illness. I hope that you are getting the support you need. Your little ones really need their mom, too.

    I'll pray for your mom, and hope that you and she will find peace.

    Sue
  • marcy
    marcy Member Posts: 58
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    My sympathy
    Liz,

    I just lost my mother on Jan. 8th, after she had spent almost two years barely existing in care facilities. Something went haywire in her mind (most likely small strokes), and she was not capable of living on her own. Her passing was long in coming, as we expected her to die shortly after her first episode.

    I can't imagine how you are able to cope with your mom's illness. I hope that you are getting the support you need. Your little ones really need their mom, too.

    I'll pray for your mom, and hope that you and she will find peace.

    Sue

    God Bless you and your family
    Liz,
    I am so sorry for what you are going through. It's so hard to watch a parent suffer. I lost my dad to cancer. It is one of the hardest things I've ever had to witness. However, I knew that he would soon be in a better place with no suffering at all. That is what kept me strong.
    I too wish I could give you a big hug and comfort you. God Bless you, your mom and your family. My prayers are with you. I pray you can be strong and know God is with you and your mom. God Bless.
  • green50
    green50 Member Posts: 312
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    marcy said:

    God Bless you and your family
    Liz,
    I am so sorry for what you are going through. It's so hard to watch a parent suffer. I lost my dad to cancer. It is one of the hardest things I've ever had to witness. However, I knew that he would soon be in a better place with no suffering at all. That is what kept me strong.
    I too wish I could give you a big hug and comfort you. God Bless you, your mom and your family. My prayers are with you. I pray you can be strong and know God is with you and your mom. God Bless.

    God Give You, Your Mom and Family Comfort
    I can also remember the words "not too much longer" for my husband who had lung cancer. I too have ovarian cancer. But I felt my strength as I know God put my husbands wings on and NO more suffering. Its hard because you miss them but relief for they have no more suffering or pain. And I have tried to explain to people I still feel my husband's pressense. They look at me funny but I still feel him. And I remember how he made me laugh. It hurts and I won't lie to you. But somehow as time passes you realize no more pain for that person and they are with God. I agree with Bonnie and the rest after here is better and no more suffering. I love life but God made life and can you emagine how beautiful heaven Must be? I pray for you, your mom and family to get comforted and wish I too could give you a big hug and comfort.
    Prayers and Hugs
    Sandy
  • Dreamdove
    Dreamdove Member Posts: 175 Member
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    green50 said:

    God Give You, Your Mom and Family Comfort
    I can also remember the words "not too much longer" for my husband who had lung cancer. I too have ovarian cancer. But I felt my strength as I know God put my husbands wings on and NO more suffering. Its hard because you miss them but relief for they have no more suffering or pain. And I have tried to explain to people I still feel my husband's pressense. They look at me funny but I still feel him. And I remember how he made me laugh. It hurts and I won't lie to you. But somehow as time passes you realize no more pain for that person and they are with God. I agree with Bonnie and the rest after here is better and no more suffering. I love life but God made life and can you emagine how beautiful heaven Must be? I pray for you, your mom and family to get comforted and wish I too could give you a big hug and comfort.
    Prayers and Hugs
    Sandy

    Love doesn't stop
    green, I'm pretty sure your husband is around you. Don't let anyone tell you that is your imagination because you need him so much. He still loves you and cares about you--that hasn't changed. He is just in spirit form in a different dimension than ours where there is no suffering and it is very beautiful. You KNOW that. Take care.
  • green50
    green50 Member Posts: 312
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    Dreamdove said:

    Love doesn't stop
    green, I'm pretty sure your husband is around you. Don't let anyone tell you that is your imagination because you need him so much. He still loves you and cares about you--that hasn't changed. He is just in spirit form in a different dimension than ours where there is no suffering and it is very beautiful. You KNOW that. Take care.

    Thank You Dreamdove
    Thank you it makes me feel better knowing someone else understands. I guess I was a little skeptic until a few things have happened to me that sounds far fetched but I believe its real. Shortly after he passed I was sleeping and felt him behind me holding me when sleeping i actually woke up and didn't see him but felt him and it made me feel better believing he was there. But thank you so much for you support with this.
    Prayers and Hugs
    Sandy
  • marcy
    marcy Member Posts: 58
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    green50 said:

    Thank You Dreamdove
    Thank you it makes me feel better knowing someone else understands. I guess I was a little skeptic until a few things have happened to me that sounds far fetched but I believe its real. Shortly after he passed I was sleeping and felt him behind me holding me when sleeping i actually woke up and didn't see him but felt him and it made me feel better believing he was there. But thank you so much for you support with this.
    Prayers and Hugs
    Sandy

    Green50 and others who
    Green50 and others who believe. I too have felt my dad around me. I don't believe it stops here. My daddy gives me many signs that he is near. My little grand daughter had leukemia. During her fight..my daddy showed me so many signs. (too many to mention) They were real.
    (my Grand daughter is is "permanent remission" :)

    OP, Just believe..it doesn't end here..Life just begins after our earth life. :)

    My thoughts and prayers are with you. God Bless. :)
  • green50
    green50 Member Posts: 312
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    marcy said:

    Green50 and others who
    Green50 and others who believe. I too have felt my dad around me. I don't believe it stops here. My daddy gives me many signs that he is near. My little grand daughter had leukemia. During her fight..my daddy showed me so many signs. (too many to mention) They were real.
    (my Grand daughter is is "permanent remission" :)

    OP, Just believe..it doesn't end here..Life just begins after our earth life. :)

    My thoughts and prayers are with you. God Bless. :)

    Thanks Marcy I agree
    Yep, I believe that too and I think thats what makes me smile. I know he is still saying "make it simple woman" and Live one day at a time and fulfill it.
    Thanks again Marcy and all of you
    My prayers to all as always and big hugs
    Sandy
  • LPack
    LPack Member Posts: 645
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    sad
    Liz,
    I too know how you feel. I lost my mom to cancer Christmas morning 1998. She had breast cancer. We came Christmas Eve to Arizona and she was sitting up in a chair, my sister had her moved her to a hospice facility. She looked at me and said I love you and I am glad you came. That was all, she went to Heaven the next morning. I can honestly say that there was not a day that I did not think about Mom or cry for a very long time. Time does heal, but now the memories are all good. I sometimes wish she was here to talk with regarding my time with cancer, but then again, I see how hard it has been on my dad to watch what he sees his daughter going through and am just as happy to know that I will see Mom again when I go to Heaven.

    Know that right now I will pray for you and your mother as if I don't I will forget!

    Love and prayers,
    Libby
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