My hair is gone and it's OK

jakeca
jakeca Member Posts: 92
edited March 2014 in Breast Cancer #1
I am 19 days past my first chemo treatment and for the last two days, my hair has been falling like snow. So today I went to my beautician and had her shave my head. I had a crying fit before I went (my poor husband), but I took two friends with me--one to hold my hand and one to take pictures--and I made it just fine during the shaving process and have been fine ever since. It is a relief to have it over and I feel like I am one step closer to a full recovery. I will carry the pictures with me and when someone has the audacity to wonder how I look with no hair, I will whip out those pictures and leave my wig or hat on my head! My husband has been so supportive and sympathetic and that helps, oh so much. You should have seen us this evening. I got a "Wii" game for Christmas and there we were in the middle of our living room, him in his long underwear and me with my bald head, bowling, skiing and playing baseball!!! Keep in mind that he is 63 and I am 59! Happy New Year to everyone. May 2009 bring us all nothing but brighter days!
«1

Comments

  • RE
    RE Member Posts: 4,591 Member
    WIGS AND WII
    I can see you now playing your WII and enjoying yourself, good for you! I am impressed with your ability to shave your head, i have lost my hair 4 times and not once did I ever have the nerve to shave my head, good for you! You are also right that you are one step closer to regaining your health, another reason to rejoice! I wish you well and send many (((HUGS))) your way!

    RE
  • sausageroll
    sausageroll Member Posts: 415
    Jo!in the club
    Hi jakeca,mine fell out this week too! I look like a mangy dog. I may go for a wig on Monday, although I'm not that keen. Good luck with your wig or whatever you choose to wear. I'll be thinking of you.
  • RE
    RE Member Posts: 4,591 Member
    HATS SCARVES AND SUCH
    If you go to HEAVENLYHATS.COM and fill out a short request form they will send you a few hats or scarfs whatever you req. free of charge. I did this the last time my hair fell out and it was really nice to receive a little surprise in the mail. It brightened my day and most likely will do the same for you all.

    RE
  • Jadie
    Jadie Member Posts: 723
    Hi JackcaI had a friend
    Hi Jackca

    I had a friend buzz my head when my hair started coming out. It gave me some sence of controll over what was happening to my body.

    I hope no one ever has the audacity to ask you what you look like bald. Your local cancer society usually has scarves, caps, wigs etc that they will give you. Mine had a big selection.

    So glad you are enjoying your new Wii. They are so much fun aren't they?

    Happy New Year
    Jadie
  • chenheart
    chenheart Member Posts: 5,159
    Hair , Hair!!!
    Way to go, sister! You have a grand attitude about all of this, crying fits included~ all part and parcel of this battle you are winning against The Beast!

    For the record ( I think I am the ONLY one who never put 2 and 2 together when I went through chemo) when you lose your hair, you will lose it ANYWHERE you have hair. And yes, I mean anywhere! It was quite a shock to me!!!! Newborn babies have more hair on their bodies than chemo-babes! :-)

    Keep us posted on your progress~ we walk your journey with you!

    You have made us smile with your post!

    Hugs,
    Claudia
  • mimivac
    mimivac Member Posts: 2,143
    chenheart said:

    Hair , Hair!!!
    Way to go, sister! You have a grand attitude about all of this, crying fits included~ all part and parcel of this battle you are winning against The Beast!

    For the record ( I think I am the ONLY one who never put 2 and 2 together when I went through chemo) when you lose your hair, you will lose it ANYWHERE you have hair. And yes, I mean anywhere! It was quite a shock to me!!!! Newborn babies have more hair on their bodies than chemo-babes! :-)

    Keep us posted on your progress~ we walk your journey with you!

    You have made us smile with your post!

    Hugs,
    Claudia

    Legs and all
    I for one am looking forward to not shaving my legs. Although my oncologist told me that some people only lose the hair on their head. I am Mediterranean, so that will likely be me.
  • ladybug22
    ladybug22 Member Posts: 646
    It ok
    I shaved my on head. I looked better bald at the time. My hair is back and i just love my hair it was wave now i never had wave and body.
    You go girl with your will. The brighter days are to come HAPPY NEW YEAR TO ALL
  • mmontero38
    mmontero38 Member Posts: 1,510
    You go girl and do what is
    You go girl and do what is right for you. Enjoy the Wii, and embrace life. It will get better from here. Wishing you a 2009 full of health and peace. Hugs, Lili
  • KathiM
    KathiM Member Posts: 8,028 Member
    I went 'naked' alot....
    After my hair was history, I tried a wig for 30 minutes. I was at a clients site (computer consultant) and I reached up, tearing the wig from my head, and declared "No more!". After that, it was for warmth or coverage that I wore scarves or hats. Often, weather permitting, I went without, and had my pink pin proudly on my lapel.

