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how do you get over it?

nisey
Posts: 2
Joined: May 2002

I can not help the anxioud feeling I get everytime I hear about someone else's Cancer coming back or dieing from a reoccurance. I will anxious all the time although my oncologist says I am fine. How do I go on with my life without constant worry??

jeancmici
Posts: 682
Joined: Feb 2001

I just read your web page and wish you many years of good health. We don't get any guarantees as to how long we will live - cancer or not. That helps me. Perhaps it will help you.

jessiejane
Posts: 2
Joined: May 2002

I just read your message. I think it is hard to "get on with it" because it stays with you each day. I used to have severe anxiety attacks after I finished my chemo treatments which doctors called post traumatic stress syndrome. I still have them occasionally, but time really has helped. Now, I am an eight-year survivor but I still think about it. But, I don't really worry about recurrance because it's not worth it. I try to enjoy each day as much as possible and find pleasure in simple things, such as cleaning up my house or eating my lunch on my deck. I find that if I make a point to enjoy myself and take pleasure in small things, it becomes a habit and next thing I know, I'm not thinking about cancer at all. It is so easy to sink into yourself and your cancer experience. Try not to let your experience become all enveloping. It is not easy, but it is possible to do.

redwoman
Posts: 9
Joined: Apr 2002

Believe it or not, it gets better. I'm a three year survivor and I still worry every time I have tests. But it gets better every time. I have a great support system and that helps alot. But most of all, it just takes time. Keep talking about it and we're all here for you.
I wish you all the best!!
Lois

britchick356
Posts: 45
Joined: Jan 2001

I'm a 6 month survivor and I have the same anxiety. We all do. Some days are worse than others. I try to be good to those around me and myself. I do the best I can for myself,nutrition,antioxodants, self exams, etc.,and staying away from the things that are proved to be cancer causing for my type of cancer. Place my faith in the God of my choosing, and GET ON WITH IT! It's about the most any of us can do. If you're not happy with your doctor,get another one. I did and it made all the difference.

banker
Posts: 321
Joined: Apr 2002

Just read your Web Page, you have a lot to live for.I am sure we all feel anxious when we hear about others, but remember each person is different. I am sure you were tested and have regular check ups.We know there are no guarantees, but that is life. If you need support, this site can help.Take good care of yourself and enjoy your children. God will take care of us all. Be grateful the cancer was found and taken care of. It gets a little easier as time goes on. Take care.... Emmi

24242
Posts: 1417
Joined: Mar 2001

We have to remind ourselves what we have control over and what we do not. We also must be aware of what that worry can do to our bodies and our souls. We all have to get through this part of our survival and it seems to be a stage we all go through. I think the best thing we can do for ourselves is be aware of the higher risk factors we have now that we have had cancer. We must be aware of the changes in our bodies so we can be our own best advocates and will know if we have new lumps and bumps or just aren't feeling well. If any of these happen and stick around more than a couple weeks that is a good indication that it is something that doctors need to look at. We have to have the knowledge so we have the power to keep ourselves safe and healthy.
Be good to yourself,
Tara24242

bullfrog13's picture
bullfrog13
Posts: 216
Joined: Apr 2002

Dear Nisey- I cant say that you ever just "GET OVER IT"-I have had a recurrance and will be on chemo for another 3 months or so.. I live with the fear -same as you, with every scan or with ever exam that SOMETHING will be there that shouldn't be.. Just know that you are not alone! I have a scan tomorrow right after my chemo treatment and will be nervous wreck till i get results back in about 10 day or so...... you just learn to deal with it I guess..it has been little over a year for now... it does get easier with each month that passes.... I have been told by my doc -point blank- that I have about 90 percent of this crap coming back again...just a matter of where and when - not if...... so I am always waitin for the other shoe to drop.... email me..if you want.. bullfroggie13@hotmail.com or ribbitfrog13@icqmail.com... we can chat on IM if you have one.. Good luck and may God bless.. Jerilyn

nasa2537
Posts: 317
Joined: Apr 2002

Hi...it is an awful feeling, isn't it? I was so anxious before my first post-treatment mammo that I almost puked right before I went. I didn't sleep well for a couple nights before. But, I have found that it helps to remind yourself that you have faith in your Dr's, and that they haven't steered you wrong yet. I relish every appointment, as it helps me to feel I'm still being active to help stop recurrence. I know some women who are on mild antidepressants...there is at least one that helps with anxiety and panic syndrome...if it is too bad, this might be an option you would want to consider. A local support group is helpful, too. I happened to find one that has a lot of older women who are from 10 to 16 year survivors, and I think about how much better treatments are now, and they are still kickin'! May I ask what stage your cancer was? I was only stage 1 so it is maybe a little easier for me to feel good about it not coming back. But, every little ache or pain, and the mind wanders to metastasis. I just try to put it out of my mind, and remeber....a good Dr. is on the other end of the phone, and they understand your fears. How often do you see your oncologist? Mine is every 4 months, and I'm also still seeing the surgeon every 6 months now. Remember that all treatment is individualized, and your Dr's did what was best for you so that the cancer would not come back. I wish I could take the anxiety away for you, but please keep in touch...I'd love to chat any time you need to. Make sure you tell your Dr's your concerns...that's what they are there for. Best wishes...Cyndi
millionairs2@aol.com

karbear
Posts: 166
Joined: Aug 2001

Nisey, I know how you feel all too well. I am almost to my one year anniversary of diagnoses and I'm petrified somedays. I will be having my first mammo since the first one ever finding out I had cancer!! I know I will be totally scared, I think its something we have to worry about forever but maybe it will get easier the more years we put behind us..I guess the best thing to do is keep all the doctor appts. and Pray !! We all are here for each other. God Bless..karin

murphy
Posts: 45
Joined: Sep 2000

Hello, I read your post and just wanted to add my 2cents..I am a breast cancer survivor, 2 years & 9 months, I understand your fears and anxietys, I beleive we all have them. It does get easier as time goes on but I think cancer changes our whole way of looking at life and I don't think I will ever not think of cancer, but the way I have found to go on is to trust in God's plan and I don't worry about what I have no control over, and concentrate on what I can control, I discovered a whole new love of life and I try to put my all into what I love, my family, gardening, reading etc. and I find I don't have alot of time to worry...Try not to compare your situtation with others because we are each different, but don't hide your fears either, talk to whom ever you feel comfortable with, join a local support group if you are comfortable with that, it helps to know that others have the same fears and concerns. I wish you all the best. Murphy

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