Cancer Survivors Network - My mom died :( - Comments

I am sorry

teenadee — Wed, 09 Nov 2011 18:38:39 -0500

god I am so sorry for your loss. I know you are asking to help you deal but I am losing my mom to Cancer as well. Although I am much older than you, it is the hardest thing in my life as my mom is everything to me as well. All I can tell you is I wish god helps you deal with this pain and heartache. I hope you have people around you that truly love you and can comfort you. God bless you.

Sorry

grandmafay — Tue, 08 Nov 2011 12:45:00 -0500

I am sorry for your loss. I know those words don't help much, but as you said, it's good to know you are not alone. Your mother will always be with you as long as you remember her. So always. You will be able to share her with others by sharing those memories. One thing I learned from my husband's battle and death from cancer was how important memories are. As a mother and grandmother, my goal is to leave as many memories as possible. Your mother raised you to be strong and loving. Memories will help guide you in the future. You are her legacy and you will make her proud! Take care, Fay

i am 20.. my mom passed from cancer

bubblegumx3 — Tue, 08 Nov 2011 11:23:21 -0500

i get so jealous when I see "complete" families.. you know, the families with a mom, dad, and two or three kids. i always took my family for granted. now that my mom passed away from liver cancer within two months of diagnoses, my family is broken. i never thouught my mom would not be there when i get my first serious boyfriend, get married, have children. the only thing keeping me going is knowing that my mom is in a better place playing golf with god everyday, pain free, and that many others are going through what i did so i am not completely alone.

time heals

fik2010 — Wed, 06 Apr 2011 02:40:00 -0400

Hi I am so sorry to hear about your mom.I am 30 and lost my mom 1 year ago to gallbladder cancer after only 10 weeks after finding out she had it so yes I feel your pain.One thing that helps me is knowing shes in heaven and not in anymore pain it was a very hard time when she was sick.There are still times when I want to pick up the phone and call her to ask a question but realize shes not there and to this day I still have days that I just cry thinking about her and missing her but prayers helps me get through it.I will keep you in mine and I know its hard but try to stay strong.

time heals

fik2010 — Wed, 06 Apr 2011 02:39:57 -0400

Love it

MzzKimba2002 — Sun, 06 Mar 2011 22:42:15 -0500

Thank you for posting this beautiful poem. These words are so true and very helpful when we focus so much on the loss of a loved one, that we actually forget that they did "live". I am a mother who lost her oldest child (Wendy) at the young age of 37. She was a mother of 3 herself. After collapsing and being put on life support for about 6 hours, she passed. What we found out afterwards from a autopsy was she had undetected ovarian cancer that had spread to her brain. She did not show any signs of any illness. As you can imagine, this was a complete shock to the family. This was in 2006. Since then, i too have been diagnosed (Nov 2010) with limited small cell carcinoma. I am doing pretty good considering. After 25 radiation treatments and 4 cycles of chemo (3 days a week, off 2 weeks, my cancer is in full remission. I am blessed!!!! Again thank you!!!

mom

mamas123 — Sun, 06 Mar 2011 10:09:57 -0500

Hi, I just lost my mom two weeks ago as of yesterday. She died February 19, 2011, so I know what you are going through and I know what you mean by "my whole world is upside down." Although I am a bit older than you 27, its still too young to lose a mom. My mom had cervical cancer when I was 19 and I remember it vaguely, just that they removed it with a simple procedure. I have a 12 year old and 10 month old twins (my mom is also a twin). I remember asking why she was getting so skinny (in 09) and never really got an answer and than when I was about 4 months pregnant(Jan 2009) we found out that the cancer returned, we thought it was stage 1 but turned out it was stage ivb mets to lungs. I didn't even know it was stage iv until a couple of months ago. She lived for a little over a year from being diagnosed, which to me is a blessing and a miracle because usually people don't live that long. She actually was going into remission May of 2010 but complications with her kidney stopped the chemo in August and than at the end of Oct 2010 we found out it got worse than what she started, mets to the liver. The last couple of months were the hardest and I never gave up hope until that last week. My mom was so strong and I hate that she will miss the rest of my children's lives and mine too. It hurts more because I have a 10 year old brother and my dad is taking it really bad. It also hurts to see other people with their mom, I think that will pass in a while but the hurt won't. What comforts me is that my mom lived with me the last 5 months of her life and I got to see her everyday. She did try chemo again and radiation but it didn't work. Sometimes I feel like I needed to to do more and ask more questions. I was so scared when we first found out but I was pregnant with a high risk pregnancy and buying a new house so I thought everything was under control. I visited my mom almost everyday after finding out about the cancer as well as going with her to chemo. I hope that you find my story a little helpful since there are others going through the exact same thing.