    You know, the things that happen physically to us as a result of our fight is mostly beyond our control. We should be proud of doing everything we can to defeat the beast, similar to the way that the people in the military wear their medals and ribbons for their fights. If someone looked at me, I would return their look, and smile. It was a great conversation starter, and I had so many warm wishes, it REALLY encouraged me to fight even harder. Now, I know that I am rather outgoing (really, Kathi...RATHER? outgoing????), but even if all we do is to hold our heads up proudly and never be ashamed, that's what it's all about.

    The one thing that still, to this day, sets me off is "I'm so sorry". And a look of tragedy on their face. "Please, don't feel sorry for me. It's not something I chose, but I have such faith in myself to fight a good fight, that you needn't feel that way for me!"

    Hugs, Kathi
  • tasha_111
    tasha_111 Member Posts: 2,072
    chenheart said:

    Hair , Hair!!!
    Way to go, sister! You have a grand attitude about all of this, crying fits included~ all part and parcel of this battle you are winning against The Beast!

    For the record ( I think I am the ONLY one who never put 2 and 2 together when I went through chemo) when you lose your hair, you will lose it ANYWHERE you have hair. And yes, I mean anywhere! It was quite a shock to me!!!! Newborn babies have more hair on their bodies than chemo-babes! :-)

    Keep us posted on your progress~ we walk your journey with you!

    You have made us smile with your post!

    Hugs,
    Claudia

    Chen.......
    Claudia, you have made me laugh until I cry here. I didn't expect THAT either and it was the first to go, Man I was Mortified! I shaved all my head hair off 2 days later when it started coming out in handfuls. When it was gone...It was gone, No Problem. It kinda hosed me off when I lost my eyelashes tho, I thought I looked like a pig..But they came back even thicker than before...Great summat to look forward to eh? <<<(see I'm learning Canadian) J x
  • lindaprocopio
    lindaprocopio Member Posts: 1,980
    You'll love how COOL the pillowcase feels on your bald head!
    And those silky-smooth hairless legs: no shave will ever be close enough to match that smoothness! I've been bald now 5 weeks and only wore my wig a couple times so far, for when I go into town or have an appointment. (I work from home.) I wear hats mostly because it's COLD here, but I'm already used to my bald head. I think you have to have a sense of humor and acceptance of your new 'look' and what it represents. I have my 3rd round of chemo tomorrow and will be wearing a baseball cap that reads "Does this hat make my head look bald?", along with my "Live Strong" shirt. I had little Post-It-Note pads and ballpoint pens printed up as little post-Christmas gifts to take tomorrow for the chemotherapy staff that read: "I love the smell of chemo in the morning. Smells like remission." I miss my red hair, but I am proud to be a part of the sisterhood that shares my bald head.
  • Chellebug
    Chellebug Member Posts: 133
    Odes to My Hair
    I found a sense of comfort in writing poetry about my hair during the different stages of loss and regrowth. Here is the one I wrote when my husband finally had to shave my head:


    Ode To My Hair (Part 3)
    It wasn't but a week ago, I noticed something new.
    Instead of hair upon my head, my scalp was showing through.
    A knitted cap or fancy scarf could cover up the sight.
    But they did make my head to ache and itch and scratch at night.

    I'd had enough the other night and wanted to be brave.
    and contemplated for a time, if it was time to shave
    the straggly hairs upon my head that stuck out all about,
    or should I wait another week before I tried that out.

    Sean looked at me, and smiled so sweet, not wanting to persuade.
    He knew the choice was up to me, and let me contemplate.
    And finally at a half past ten, I knew just what to do.
    And Sean took out his little kit and bid my hair adieu.

    I couldn't look. I feared the worst. What was I soon to see?
    A bumpy, knobby, wrinkly head, a scar or two, or three.
    I asked my man to step outside, to give me time alone
    That I may peer upon my head in private.....on my own.

    With eyes shut tight, I reached up high and felt my prickly hair.
    Then slowly, peeked...then quickly looked...and finally stood and stared.
    It's not so bad. I see no bumps or scars or wrinkly skin.
    In fact, the lone hair that stuck out's no longer on my chin.

    What unexpected freedom came! What unexpected joy!
    If I could have but one wish now, I'm sure that I'd employ
    That every woman have this chance to feel the freedom of
    A barren head, a hairless chin, and love from up above.

