i posted on "emotional support", perhaps i should have posted here.
i am the caregiver to my mother, i have no brothers/sisters to share this load with.
my mother is a very difficult person to deal with under normal circumstances. she just had surgery to remove vulvar cancer & now is being sent for mri of pelvis for continuing pain. this pain was the reason she sought doctors for relief from.
she does not take meds as she should & argues with me constantly about it. i'm tired of arguing, feelings of despair are ongoing for me. i don't want to argue with her, but she engages me in arguing over every little thing. i need help coping with her.
her sisters & i all feel she has not come to terms with the fact that she has cancer. she acts as though she is fine & will be up and around again soon. i'm rambling, sorry. i need help coping. thanks
Joined: Jul 2001
Well, don't feel like the only one out there. I have a brother, 2 aunts and an uncle that are "trying to help" my mom. How does my uncle and aunt help? They don't let mom see or talk to her friends!!!!! They go along with everything that she says, even if it's wrong!
Unfortunately, she's in that extremely anxious stage, and had a psychotic episode tonight and made me go home (she ran away to the next door neighbors house). She is claiming I am trying to hurt/harm her and that the sitters I have hired are not giving her the medicine right. We have had to hide her medicine because they found her raiding it. My aunt is "going along" with her, just to make her calm down. Frankly, this is just making it worse, especially when I will have to go back over there.
The family is refusing to take my advice and bring in psych-nurses for her. They can and do help tremendously! They not only help the patient, but you cope as well. They "don't want people to think she's crazy and belongs in an institution!" What a crock!
My mom has end stage cancer. She was diagnosed just 3 months ago. There is no help available for her, but she refuses to believe it. She thinks there is some treatment out there that will help. I think that, like your mom, she refuses to come to grips with what's going on.
My mom is crying a lot. The psych meds they have her on are not working. She has had some "good days", but the bad are horrible. She refuses to go back to the "hospice" as that's a place people go to die. She received much help there, and liked it until the anxiety set in.
I feel for you, and just like you, it's all I can do to cope. I want to scream sometimes it's so bad.
Take care...