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How to deal?

kacie
Posts: 1
Joined: Oct 2003

I was attending college last year, when I found out my grandfather had cancer. It was very scary and I became really depressed. I wanted to come home but my parents thought that I should wait until I had a break from school. I didn't agree but they refused to let me come home. He died within a 2 weeks of finding out he had cancer. I was scheduled to come home the following week. I don't know how to deal. This has been about 9 months now. I am better than before but I still can't let it go. I used to cry everytime I saw a movie that had someone sick. Around the time my grandfather was sick my pet rat had a lump he had already had cancer and I love him but I almost completely put me over the edge. I couldn't lose both of them at the same time. He is fine it was just and abcess. I still wonder if I would have felt better if I got to see him before he died. My mother feels it wouldn't have been better because he wasn't concious most of the time the other times he couldn't remember most of my family. I still don't know what to do. I think it helps just to let it all out.

JAN22
Posts: 24
Joined: Oct 2003

SORRY FOR YOUR LOSS, IT IS HARD, BUT UNDERSTAND IT WOULD HAVE BEEN MUCH HARDER TO SEE HIM THAT WAY, IT IS BETTER TO REMEMBER HIM HOW HE WAS .

I WILL TELL YOU A TRUE STORY ABOUT MY UNCLE , HE ALSO HAD CANCER AND WE WATCHED HIM FADE AWAY, BUT WE SEEN A VERY SPECIAL EVENT BEFORE HE PAST , WE WATCHED HIM AS , TWO ANGELS IN WHITE ROBES CAME TO TAKE HIM HOME, BUT HIS SISTERS CALLED HIM BACK , HE STAYED FOR AROUND 1 MONTH AFTER THAT BUT WAS SUFFERING, HE TOLD US WHAT HE SAW . (WE HEARD HIM SPEAK TO SOMEONE THAT ,TO US WAS NOT THERE AND HIS EXPRESSIONS) THEY SAY IF YOU CALL BACK SOMEONE BACK THEY SUFFER MORE, AND IT IS SO. HE KNEW THE ANGLES WERE COMMING BACK THE DAY HE DIED, HE TOLD US IT WAS TIME TO GO NOW. YOUR GRANDFATHER IS WITH THE ANGLES AND IS SMILING DOWN ON YOU,BE HAPPY FOR HIM FOR HE IS NO LONGER SUFFERING.

AlloMan
Posts: 47
Joined: Jul 2003

We don't all have the opportunity to say goodbye to the ones we love. Of three gandparents alive during my childhood, I didn't get to say goodbye to any of them before they passed. But I did get to spend some good times with all of them growing up. You can't change the past. I'm sure your grandfather knew you loved him. Don't think about the time you DIDN'T have with your grandfather, think about the time you DID.

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