    It's hard to lay aside our pride. It's hard to lay things down.
    To things we've had for oh so long, like hair upon our crown.
    If hair, or job, or child, or dream, before the Lord you've placed...
    I pray that God will fill you up with his unending grace.
  • jakeca
    jakeca Member Posts: 92
    Poem
    Oh, that poem is marvelous. You have a gift. Thanks for sharing!
  • cruf
    cruf Member Posts: 908
    Chellebug said:

    Odes to My Hair
    I found a sense of comfort in writing poetry about my hair during the different stages of loss and regrowth. Here is the one I wrote when my husband finally had to shave my head:


    Ode To My Hair (Part 3)
    It wasn't but a week ago, I noticed something new.
    Instead of hair upon my head, my scalp was showing through.
    A knitted cap or fancy scarf could cover up the sight.
    But they did make my head to ache and itch and scratch at night.

    I'd had enough the other night and wanted to be brave.
    and contemplated for a time, if it was time to shave
    the straggly hairs upon my head that stuck out all about,
    or should I wait another week before I tried that out.

    Sean looked at me, and smiled so sweet, not wanting to persuade.
    He knew the choice was up to me, and let me contemplate.
    And finally at a half past ten, I knew just what to do.
    And Sean took out his little kit and bid my hair adieu.

    I couldn't look. I feared the worst. What was I soon to see?
    A bumpy, knobby, wrinkly head, a scar or two, or three.
    I asked my man to step outside, to give me time alone
    That I may peer upon my head in private.....on my own.

    With eyes shut tight, I reached up high and felt my prickly hair.
    Then slowly, peeked...then quickly looked...and finally stood and stared.
    It's not so bad. I see no bumps or scars or wrinkly skin.
    In fact, the lone hair that stuck out's no longer on my chin.

    What unexpected freedom came! What unexpected joy!
    If I could have but one wish now, I'm sure that I'd employ
    That every woman have this chance to feel the freedom of
    A barren head, a hairless chin, and love from up above.

    It's hard to lay aside our pride. It's hard to lay things down.
    To things we've had for oh so long, like hair upon our crown.
    If hair, or job, or child, or dream, before the Lord you've placed...
    I pray that God will fill you up with his unending grace.

    Poem!
    What a great poem! I never had chemo or loss of my hair!I don't think I could have handeled it. I think you ladies are amazing for looking past the obvious and moving on. Thank you so much for sharing! HUGS!! Cathy
  • mmontero38
    mmontero38 Member Posts: 1,510
    Chellebug said:

    Odes to My Hair
    I found a sense of comfort in writing poetry about my hair during the different stages of loss and regrowth. Here is the one I wrote when my husband finally had to shave my head:


    Ode To My Hair (Part 3)
    It wasn't but a week ago, I noticed something new.
    Instead of hair upon my head, my scalp was showing through.
    A knitted cap or fancy scarf could cover up the sight.
    But they did make my head to ache and itch and scratch at night.

    I'd had enough the other night and wanted to be brave.
    and contemplated for a time, if it was time to shave
    the straggly hairs upon my head that stuck out all about,
    or should I wait another week before I tried that out.

    Sean looked at me, and smiled so sweet, not wanting to persuade.
    He knew the choice was up to me, and let me contemplate.
    And finally at a half past ten, I knew just what to do.
    And Sean took out his little kit and bid my hair adieu.

    I couldn't look. I feared the worst. What was I soon to see?
    A bumpy, knobby, wrinkly head, a scar or two, or three.
    I asked my man to step outside, to give me time alone
    That I may peer upon my head in private.....on my own.

    With eyes shut tight, I reached up high and felt my prickly hair.
    Then slowly, peeked...then quickly looked...and finally stood and stared.
    It's not so bad. I see no bumps or scars or wrinkly skin.
    In fact, the lone hair that stuck out's no longer on my chin.

    What unexpected freedom came! What unexpected joy!
    If I could have but one wish now, I'm sure that I'd employ
    That every woman have this chance to feel the freedom of
    A barren head, a hairless chin, and love from up above.

    It's hard to lay aside our pride. It's hard to lay things down.
    To things we've had for oh so long, like hair upon our crown.
    If hair, or job, or child, or dream, before the Lord you've placed...
    I pray that God will fill you up with his unending grace.

    Thanks Chelle for sharing.
    Thanks Chelle for sharing. What a great poem. I also thought I would be more traumatized by the loss of my hair but it didn't bother me as much as I thought it would. Hugs, Lili
  • tasha_111
    tasha_111 Member Posts: 2,072
    jakeca said:

    Poem
    Oh, that poem is marvelous. You have a gift. Thanks for sharing!

    Poem.
    Brilliant! That just said it all. Thank you J xx
  • Wibby
    Wibby Member Posts: 27
    Chellebug said:

    Odes to My Hair
    I found a sense of comfort in writing poetry about my hair during the different stages of loss and regrowth. Here is the one I wrote when my husband finally had to shave my head:


    Ode To My Hair (Part 3)
    It wasn't but a week ago, I noticed something new.
    Instead of hair upon my head, my scalp was showing through.
    A knitted cap or fancy scarf could cover up the sight.
    But they did make my head to ache and itch and scratch at night.

