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More bad news

grandma047's picture
grandma047
Posts: 381
Joined: Feb 2004

I went to the chemo doctor today and my counts are up, so I'm starting FOLFIRI tomorrow. That's the good news. The bad news is that he says that if this doesn't work, then he doesn't think we're going to beat this. He said he would make sure that I would be comfortable. They put me on the patch for pain and I'm to take the morphine also, until the patch takes effect. Then if I still have break through pain, I'm to take the morphine. The pain patch is called duragesic. He said it's stronger than morphine. I also will have to take the shots for the white and red blood counts while I'm doing chemo and he's also worried about my nutrition. I lost 3 more lbs. I'm over weight about 20 lbs so I don't really understand why he's worried about this. I admit, I have no appetite. He says to make myself eat. I don't know, I'm just kinda confused right now. I'm not ready to give up, but I have to admit that I am getting really tired. My tumor is continuing to grow very aggressively. Chemo doctor says we really don't have much time to shrink it, but no one will touch it like it is now. I almost feel like I'm being told that it's just to prolong my life. He doesn't really feel that he can cure me. I don't know what to feel right now. Anyhow, Just wanted to let you know, that chemo is on for tomorrow. Please pray for me.
Love ya all
Love and prayers, Judy(grandma047)

Shandle
Posts: 205
Joined: Apr 2005

Judy, you have a right to feel confused and anxious about the new drug, and if it will be effective. But please don't give up. I've heard of some amazing stories of patients whose diagnoses was pretty grim according to their Dr, but the patient pulls through. Eat as healthy as you can to keep up your strength, know that God is with you, believe, surround yourself with laughter, support, and I will indeed pray for you!!!! Wanda

jsabol's picture
jsabol
Posts: 1156
Joined: Dec 2003

Judy,
Good luck with the chemo and the new pain patch. I will be thinking of you tomorrow and, as always, keeping you in my prayers.
Wishing you continued strength, Judy

chutney
Posts: 11
Joined: Mar 2005

Judy,

My prayers and thoughts are with you. Keep fighting and do not give up

Love Chutney

crazylady
Posts: 544
Joined: Jun 2004

Judy,
I'm glad that you will be able to start chemo tomorrow and I'm praying that it works! I'm really sorry that nothing has worked so far and that you keep getting bad news. I'll be praying for you!
Jamie

nanuk's picture
nanuk
Posts: 1363
Joined: Dec 2003

God Bless, Judy..you are on my prayer list. Try to keep up your strength with whatever food and exercise you can manage. I found that smoothies with ice creme and my favorite fruits helped when I couldn't eat..sometimes you can drink when you don't want to eat. Nanuk

AuthorUnknown
Posts: 1564
Joined: May 2006

Judy,
I have strong faith in God that He is guiding us to the best path and He is watching over us. Please continue to take your strong faith in Him and think positive. I will pray for you tomorrow and will keep you in my daily prayer.

Do not be afraid and be strong. You can beat it!!

Rosa

CAMaura
Posts: 719
Joined: Feb 2005

Hi there, Judy,
My prayers amd good thoughts are with you. So glad that you can finally start chemo again.....that means your system is stronger - inspite of the tumor.
Wishing you the best,
Maura

pjenks57's picture
pjenks57
Posts: 112
Joined: Nov 2003

God Bless you Judy. I am always compelled to post a reply to you. I watch for you and enjoy keeping track of you. I pray for you often. I am sorry you are going thru all of this but you are undoubtfully the strongest person I have encountered!

I agree with the other folks. When hubby was dx in Sept 03 I didn't have a church home but have since found an awsome place to worship. My pastor and I talked, and he told me what I needed to do was to visulize myself laying this durn cancer problem at Jesus's feet. He would then take it upon himself to deal with it and I wouldn't have to. Let him take the worry and grief and he would make sure the plan went as planned but I could just let it go. When I do get down I visulize myself crawling up into his lap and crying on his shoulder. He wraps his loving arms around me and what a comfort it is to me. I tear up just remembering the peaceful wonderful feeling it brings to me.

Sorry to ramble but it has sure helped me deal with this crap so I thought I would share it with you.

Take care.
Love pj

grandma047's picture
grandma047
Posts: 381
Joined: Feb 2004

Hi PJ, It made me tear up to read your post. That's a great way to look at it. I will try to start doing this. I hve faith in whatever God's plan is, but I guess I get a little impatient. Maybe that's what He's trying to teach me, patience. Thanks for sharing your experience with me.
Love and prayers, Judy(grandma047)

KKLoop
Posts: 73
Joined: Mar 2005

Do not throw in the towel. You will go when it is your time to go! No one knows but GOD and He has a plan. YOu hang in there and never doubt for one minute that you will get better!

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