mastectomy and reconstruction

susabella
susabella Member Posts: 46
edited March 2014 in Breast Cancer #1
Hi, I just got diagnosed with DCIS after 3 biopsies. Originally thought it was just ADH, but now know the margins aren't clear, etc. A total mastectomy is necessary, having it on 11/6. Am having immediate reconstruction. Hopefully no chemo or rediation, but they will be checking the nodes. I feel such loss and grief. My Mom died of breast cancer 12 years ago. How do you stay hopeful? I'm mostly just terrified all the time.

Comments

  • kathydaly
    kathydaly Member Posts: 81
    Of course you are terrified. We all were when we got the same news. If you weren't, then I'd reaally be concerned, lol.

    I don't know what all ur abbrev.'s mean, but BC is BC, no matter.

    I was told on a Thurs. i needed the same as u, and it was literally gone by the next Thurs. You are having a loss, but instead, we get to keep YOU!!

    I didn't get to do reconstruction til 2 yrs. later because they needed to be sure I was still gonna be around. And, THERE I WAS, still pestering away at them. lol.

    Having your reconstruction done right away will help enormously, and I am so happy u can and u are!

    My first run-in w/this BEAST was 15 yrs. ago, and I can assure you what they had then to help fight your mother's BC doesn't even come close to what they have now. I am so sorry for the loss of your mother. She would so approve of what you're doing.

    My only daughter was 5 when i was diag. in '91. She is now 24. I worry about this exact scenario occuring, but then I pray.

    That was #1,(about the diff. in the meds.), #2 it sounds like they have caught this early, albeit the loss of your breast makde it feel not early to you, and I am very sorry it has to happen, i know EXACTLY how this feels, as do many others here, and it is a painful loss.

    In the week I had to wait, I began thinking of my left breast much like in the movie "The Alien", and that if Maest. didn't happen, it would burst out of me as in the movie and consume me. And I have to say when I saw that movie the 1st time, it scared the crap out of me,(I would have used another word there normally). Maybe that visualization will help you.

    And if you don't have any nodes involved, you will be so deliriously happy over that you won't feel the loss of the breast as badly, and if they are some, you will have the same reaction, I think.

    But now they will be following you closely, very closely, as they have me, and that will save you're life, if you are as religous about it as they are. These rigorous follow-up's have saved my life twice since then. Both re-occurances were caught v early in '04 w/an MRI of r/breast, 7mm. mass, encapsulated and the out in lumpectomy. And now in '06 a 4cm. mass, encapsulated nodes, caught on CAT scan and PET scan, out and I am now w/NED.

    BECAUSE YOUR MOTHER DIED, IT DOES NOT MEAN YOU WILL, OK?

    My heart goes out to you, stay close to your friends that make you laugh and will cry with you too.

    I stay hopeful because I have seen the miracles.
    I also pray a lot and get a lot from that, perhaps you already have a spiritual aspect to your life. It was paramount to me.

    You will be in my thoughts and prayers. Huggggs, Kathy
  • Susan956
    Susan956 Member Posts: 510
    Hi and Welcome to our clan....

    There are many of us here and we will provide with lots of reasons to be hopeful and to know that there is life after Breast Cancer.... However, we do all understand the absolute fear when you are first diagnosed... For me I had no family history of the beast, however, the lady that helped me raise my son (I am a single Mom) had died of BC about 7 years ago. So when I was first diagnosed it was super scary... But the great thing is that the treatment knowledge over the last 10 years have made leaps and bounds in knowledge. BC is now very treatable and the majority of us will be around and kicking for many, many years to come. I intend to see my Grandchildren grow up... and my son isn't married yet. Since I only had a lumpectomy, I can't give you good advice on the issues with mastectomy & reconstruction... but there are many others here who can give you help on those issues. This is a great place to get answers.. humor... and understanding. Please post and let us know how you are doing...

    Take Care... God Bless....

