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feeling in "limbo"

cmorrisonfl
Posts: 2
Joined: Jan 2002

Hi, I am new to this site and have not reached out for support until now. Not because some might think that I am in denial, but I am afraid to hear too much negativity and sadness. After a lumpectomy and node mapping, I was diagnosed with invasive ductal breast ca. I am 32 and have an 18 mos. old daughter and was not all that surprised. I have been finding lumps for quite some time now. It wasn't until I started Chemo. and began to feel ill that reality settled in. I am half way through chemo and will go on to have radiation treatments next. I feel as though the waiting game has begun. Wait to finish chemo, wait to finish radiation and wait to see if it recurs!!!!!!

24242
Posts: 1417
Joined: Mar 2001

Yes we all feel sometimes our life is in limbo after fighting the fight of our lives. I was well into my survival years when I finally found this place of support and plenty of understanding. I just didn't feel comfortable going to a support group so didn't. I can see now that I might of missed many opportunities to come to grips with all that I have been left.
I was 36 a mother of a teen when I was diagnosed with stage 3 bc with plenty of lymphnode involvement. For me the reality of breast cancer has always been there, fresh in mind, even though it had nearly been 20 since I lost my paternal grandmother to her reoccurance.
I think you will find that this posting board is a place for us to dump or pain and fears sometimes but mostly it is used for encouragement. We all have our times of self indulgance as you can see from some of my posts but we still must shake it all of and put one foot in front of the other. One step at a time.
Be good to yourself FIRST,
I welcome you and am so happy you too found this site.
Tara24242

jmears
Posts: 270
Joined: Jul 2001

Dear "Limbo"
What sticks with me most ... once the treatment is over and the toxins leave your body you will be amazed how good you feel... it's like the treatment sneaks up on you so you don't really know how bad you may feel but when it's done WOW!!! So ... don't wait ...look forward ... makes some plans and hug that baby!! Good luck, Jamie

ktinkey
Posts: 173
Joined: Mar 2001

Welcome.

We are all here for each other. I daresay that all of us have had the feelings you are having now. It is so nice to be able to talk with other women who have gone through or are going through the same things. I was 35 when I was first diagnosed with BC Stage1. Then, it recurred in 99 this time Stage IV. God has blessed me and healed me and I am still here to hopefully give encouragement to others. Remember, you can beat this thing. Cancer is not a death notice. I was in a support group for a litle while after my first diagnosis. It does really help to see other women are out there fighting this battle and winning!!

I agree with the other women. Once you are through treatment, you will feel great! It takes time to sort through this disease and time to heal emotionally. Allow yourself time to heal and don't beat yourself up if you need some help. We are here for each other. Most of the time we try to be positive and let the negative go. Once you are through treatment, don't dwell on the "what ifs", concentrate on all the "why nots". Hug that baby girl. Be good to yourself, so you can be good to others.

God Bless,
Kathy

maud
Posts: 183
Joined: Nov 2001

Welcome,
I am glad you found this site,it is truly a blessing to be able to share with others who have been where you are and know just what you are going thru. I only found this site in Oct. and it has been a great encouragement to me.Alot of us have web pages so you can also check those out.I know the chemo is no fun but you will get thru it take one day at a time and be good to yourself you deserve it.Give lots of hugs to that baby girl I am sure she is the apple of your eye. Just remember we are all here for you and I will keep you in my prayers.
God Bless
Debbie

maud
Posts: 183
Joined: Nov 2001

Welcome,
I am glad you found this site,it is truly a blessing to be able to share with others who have been where you are and know just what you are going thru. I only found this site in Oct. and it has been a great encouragement to me.Alot of us have web pages so you can also check those out.I know the chemo is no fun but you will get thru it take one day at a time and be good to yourself you deserve it.Give lots of hugs to that baby girl I am sure she is the apple of your eye. Just remember we are all here for you and I will keep you in my prayers.
God Bless
Debbie

shirlann
Posts: 235
Joined: Oct 2001

Hi, dear girl, you are in the phase that is the hardest. Believe me, it gets much better as the months go by. We are a sisterhood of many, and all of us pray for you and are out here rooting for you. By the way, radiation is NOTHING when compared to chemo, so that is good. Keep good thoughts, don't use any vitamin supplements while on treatment and stay in touch with us. Love, Shirlann

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