    I'd had enough the other night and wanted to be brave.
    and contemplated for a time, if it was time to shave
    the straggly hairs upon my head that stuck out all about,
    or should I wait another week before I tried that out.

    Sean looked at me, and smiled so sweet, not wanting to persuade.
    He knew the choice was up to me, and let me contemplate.
    And finally at a half past ten, I knew just what to do.
    And Sean took out his little kit and bid my hair adieu.

    I couldn't look. I feared the worst. What was I soon to see?
    A bumpy, knobby, wrinkly head, a scar or two, or three.
    I asked my man to step outside, to give me time alone
    That I may peer upon my head in private.....on my own.

    With eyes shut tight, I reached up high and felt my prickly hair.
    Then slowly, peeked...then quickly looked...and finally stood and stared.
    It's not so bad. I see no bumps or scars or wrinkly skin.
    In fact, the lone hair that stuck out's no longer on my chin.

    What unexpected freedom came! What unexpected joy!
    If I could have but one wish now, I'm sure that I'd employ
    That every woman have this chance to feel the freedom of
    A barren head, a hairless chin, and love from up above.

    It's hard to lay aside our pride. It's hard to lay things down.
    To things we've had for oh so long, like hair upon our crown.
    If hair, or job, or child, or dream, before the Lord you've placed...
    I pray that God will fill you up with his unending grace.

    Wow! That's How I Felt!
    I've never written before but felt so moved by your poem that I had to reply. I shaved my head when the hair started coming out in clumps. I loved being bald - it was so "free-ing" for me. I never got a wig, but started out wearing hats when I taught. Eventually, the hats went and I taught high school as a "Bald Eagle" (our school mascot). One student even remarked that she couldn't remember what I looked like with hair - that was a great compliment. I finished chemo last June - day after graduation and have been patiently (ya, right) waiting for my hair to come back. I've enjoyed reading all the postings about hair. I actually prefer baldness to what I have now - it sticks out all over and is a tad unruly. Thanks to all for the courage to write and the support you have unknowingly given me during my treatment.
    Libby
  • sausageroll
    sausageroll Member Posts: 415
    tasha_111 said:

    Poem.
    Brilliant! That just said it all. Thank you J xx

    Great poem
    What a great poem! Thank you.
    I have my second infusion tomorrow and lost my hair a week ago. I hate the thought of a wig and hats..but maybe will get a wig for some occasions. I don't mind my bald head either.
  • Joycelouise
    Joycelouise Member Posts: 482
    Wibby said:

    Wow! That's How I Felt!
    I've never written before but felt so moved by your poem that I had to reply. I shaved my head when the hair started coming out in clumps. I loved being bald - it was so "free-ing" for me. I never got a wig, but started out wearing hats when I taught. Eventually, the hats went and I taught high school as a "Bald Eagle" (our school mascot). One student even remarked that she couldn't remember what I looked like with hair - that was a great compliment. I finished chemo last June - day after graduation and have been patiently (ya, right) waiting for my hair to come back. I've enjoyed reading all the postings about hair. I actually prefer baldness to what I have now - it sticks out all over and is a tad unruly. Thanks to all for the courage to write and the support you have unknowingly given me during my treatment.
    Libby

    I am glad you wrote, Wibby!
    I am glad you wrote, Wibby! Welcome, love Joyce
  • cnwrn
    cnwrn Member Posts: 28
    no hair
    Hi: I had my husband shave my hair in Sept. 2 days after it started coming out in wads. I had to stop chemo after my treatment on 10-10, and my hair is coming back like crazy now. Everyday my head looks darker and I bet in a couple of weeks my scalp won't be showing through. I have been using hats, I used a wig when I had to work a couple of weeks ago (I have to work once every 90 days to keep my RN job). I will be back at work at the end of Jan. and if I have enough hair to have no scalp show through, I will work wigless!

    There were several benefits of being hairless. I used just a drop of shampoo for my scalp. I didn't have to shave my legs for over 2 months (I have to do that again now). I didn't have the "stragler hairs" that have been appearing on my chin since my mid-30's to deal with (they have now returned also).

    I am interested to see if my hair comes in straight or curly. It was wavy before, and it is coming darker (with quite a bit of white on the temples). I'm just glad I had this happen in the cold weather because it would be too hot to wear something on my head in the hot weather. I never have like wearing hats or anything on my head unless the temperatures were below 20 (which happens often here in Cleveland!)

    Take Care!

    Cathy