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Positive thoughts please

rwkeach
Posts: 17
Joined: Feb 2004

Hi everyone,
It's been a long time since I posted. Things were going well for me (or so I thought). Finished Folfox on the 7th of Oct., got a clean bill of health on the 20th and so decided to go on the truck with my husband Bob (he's an OTR driver in the western states). Had a beautiful time until a week ago when I started having pain in my right side. I knew of an ovarian cyst on the left that was scheduled to come out on Dec. 3rd. I was told that it was nothing to worry about, all tests came back NED.
We barely made it to KS, never even went home, went straight to the ER, Dr's there were discussing emergency surgery, decided to wait until the next day. During Surgery they removed a tumor the size of a muskmellon (all cancer), they also gave me a complete hysterectomy.
The next day I was told that I had more than a week, but less than a year. (How's that for pinning them down?)
We are still reeling from everything, it happened so fast, I can't get my brain around it.
I talked to my previous Onc. then also got a 2nd opinion from a different Onc. Both were pretty well telling the same thing.
I'm home now, trying to sort this mess out.
I'm angry at how this cancer could grow so fast and undetected while a was on chemo, have totally lost faith in my old onc. even though the new guy told me that it was just "bad luck", nothing anybody did wrong.
My husband is very supportive, of course he is also very upset, he had a melt-down yesterday, it was so hard to watch.
Please give me some positive thoughts, maybe even some ideas on where to go from here, I'm totally devastated, don't know where to turn.
Thanks for listening to my ramblings, I'm looking forward to your letters, I've read so much good advice here.
Regine

MJay's picture
MJay
Posts: 132
Joined: Aug 2004

I certainly can understand your frustration at this new discovery. How can this happen???? How can a tumor grow this big this fast when you were just going through chemo? I would have tons of questions myself not to mention a lot of anger. Are they telling you there is nothing they can do? Do they have a game plan? "Bad Luck" doesn't sound like much confidence to me. I would have to seek out another onc to get a third opinion. Someone not related in anyway to the other two.

In the mean time keep positive thoughts and stay strong. Positive attitudes do wonders for self healing.

Good luck and my prayers are with you. MJay

spongebob's picture
spongebob
Posts: 2600
Joined: Apr 2003

Regine -

I agree with MJay... unbelievable; and "bad luck" sounds lame at best.

Tyry to keep you positive thoughts and attitude; it is you most important weapon. Know that you are in my thoughts and prayers.

Hang tough - fight.

- SpongeBob

jana11
Posts: 708
Joined: May 2004

I agree - fight like never before, BUT also save time to do things you love with the people you love. Stress reduction is SOOO important during these times AND stress can do serious damage to you mentally and physically.

We will be thinking of you, please keep us posted. jana

andreae
Posts: 238
Joined: Sep 2003

Dear Regine,

I am so sorry about recent events. I cannot even imagine your range of emotions... The shock, despair, anger... Unfortunately, this is the mess you are faced with. I can understand your speculation and thoughts as to how this could have happened, but you will never know. I think you will just have to let it go and focus on the given situation. I don't know your history, but have the doctors run tests to see if the cancer has moved to your liver/lungs? Did they completely resect the tumor during surgery? What kind of therapy have they suggested? It seems to me that they need to assess the spread of the disease and determine a course of action. When combined with monoclonal antibodies (Avasin and Erbitux), chemo can overcome resistance. Have you tried the chemo CPT-11? The Avastin/CPT-11 combination is doing spectacular things in trials. Although it is not a cure, the average length of survival is way over a year. Do not let the doctors tell you how long you have to live.

You must be rocking and reeling. My heart goes out to you and your husband. At this worst possible time, however, you have to try to pull yourselves together and determine a game plan. When they initially found my metastases, I did not want to believe it and crawled into bed. But when my oncologist told me that he wanted to do nothing, I realized that I had to snap into action. Eighteen months later, I am going for a remission.

Find a doctor you want to work with and determine suitable therapies. I hope you are recovering in body and spirit because you are in for a fight, but there is hope. Good luck and keep us posted.

Hugs,
Andrea

2bhealed's picture
2bhealed
Posts: 2084
Joined: Dec 2001

((((((regine))))))

How awful to be given a "sentence". I hope you chuck it out the window.

Having read your post I have two books to recommend to you:

A Cancer Battle Plan by Anne Frahm

Spontaneous Healing by Dr. Andrew Weil

The first book is a fabulous testimonial from a woman who was sent home to "get her affairs in order" and started researching and found a cure that worked for her.

The second is a good all around encouraging book to stay in the positive.

If you have any other ideas like wanting to look into alternatives or nutrition therapy I can point you in that direction.

My heart goes out to you and your family.

peace, emily who plugs her ears to doctors who give time frames.......lalalalalalala I'M NOT LISTENING!!!

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