Hello

Cindy Bear — Wed, 26 Jan 2011 19:17:35 -0500

I am so sorry to hear this. You are so young.. I lost my mom to uterine cancer about 18 mos ago and I am still reeling from the pain. Everything seemed to happen so quickly, the diagnosis, she was incredible pain one night, my sister took her to hospital, they admitted her, she died that same day. Like you I take comfort that she's in no more pain, no more fever or nausea, no more endless tests and treatments " It's very difficult I know, but you will be okay. Just try to take one day at a time and know that it's okay to grieve, to cry, to swear, to throw things... I still cry.. not every day but often.. and I'm alot older than you. Hugs, Cindy

my mom die of "metastatic lung cancer" stage 3

dmack_x0x0 — Tue, 25 Jan 2011 08:47:13 -0500

im 19 yrs old and i lost my mom DEC 19 2010 and i just feel so lost with out her my whole world is upside down .. she was diagnose in may she won cancer five different times so i was sure this was just a scary she seem soo strong until about Nov it just went down hill i was with her every step of the way the last week she lived we was home and she said call 911 i cant take this pain anymore that was Monday && that Sunday she died ={.. in my heart i know she's in a better place because shes not in pain no more but that doesn't heel my heart when i am around people i still feel alone i cry everyday ...

I can relate...my mom died 7 months ago

LinJL — Tue, 28 Dec 2010 15:53:06 -0500

Hi everyone. Unfortunately, I can relate. My mom died 7 mos. ago from lung cancer. She was 68...too young. She was my very best friend, my touchstone, my confidante. We had that mother/daughter connection. Today is my birthday and its my first one without her. I'm having a hard time. I miss her more than I could ever say. Its like a piece of me has been ripped out. I know you all understand that feeling. I'm going out to dinner tonight with family and friends and I'm going to try to enjoy it, but I always feel this sadness deep inside even when I'm laughing, its weird. I have gotten a couple signs from her since she died and that has helped. I know she is at peace now. I hope someday we can all find peace without our mothers here...God bless.

strong

Gary510 — Sat, 18 Dec 2010 19:18:23 -0500

hi my name is gary @ snow girl311 . i can relate to you . my mother allso passed away from pancreatic cancer it brings tears to my eyes writing this cuz i never really wrote about it . it was 2007 july 7 / about 3 years ago . i was only 23 years old . i took care of my mom she was my best friend so i can under stand where your pain is .I find i think about ther everyday and i use to just be depressed, but now i try to honor her. its hard . i would say stay strong and stay level headed, and don't drink to num the pain cuz, if you can handle this loss and stay positive you can help some one in your shoes in the future ! LESS THAN TWO YEARS AFTER MY MOM HAD PASSED MY FATHER HAD A MASSIVE STROKE. SOMETIMES I ASK GOD why he put me through these things, but we all have to go thru them in our life just some sooner than others !

