Cancer Survivors Network - Hospice brought in - Comments

Well said!

grandmafay — Mon, 12 Oct 2009 21:26:49 -0400

Well said! Fay

Patty

newbride — Mon, 12 Oct 2009 20:54:46 -0400

Patty so sorry to hear about Jack. We just called and made arrangements for hospice for my husband as well. The tumors are just getting bigger and bigger and the chemo/radiation did not work at all, there is nothing more they can do.

I never in a million years would have thought that I would have to plan a wedding and funeral in the same year! How totally depressing!

But the one thing that helps me get through is a line from the movie Steel Magnolias ---
"I would rather have 30 minutes of Wonderful, than a lifetime of nothing special"

Life's Not Fair

grandmafay — Mon, 12 Oct 2009 13:50:45 -0400

I used to tell my kids, "Life's not fair." You know when they were going through that stage when everything was "not fair." It really isn't! I am so sorry that you have this added burden. My Mom had shingles and I know that the meds for it are much better than they used to be. I'll pray for you to have a mild case, but you do need to take care of yourself. I know: easier said than done. Ask Hospice for help with this, too. You are strong, but it's ok to show some weakness now and then. Remember we really aren't Superwoman, just darn close. Fay

now it has affect my health

pattynonews — Sun, 11 Oct 2009 15:47:46 -0400

With all the stress I have been under I got a break out of shingles, Im hoping it is a very mild case, I looked it up and it can be caused by stress, and of course since I quit my job I have no inusrance, I know they treat it with steriods and pain meds so Jack has alot so I might have to self medicate but I hear it is very painful, and now I have to be careful Jack does not get it, his sister bandage all the blisters up so nothing is spread, why why now, he is restng comfortable, and this has to happen, And hopefuly friday we will know if the cancer has spread, or it is just an infection, I do like the hospice nurse she was very nice, and I do not know how I am going to deal with the pain of shingle ( i dont do pain well ) Jacks cancer and his dad , I want to tell god my plate is full, Im so itchy, I have ice which seems to stop the burning, But Im going to try and stay strong
Patty

Patty, Sorry to hear

junklady — Sun, 11 Oct 2009 10:36:57 -0400

Patty, Sorry to hear about Jack. I must be very difficult for you at this time, with all the emotions and stress going on. I have no perfect words of comfort, but know that I am thinking about you both. Someday I will be where you are and I am so sad. When I think about the road ahead, all I do is cry. I have a journal that I write in everyday to vent, it seems to help some. I don't have any close friends to talk to. Our friends say if you need to talk just call. I can't. They have no idea of what we are going through, what could they possibly say? Little daily projects help some to keep my mind off Dale's illness. We just take one day at a time and try to make the most of it. Every little thing counts. Every morning when I get up, I say to myself "be strong". That's all I can do. I hope you will find some way too. Take care.

I am tired

CherylMike — Sun, 11 Oct 2009 00:54:45 -0400

Hello. I am new to this site, but have been going through head and neck cancer with my husband for 2 years. He has been through numerous chemos, radiation and test trials. For the past 3 weeks he has slept. He only wakes up for doctor appointments or when I give him his medicine. He has started hallucinating (tonight he came out of the bedroom, dressed and ready to go see a show). This is just heartbreaking for me. He is skin and bones and is in so much pain (the metastis to his bones is incredibly painfull - he had several fractured ribs). He is on painkillers, but they just make him sleep (that and the liver tumors). He was scheduled to have a pain pump put in this coming week, but his white cell count is too high. The doctor thinks it is from the tumors being infected. He had a CT scan Friday, and depending on the results, will go in this week and have the tumors lanced. I took a long walk yesterday (my in-laws are taking turns sitting with my husband) with my 13 year old and my dogs. It felt really good. I also cleaned the house (with my favorite CD playing) and cried while mopping. Believe it or not, I actually felt better. This is just something that people cannot understand. It is really good to "talk" to someone who is experiencing this. Thank you~

Im just numb

pattynonews — Sat, 10 Oct 2009 22:56:43 -0400

Im am in the numb stage, The nurse was very nice, I will still be able to be hs primary caretaker, I have all of these books to read and just cant seem to pick up one, Im watching Jack and Im just so sad, Im not sure he quite understand what is going on, he has alot of anixety, and Im trying to talk him through it, but how do I talk him through it , if I dont know how to talk myself through it, He is very quiet,so I am giving him his space, I sure use someone to talk to , but all my friends are in florida, and they all say we know what you are going through, but I dont even know what I am going through how can they know, Im trying to keep postive, and any one has any advice on how I am to get through this, I would love some in put

zombie...

SonSon — Sat, 10 Oct 2009 21:05:06 -0400

Oh, patty - I KNOW what you are going through... the first week after my mother-in-law came home from the hospital on hospice care I was a zombie. Did not shower for a week (pee-yew).
Be kind to yourself, take advantage of the relief of hospice care services and remind yourself that you are doing all the right things.
Hopefully after a few days or a week you can start to refocus and try to enjoy some moments with Jack again.
Fatima

Hospice brought in

pattynonews — Sat, 10 Oct 2009 17:18:26 -0400

Well Jack was sent home and said there was not much more they can do for him, we will go see his regular oncologist next friday so hopefully we will have some answers, They sign him up for hospice, they made there first visit today, it was sad, I am num right now, not sure what do to or how to feel, Is this just a set back or the finally stage