    Susan
  • JUSTAWORD
    JUSTAWORD Member Posts: 18
    Well welcome to a whole new group of friends. I just had my surgery in sept and will see my oncologist next week. i opt not to have reconstruction and not to have a lumpectomy, both were offered. I was told that radiation makes the skin tough and harder to feel for lumps and being a worry wart i didnt want to go thru that. Your age i think has alot to do with the choices you will make (im in early 50's) and i already breast feed so they did their job. one thing i have noticed with this disease is that everyone's circumstance are different but we all are ready to fight the fight to live another day. The positive out look is that fortunately we dont need our breast to breathe, eat or think. They are just window dressing and unless you'll be walking around naked you can still dress the windows (lol) My heart goes out to you. Take good care of yourself and may God Bless you and your family. Keep the faith !!!!!!!!
  • KathiM
    KathiM Member Posts: 8,028 Member
    Terrorizing is what the beast does BEST! It is an awful advisary. But a BEATABLE one! The post about 'a nice thought' speaks volumes....we all emerge from the battle looking and feeling differently. Sometimes you just need to gather your faith and hope, and jump off the ledge, just like bungie jumping.

    "Anyone who says winning isn't everything has never battled cancer"

    Hugs, Kathi
  • billswife
    billswife Member Posts: 33
    I had my mastectomy on 9/27 with immediate reconstruction. I did have a postive node so I will have to have chemo and I see my new oncologist in 2 weeks. You stay hopeful because the people on this board will help you through it.
    When I was first diagnosed, I has just sold my house in NJ, bought a new one in SC and had 6 weeks to make the move AND deal with the surgery!
    These are the people that made me believe I could pull it all off and enjoy my new life. Will you have bad days, sure. But there are good ones too. Two weeks after my release from the hospital I was out to dinner with my family.
    Family, friends, & faith will get you through.
    You may have cancer but it doesn't have you.
    Hugs & Prayers
    Kathy
  • susabella
    susabella Member Posts: 46
    kathydaly said:

    Of course you are terrified. We all were when we got the same news. If you weren't, then I'd reaally be concerned, lol.

    I don't know what all ur abbrev.'s mean, but BC is BC, no matter.

    I was told on a Thurs. i needed the same as u, and it was literally gone by the next Thurs. You are having a loss, but instead, we get to keep YOU!!

    I didn't get to do reconstruction til 2 yrs. later because they needed to be sure I was still gonna be around. And, THERE I WAS, still pestering away at them. lol.

    Having your reconstruction done right away will help enormously, and I am so happy u can and u are!

    My first run-in w/this BEAST was 15 yrs. ago, and I can assure you what they had then to help fight your mother's BC doesn't even come close to what they have now. I am so sorry for the loss of your mother. She would so approve of what you're doing.

    My only daughter was 5 when i was diag. in '91. She is now 24. I worry about this exact scenario occuring, but then I pray.

    That was #1,(about the diff. in the meds.), #2 it sounds like they have caught this early, albeit the loss of your breast makde it feel not early to you, and I am very sorry it has to happen, i know EXACTLY how this feels, as do many others here, and it is a painful loss.

    In the week I had to wait, I began thinking of my left breast much like in the movie "The Alien", and that if Maest. didn't happen, it would burst out of me as in the movie and consume me. And I have to say when I saw that movie the 1st time, it scared the crap out of me,(I would have used another word there normally). Maybe that visualization will help you.

    And if you don't have any nodes involved, you will be so deliriously happy over that you won't feel the loss of the breast as badly, and if they are some, you will have the same reaction, I think.

    But now they will be following you closely, very closely, as they have me, and that will save you're life, if you are as religous about it as they are. These rigorous follow-up's have saved my life twice since then. Both re-occurances were caught v early in '04 w/an MRI of r/breast, 7mm. mass, encapsulated and the out in lumpectomy. And now in '06 a 4cm. mass, encapsulated nodes, caught on CAT scan and PET scan, out and I am now w/NED.