Sorry for your loss

msnumom — Wed, 17 Nov 2010 16:01:52 -0500

Hi Hollyanne, I too have lossed my mom and the lonliness and heart break that I feel each and everyday is unbelievable. My mom was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer the day after Thanksgiving in 2006. She was in so much pain prior to going to the doctor, but she never liked to go to the doctor. Not sure that anything would be any different if she had been diagnosed any earlier. My mom did not want any treatment so I honored that even though I wanted to be selfish and have her undertake the treatment, but I loved her so much that I truly told her to make the decision without guilt. I had just gotten married (the second time) in October. From the day of diagnosis until the time of her passing was three months. I stayed with my mom and dad every day/night and took care of her. I would not have traded that time for anything. It was awful to watch her suffer and it was awful to watch her die. I have two children. My children and myslef were the highlight of my mom's life. She loved us with everthing she had. My oldest was 12 1/2 and she passed on my youngest 7th birthday, which was two days before her 65th birthday. I can remember my little guy asking his grandma if she was going to be here for his birthday and she promised that she would be. On his birthday, I returned from his school after taking cupcakes and a special lunch to him and she passed 10 minutes after I told her that he had his treats. She held on for 63 days without food or water.........who does that? Sorry to ramble on about this, but I hope that knowing that there are others out there facing the very same thing that you are might help. I amazed at how I can still be so sad and disheartened almost everyday. I put on a good front for my children, but deep down in my heart, I ache and ache and ache. I spoke to my mom everyday two or three times a day. She always wanted the boys over and loved them immensly. Oh, I love the memories, but will never be able to get past the loss of my mom. I just take one day at a time and hope that it gets me through the day. i do allow myself to cry and cray and cray when it happens. May you have a blessed day :)

This is an awesome

lilli1020 — Fri, 12 Nov 2010 20:12:44 -0500

This is an awesome poem....it puts a whole new spin on all the other things you hear from most people that have experienced a profound loss. Thanks for posting it.

Gayle

My mom passed away on May 10 this year too

england — Sat, 06 Nov 2010 09:25:12 -0400

Hi My mom died after a brave battle with breast cancer too only this past May and Im 49. No matter what age this happens you gonna feel like an orphan thats the only way I can describe the feeling. My mom was my best friend too and I tried to help her fight that beast the best that I could but it didnt matter the beast one. When I get down which is alot still I think of her and how sick she was and I tell myself it would have been selfish to keep her here for me. Its never gonna go away but we will realize that our lives have changed forever we dont ever forget about our moms but we both know in our hearts that they would never want us to feel sad. I go outside on my porch every night cry my eyes out and talk to her, she is the brightest star in the sky and I ask her to let me know somehow that she hears me! You know there have been alot of my prayers answered lately. Im not religious I do believe in God but some of the things that have happened just blow me away sometimes. I had a pug that was so sick we didnt think he was gonna make it. His trachia closed up from phenomia so bad at times his tongue and lips were purple. I took him outside one night when he couldnt breath and asked my mom to help. I was afraid he was going to die in my arms. By the next day he was 75% better and totaly recovered in 3 days. The vets told me that it was his whole trechia and there was nothing that could be done but antibiotics. My mom was an avid animal lover and use to go one real rescues with me and help me with the rescue dogs. I know in my heart she is there watching over me and I know your mom is watching over you to. You just have to take time alone to talk to her and tell her how you are feeling and believe me your prayers will be answered. Mom knows best, mom kisses all booboos and makes them better and your mom will help you through this you just have to ask.

Thank you!

Tina Blondek — Thu, 18 Mar 2010 18:02:19 -0400

Dear EmB,
I lost my dad, Ray to cancer on 3/9/10. This poem will be a wonderful thing to share with my family.
I will just have to fit in "he" and "his".
Tina

My mom died :(

snowgirl311 — Mon, 06 Oct 2003 19:51:30 -0400

I am 22 years old and my mother died of pancreatic cancer just a week ago. She was the young age of 41. My mom was battling for almost two years, but I can't handle the loss. I love her more than anything. She was my whole life, my best friend. Now I feel like half of my world is gone. Can someone please help me deal? :(