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incontinence

william1
Posts: 35
Joined: Nov 2005

Friends,

OK, the catheter came out Monday, 12 days after surgery. I'm still flowing like a river ( day 14 )when ever I stand up, laugh out loud, or climb the steps.

I am doing the kegels as often as I think of them. I can slow urination only by controling liquid intake. I know this is the wrong thing to do. I started off wearing 4 depends a day. Now I wear a depends and a large pad. The pads do seem to help conserve the depends if I change them often.

This seems to be more aggravating than the catheter. Is there an average number of days before one regains some control.

I feel almost good enough to return to work, but can't like this. What's the story.

thanks,
william1

rogermoore's picture
rogermoore
Posts: 265
Joined: Mar 2002

William,

Kegel, Kegel, Kegel. Until you train your muscles to replace the function of the prostate you are going to have leakage. It is going to be somewhat awkward, but you have to contract your abdominal muscles (kegel) and hold them. Eventually, it will become second-nature.

As for the time, it varies. Don't rush going back to work, it will probably be a couple of weeks more.

Roger

william1
Posts: 35
Joined: Nov 2005

Post-Op depression or Boredom has set in I guess. My wife has went back to work and that leaves only me and the TV for most of the day.

I live in the country, deep in the backwoods next to an old country creek. The population of the closest town is only about 1,000. It's 35 miles to the closest Walmart or Mall. So to entertain myself yesterday, I visited the old family cemetary about 2 1/2 miles from my home. I viewed my family's plot...remembering my relationship with each of them. ( Parents- Aunts-Uncles-cousins ) I'm basicly a private person and find it difficult to discuss my medical condition with family and/or friends. This attitude, if that's what it is, has caused my wife some grief. I have 5 siblings and have only minimally discussed my diagnosis with only one of them, an older sister, very briefly prior to surgery. My wife doesn't understand my feelings, but as far as I know has honored my wishes.

As our county population began to grow a few years back, the new commers have elected to use the free church cemetaries instead of purchasing a commercial plot. For this reason, my wife and I purchased our head stone and slabs a few years ago and had them placed to the right of my parents, preserving our final resting place. I hadn't visited the family plot since the burial of dear friend and neighbor about three years ago. A visit was certainly overdue and I'm so thankful for what turned out to be a pleasant and rewarding experience.

It was a beautiful afternoon and time seemed to slip away as I reminisced with deceased family, old friends and neighbors of a time gone by but not yet forgotten. The old unpainted Cypress built HardShell/Primitive Baptist church still standing in peaceful solitude, a solemn remembrance of a time of strict Biblical adhearance prior to todays passive religious beliefs. I remembered the women with their long dresses and hair twisted in a ball hidden under a scarf and the men standing proud in their black hats and white shirts (never a tie) and worn brogan boots. I could visualize the older men taking a chew of tobacco on their way to the shed where they would take a sip of moonshine from a jug not-so-well hidden in the bushes nearby and the women and children patiently awaiting a cool drink of water from the old hand pump that surprisingly still exist to this day. The days when children were seen and not heard, a discipline lost today. The days when children didn't need to know a grown-ups first name and when parents took great pride in observing the mannerisms of their children.

A million treasured memories floated thur my mind as I visited this old cemetary. I allowed myself to visit the mischievious times of a barefoot boy who loved and respected his friends and neighbors, who picked tobacco in the summer time and fished in the creek whenever possible. A simpler time, no doubt. A time when love and guidance was the responsibility of parents and community. It was all the security one would ever need.

Until Cancer.

later,
william1

Benji48
Posts: 117
Joined: May 2003

Hi William,
I hope I can convey these thoughts properly. I believe you, like the rest of us, have come face to face with our own mortality.I have a personal saying that "Everyone is going to die, but nobody believes it!" Back 10yrs ago when my mother died the very first thing I did was go out & buy a cemetary plot & headstone for me & my wife. Never had given it a thought prior to that experience!Now, with only one son left, yesterday we went to the funeral director & ,and made the arrangements for our own demise, not that we plan to check out anytime soon!.Yes, life is a "terminal disease" & the most important things remaining is our relationships with those we consider our true friends & family.I'm sure you will see to it that those are done in the proper manner. From this posting I see that you are a compassionate,caring, nostalgic person & I wish you the best in whatever life holds for you now.
Sincerely, Ben

Mark58
Posts: 29
Joined: Jun 2004

William1
Regarding incontinence, the exercise that helped me the most was to stop the flow while urinating. I would try to stop the flow several times each trip to the bathroom. Try not to become discouraged. It will not happen overnight. I had to wear a pad for several months before I was dry. By 4 months after surgery, I was completely dry. Good luck to you.
Mark

jd_smith58's picture
jd_smith58
Posts: 7
Joined: Feb 2006

Hey William
My name is JD and we talked a few days ago in the chat room on this site. I'm one week behind you in the surgery, in getting the catheter out and as far as incontinence, probably about the same. My surgery was 2/15/06, catheter came out 2/28/06. I'm going through about 8 to 10 pads a day so far, the first day I had no control what so ever, the 2nd day maybe a little for part of the day, today, Friday, maybe a little more, but I stand up, walk or anything other than sit, I leak, I may have a little control, but very little. If I sit long enough to get a full bladder, I seem to have more control and I can pee really good, but right after that, If I don't sit down, I leak. I'm doing the Kegels pretty faithfully, and from what I read, it's going to take some time, about a month at best to get the muscles in shape. So, any way William, you're not alone and from the many survivor stories I've read, it will get better, just takes some time. So, hang in there and I will too. God bless
JD

william1
Posts: 35
Joined: Nov 2005

Hi JD,
I remember the chat and enjoyed it so much. I find myself checking into the chat room almost every morning looking to chat with other men who have prostate cancer.

It's now 12 days since I lost the catheter and I think I'm progressing quiet well. Last night I hardly leaked at all. I leaked very little on the way to the toilet. What a great feeling it was to wake up and void almost a normal volume. Never thought I'd say such a thing.

I've been working outside in the yard almost every day, raking leaves and pine straw. I increase the time I spend out there each day. In addition I walk 1 1/2 miles each afternoon. I believe this exercise has helped with the incontinence as well as the Kegels. I can now retain enough urine to expand the bladder and allow me to void rather than leak. I don't have a lot of volume each time, but, I'm confident this will increase.

toeman
Posts: 1
Joined: Mar 2006

William,
I had my prostate removed 16 weeks ago and still leak like a sieve. I use depends and a pad as you do but I use about 7 pads a day. At the 6 month point if nothing has changed I am thinking of an artificial sphincter.

bajakid
Posts: 38
Joined: May 2006

Have you had the Artificial Sphincter surgery yet? I have had the sling surgery but it didn't work.

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