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Feeling blue and also excited!!

karbear
Posts: 166
Joined: Aug 2001

Hello, I just finished chemo, had my port removed and I'm on tamoxifen for five years. I have not had any real bad side effects(besides hot flashes) and consider myself very lucky to be done with it all.I find myself tired still but other than that I feel great. I am looking forward to going on with life cancer free!! I have noticed lately that I have thought alot of about the ordeal I had gone through and I have days where I just want to cry still. At the time of all this I was super strong and didnt' really think to much about it all,Just concentrated on getting through surgery and chemo. I think of all the wonderful family and friends I had, the wonderful support, then I think of the friends that didnt' keep posted , alot of them called when I was first diagnosed and I haven't heard from them in months, they don't even know I'm done! The surgeon told me that this happens and that this whole ordeal will tell you who your friends really are!! It really bothers me though that if it was the other way around and they were sick I would never think of not calling them,I considered them all my friends, but I try to not let it bother me so cause I want to concentrate on staying healthy. Just needed to vent. I wish you all the best of health. God Bless!!

kat02
Posts: 76
Joined: Nov 2001

Karin,

Congratulations on completing your chemo!!! Just think No more migraines! You are about to start your New Journey Cancer Free.

By the way, one of my so-called best friends refuses to see me until I am healthy again.She just can't see me this way. I just try to remember that she and I cope differently. Like you, I could never imagine abandoning her.

God Bless

Laura

cruf
Posts: 931
Joined: Oct 2000

Hi Karin. Congratulations on completeing your chemo. You Made it! Now you can go on with your life! Don't be too angry with your friends. Sometimes people just don't know what to say or how to act around people who are ill. Sometimes it's a way of escaping the unknown. Try to forgive! Life's too short to be angry! Contact them now and let them know you're fine and moving on. If they are true friends, they will respond again. Good luck. Let us know what happens. Stay well! Have a Happy Holiday! HIGS!! Cathy

pamtriggs's picture
pamtriggs
Posts: 408
Joined: Sep 2000

Dear Laura

Try to forgive your friend who will not see you. Some people just cannot cope with cancer. They do not know what to say & they feel there is nothing they can do. Some - like my sister - are scared despite all the knowledge to the contrary that they can catch cancer. My sister was afraid to touch my mother when she was dying of stomach cancer & only handled her with rubber gloves on. It hurt mum a lot I know. As I have cancer too this has only reinforced my sisters belief that it is where I caught the cancer despite the fact that I have had mine for 20+ years. So try to understand & be strong & get on with your life. This disease certainly tells who our true friends are. Love to you all.

Pam

maud
Posts: 183
Joined: Nov 2001

Hi,Hooray your done with chemo and port out to what a blessing. I finished chemo one year ago Nov.15 and they just took my port out a few weeks ago. Sounds like you are doing well. I know it is hard when your friends don't seem to understand or maybe they are scared who knows.WE are here for you anytime . May God Bless You Debbie

jmears
Posts: 270
Joined: Jul 2001

It's always good news when each phase of the treatment is complete. My favorite hurdle was getting the cahteter out ... I had a couple infections in the site and the nurses couldn't drae blood from it after a couple months (it still took the chemo) so I was so excited to have it out ... and don't you know even that had a complication ... the line snapped when the surgeon was tugging and the 20 minute removal turned into an hour and a half mini sergery! BUT ... it's OUT!!! Your feelings of crying are familiar to me ... I took antidepressants for a couple months to stablize myself ... I still a little fragile but much better ... and finally .... sorry to hear about your friends ... I was actually the one who pushed my friends away because I was so exhausted ... after treatments and work and my family ... I didn't have anything left ... so I have to mend bridges. Anyway ... good luck! Enjoy! Jamie

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