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my mother had a melignant brain tumor

joey1969
Posts: 2
Joined: Apr 2002

my mother had a milignant brain tumor. she has since passed on jan 2 2001. its not an easy thing to go through. my mother was very independent and didnt like being knocked down so early she was only 55. you have to give them the most possitive attitude you can. i became here home health provider the lastyear and a half of her beautiful life. i think thas what made it so hard for me. i felt like i didnt do a good job of taking care of her. i still think to this day if i had only done a better job she might still be here. i still have problems with my mother not being here. i feel like life will never get better. she was my mother and best friend. if i can help in anyway let me know. maybe by helping someone through this horrible desease will help me forgive myself for not doing a better job with my mother. have faith and be strong love joey

speciale97
Posts: 1
Joined: May 2002

I KNOW WHAT YOU'RE GOING THROUGH..DON'T EVER THINK THAT IT'S YOUR FAULT THAT YOU DIDN'T DO A BETTER JOB...YOU DID THE BEST YOU CAN....MY MOM WAS THE SAME WAY VERY INDEPENDENT...I FELT THE SAME WAY WHEN MY MOM PASSED AWAY(SEPT 1999) I FELT THAT IT WAS MY FAULT..BUT I KNEW IN MY HEART THAT I DID THE BEST I CAN...IT TAKES TIME GETTING OVER THE LOST OF A PARENT...JUST THINK ABOUT ALL THE GOOD TIMES.....CAMILLE

andrea1
Posts: 10
Joined: May 2002

Dear Joey, My mother has been diognosed with Mesothelioma. it is cancer on the outer lining of the lung. She was diognosed in March of this year and her prognoses is not very good. The doctors are giving her 6-8 months to live. I to am my mothers caregiver. I sometimes feel like i am not doing a very good job even though my mother tells me different. I don't know you but i am sure that your mother feels that you did the best that you could in taking care of her.I don't know what you are going through but if you need someone to talk to you can e-mail me at tsao@dandy.net.
Take Care Joey
Andrea

darla73072
Posts: 3
Joined: Mar 2003

My father went through the same distress you're feeling now. My mother was 64 when she passed away in November 2001. She fought the cancer for 15 years, then it spread to just below the pituitary gland and blinded her. My father would become very impatient and try to force her to do some things for herself. Which she did until she became totally bed-ridden. The fact that you were with your mother when she passed away is a wonderful gift, for you. You were allowed to do for her, the same as she did for you as an infant. By you being with her during those final days, she felt secure. How do you know that anyone else could have done a better job? You shared her pain like no stranger could, and maybe that is what you're feeling today. Don't be upset about your care of her! Her disease is what you're angry with, don't let that anger spread to doubt that you loved her.

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