    BECAUSE YOUR MOTHER DIED, IT DOES NOT MEAN YOU WILL, OK?

    My heart goes out to you, stay close to your friends that make you laugh and will cry with you too.

    I stay hopeful because I have seen the miracles.
    I also pray a lot and get a lot from that, perhaps you already have a spiritual aspect to your life. It was paramount to me.

    You will be in my thoughts and prayers. Huggggs, Kathy

    Hi Kathy,
    You are so kind! I feel like I'm not going so crazy tonight. I had several wonderful responses and the support is amazing. I've never witnessed strangers reaching out so much to care and comfort. I worry about burdening my friends and family and I want to stay strong fot them so they won't be so frightened. When my mother was dying from this "beast", she was living with me doing hospice. I'm the oldest daughter in the family, so I was taking care of her, my 5 and 3 year olds and my Dad and siblings. My Mom asked me to take care of everyone when she was gone and to hold everyone together. When I got the news I was so worried about breaking my promise. I have a really hard time accepting that I may need help, I've always been the one to help! I can't believe how brave you've been. And laughing about things! Before I got my diagnosis, I knew I had atypical cells, and an extensive family history, so I got a second and third opinion and that's when they found the BC. I just had a feeling something was there even though 2 hospitals didn't find it, it was Mass General in Boston that did and it took 10 months to get an accurate diagnosis. I thank God everyday for following my instincts!
    I'm trying to look on the bright side, afterall, who in their forties doesn't want the girls lifted back up, and their tummies flat!? LOL
    Thanks so much, I think I can face this, or at least give it a hell of a shot! :)
    My thoughts are with you too!

    Susan
  • susabella
    susabella Member Posts: 46
    billswife said:

    I had my mastectomy on 9/27 with immediate reconstruction. I did have a postive node so I will have to have chemo and I see my new oncologist in 2 weeks. You stay hopeful because the people on this board will help you through it.
    When I was first diagnosed, I has just sold my house in NJ, bought a new one in SC and had 6 weeks to make the move AND deal with the surgery!
    These are the people that made me believe I could pull it all off and enjoy my new life. Will you have bad days, sure. But there are good ones too. Two weeks after my release from the hospital I was out to dinner with my family.
    Family, friends, & faith will get you through.
    You may have cancer but it doesn't have you.
    Hugs & Prayers
    Kathy

    Hi Kathy,
    I'm a "Bill's wife" too! :) How are you feeling? You said your surgery was 9/27, and it's been 4 weeks? What type of reconstruction did you opt for? Are you happy with the results? I'm really sorry about the chemo. I had the nodes checks on the left when I had my lumpectomy in August, but they will check them on the right when they do the bilateral mastectomy. So far, negative. I can't believe you had to move on top of this! I have no reason to complain, my hat is off to you. You are one tough cookie!

    Hugs right back,

    Susan
  • 24242
    24242 Member Posts: 1,398
    Susan956 said:

    Hi and Welcome to our clan....

    There are many of us here and we will provide with lots of reasons to be hopeful and to know that there is life after Breast Cancer.... However, we do all understand the absolute fear when you are first diagnosed... For me I had no family history of the beast, however, the lady that helped me raise my son (I am a single Mom) had died of BC about 7 years ago. So when I was first diagnosed it was super scary... But the great thing is that the treatment knowledge over the last 10 years have made leaps and bounds in knowledge. BC is now very treatable and the majority of us will be around and kicking for many, many years to come. I intend to see my Grandchildren grow up... and my son isn't married yet. Since I only had a lumpectomy, I can't give you good advice on the issues with mastectomy & reconstruction... but there are many others here who can give you help on those issues. This is a great place to get answers.. humor... and understanding. Please post and let us know how you are doing...

    Take Care... God Bless....

