I am 4 1/2 years recovering from surgical resection of a liposarcoma. I still feel troubled by thoughts of having cancer and possible recurrences. Does anyone have any suggestions for moving beyond these feelings?
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I loved what you had to say. I feel the same. I have always been athletic (inline skating lately) and when they told me I had cancer 4/12/2002 I was so shocked. I believe it took me until today 1/17/2003 to finally break down and cry. I've been doing all the right things to stay in motion. And God has been my savior. But we are human and we need to feel what we feel. My sarcoma still has an unknown primary. I have been in limbo for almost a year without treatment, just a lot of scans and waiting...
God bless you and stay strong. Say a little prayer for me.
I am also surviving after 4 1/2 years from surgical resection for retroperitoneal liposarcoma. I've had 3 surgeries, and the last one was 2 years ago.
I too have had a difficult time moving on, having bad thoughts about recurrences. In fact, I am having my scan on Mon 12/16/02, and am getting very nervous!
You ask how to move beyond the bad feelings, etc, and my advice would be this....Let yourself feel what you need to feel, when you're feeling it, and don't try to stop yourself! Give yourself whatever time you need. You may find that you'll be having more "good" days, more often.
Also, please know that there are many Sarcoma survivors out there, and we are all in different ages/stages of treatment, and feel just like you. If you ever need a boost, we are here for you!!
Good luck, and stay busy! Plan something fun for you to look forward to.
I was diagnosed 12 1/2 years ago with a soft tissue sarcoma. Mine was originally a retroperitoneal tumor. I have undergone 10 surgeries, 3 different courses of chemotherapies, and 2 different courses of radiation. I have told you all of that, so you know I have been through numerous recurrences and am still here being a pain in the butt! I was devastated when I recurred, so I know your fear. No one can reassure us that we will never have a recurrence, but , we can survive them. I think your anxiety is expected and normal. Each day you get further from your initial diagnosis, will lessen your fears. Don't let the fear be all consuming. See a counselor, use the available therapies, whether its a drug or meditation. Cancer can allow us to learn to take care of ourselves. Do what you need to for your peace of mind. But remember, you can survive a recurrence, just like you have your initial diagnosis. I hope this has been helpful. I think there are no rules and maybe none of us will recur again.
HI, I am compelled to ask how you are now because of your name and the date you posted this message. I am a christina and you posted on my birthday! I have been surviving my cancer since 1992. AT that time I wished for at least 10 years more of life so I could help my children who were very young then. By 2001 I was at the end of all that could be done for me. Then a study drug came along and I qualified for the study. I am now looking forward to my two year cancer free anniversary. It is wonderful, but in the back of my mind I still wonder if it is really gone. My answer to myself is always the same. I can't know that answer today and I have been here before. It will be ok or it won't, so what about TODAY. I have all of today to do what ever I want, and it is a good day to be alive, so be alive.
Christina, I can not believe how much your story mirrors Mine. I too had children who at the time were 3 and 1 at the time I was diagnosed. Also I feel as though I am being chased by this demon and I decided to maybe type some words here and read the reactions from other survivors. This forum might work but when all is done I may need to seek professional help if I can not get my feelings under control. I have nightmares and premonitions that I will eventually die from this cancer. It gets me upset when I go for a follow up test and have to wait for 2 weeks for the results. Believe me I put myself through hell waiting to here that all is clear. Good Luck to you and all here and God Bless. I will pray for all.