Apr 18, 2002 - 1:28 pm
I was diagnosed with Non-Hodgkin's Lymphoma in September of 2000. I was sick six months prior to my diagnoses. However, my symptoms mirrored typical food allergies and I was sent to an allergist and put on Predisone several times. Finally, a third trip to my regular MD resulted in her insisting that I see another allergist. From there I had a chest x-ray done which showed a large spot on my chest. In less than three weeks time I went from working full time to having two biopsy surgeries (first one was not conclusive) and two chemo treatments. My life was turned upside down. Suddenly my life was Dr.'s visits, medications, sleeping, the phone ringing off the hook and I became a cancer victim. I felt very lucky to have the medical care that I had and during the six months of treatment I did exactly what the Dr.'s told me to do. I went to all of my appointments, took all of the medications, ate when I was supposed to and rested. Never once during my treatments did I think I wouldn't be cured. All of the medical professionals were amazed at my positive attitude.
My tumor is gone! The chemo and the radiation were successful. I have one more test that I have to do--A PET Scan next week. The trouble that I am having is making the transition from cancer patient to cancer survivor! I feel depressed all of the time. Now I reflect back to what we went through and I am in shock. I keep telling myself that the past six months was spent getting better physically and now I need to heal emotionally. I just don't know how to do that. I am so afraid the cancer will come back or that they didn't get it all. Since there is no known cause for my type of cancer I can't stop doing something to prevent it from coming back. The phone has stopped ringing. I don't have the daily attention from the Dr's anymore. My family and friends can't understand what I am going through because they have never been there before. I am finding that treatment doesn't end when the cancer is gone. There is a lot more to healing. If any of you have been where I am, please, please e-mail me here or e-mail me at Melzmommy@yahoo.com. I would really love to hear from you.