    Susan

    It is a very difficult thing to know some who have had to go before us. Cancer always brings those fears to light and most often when we least expect it.
    I am just writing to say that even if there were lymph nodes involved one can survive that too. There is hope every where we look if we are willing to see...
    Hope is something we cultivate within and know that is why I am still around today though I had stage 3 IDC breast cancer with the addition of 11 out of 21 positive nodes. I found making decisions based on my hopes for the future have helped me to cope with all one must when going through such things. I realized early on I could waste my time wishing, hoping and praying things could be different or facing all I must.
    I found hope in the garden in my yard, for "Where there is a garden there is HOPE!"
    You have found a great addition to your survival tools and support is a great thing to have, no matter where you find it.
    Be good to yourself always,
    Tara
  • billswife
    billswife Member Posts: 33
    susabella said:

    Hi Kathy,
    I'm a "Bill's wife" too! :) How are you feeling? You said your surgery was 9/27, and it's been 4 weeks? What type of reconstruction did you opt for? Are you happy with the results? I'm really sorry about the chemo. I had the nodes checks on the left when I had my lumpectomy in August, but they will check them on the right when they do the bilateral mastectomy. So far, negative. I can't believe you had to move on top of this! I have no reason to complain, my hat is off to you. You are one tough cookie!

    Hugs right back,

    Susan

    Hi Susan
    It will actually be 4 weeks this Friday.
    I've tired a lot of the time but I'm doing OK. I had a FLAP from the abdomen ( 2 muscles) and so far, so good. I was very impressed with my plastic surgeon from the get go. He took a lot of time explaining everything to me and my husband. He also was willing to work with us by letting me return to NJ for the additional stages of the surgery ( I need a reduction on the other side, and then the fine tuning) This was a BIG help in not having to look for an additional doctor in a new place.
    I've been staying in NJ with my family while I recuperate but my husband made a quick trip to SC to get the furniture set up in the new house. Hopefully Nov 1 will find us in the new home , ready to face the next part-- the chemo. I meet my new oncologist Nov 9th
  • Lanimae
    Lanimae Member Posts: 1
    Hi, I too got diagnosed with DCIS and my surgery date is 11/6 also. My doctor gave me two choice, a lumpectomy with radiation treatment afterwards or a mastectomy with reconstruction (if I op for that). I've decided with a double mastectomy with immediate recontruction. This decision seems drastic but I'm a higher risk with my mother and sister died at an early age from breast cancer.

    When I first got the news, I was terried and scared! But I found a couple of women through my co-workers that are cancer survivors. I met up with them and talked to them about their experiences. You see, I didn't know there were so many out there that are survivors!

    I am staying strong and you can too!
  • gtgrama11
    gtgrama11 Member Posts: 1
    Gtgrama11-I have a web page and part of my story is on it. I too had mastectomies with reconstruction 11 years ago. I had saline implants not the flap my Dr. advised me against the flap. I will not lie to you it was painfull but they do give you pain medication and if you use it, it will definitly help. I was glad that I had it all done at once. and the surgery to replace the expanders was a snap for me I did not have a lot of pain with it. I did not have the nipple surgery I just wanted to have some shape so clothes would fit. Guess this is vain but it has helped me deal with this loss. This is definitly not a easy decision to make for anyone. God bless and my prayers are with you.
  • Sarah06
    Sarah06 Member Posts: 30
    Hope your reconstruction goes well. I used tissue transfer, where no muscle is used. It is great. I needed two doctors. I used a doctor who is now in New York, and the doctor who developed the procedure. What's great about the tissue if done by the right doctors (only about 3 teams in the world who do this procedure) is it is your own tissue and you don't have to change implants. Best of luck. Just wanted to let you know that tissue transfer without muscle sacrifice is an option. Most surgeons won't tell you this option, because they don't do it. You don't even find it in the breast reconstruction books, which only list TRAM or gluteral transfer which will take your muscle. If you already decided and it's implants, I wish you the best of luck. Sarah