Jun 07, 2001 - 6:13 pm
I am lucky enough to have met a very supportive, caring man in the midst of my treatments. I was hesitant to tell him about my illness, but we felt so comfortable with each other that I thought it was okay. Through his support I was comfortable being sexually intimate with him despite my radiation burns on my breast. Unfortunately for him, this month was the first time he was witness to the emotional ups and downs that I experience when I have chemo treatments. This last month was particularly traumatic for me because I lost my hair. I went through CMF and AC treatments without losing any hair, however now I am taking Taxol and two weeks after my first treatment my hair started falling out. I was devastated and depressed about it for a couple of weeks. At the time, my friend was out of town and could only listen to my hysterics. Now that he's back home, he says that he is very worried about me and as a result he has no sexual desire. This is a man who has no trouble talking about sex and clearly enjoys it, but now he say that he doesn't think about it at all. He said that it was difficult to know what I was going through and I suppose he didn't know how to help me. Now, I feel like he's turned off to me and that bothers me alot at a time when my feelings about my femininity are so precarious. How can I help him to feel more comfortable with intimacy as I go through this. I feel like intimacy (and that doesn't always means sex) is very important to me right now. Any suggestions?