Cancer Survivors Network - Comments

My own set

Marlene_K — Fri, 20 Nov 2009 18:48:31 -0500

My salon also gave me my own set. I bring it with me every time I go. I think it's a great idea and plan to always do that. It IS smart when you think about it!

Thank you...

MinnieMN — Fri, 20 Nov 2009 18:47:24 -0500

Hi Teri,

Thank you so much for posting. I just read your post, and it hit a cord and made me cry. I'm not sure what it was you said, but you hit something in me. That's what I'm looking for-a lifeline-plain and simple. Everything seems so deppressing. I deal with despair everytime my eyes are open, which I suppose would explain my tendency to keep them closed. I want so badly to find something to excite me and make me happy-something to get me going-something to help me ENJOY the time I have left on this Earth. I believe I have a limited time. It keeps hitting me in the face that my "functional" time is getting less and less. However, I have sunk into such a depressed state that I think that I want things to move on, because what's left will be pain. But I don't want to be that way. I'm not suicidal, don't think that. It's just that...I've been thinking about heaven and things like that, and this seems better than what I'm going through right now. But I know I need to fight hard, which I am...fighting. The hardest thing that I'm fighting is the sadness-the fear of what's going to happen next and what it will feel like. I don't want to be like this. I am going to see a bunch of doctors next week-I will be at the hospital on Monday morning. I'm going to tell them how I feel and that I want a therapist, someone to help me deal emotionally. I have a fear of mental health doctors-I don't want the men in white jackets to come get me-and I like having control-I don't like any decision making abilities to be taken away from me. I believe I have deserved that- to decide what treatment I want and don't want. Anyways, let me reiterate that I am not suicidal nor a danger to anyone, so don't nobody call anybody. What I'm trying to say is that I'm just depressed, and I'm dying literally with an illness, and it's hard. It's just hard and scary. I think I'm greiving my own life. Does that make sense? I need a friend, someone that doesn't mind reading depressing emails like this-I have to get it out and need someone to listen. I'm like Teri, my friends have families and care, but it's not like a family member. I have family, but they have been abusive, and they wouldn't be supportive. I love my parents, but there's history. Long story. Would anyone care to be an e-mail buddy? I can take my blackberry into the hospital :)

VickiSam

tommaseena — Fri, 20 Nov 2009 18:47:20 -0500

Still thinking of you. thoughts and prayers are still coming your way.

Hugs,
Margo

YES!

cruf — Fri, 20 Nov 2009 18:47:13 -0500

I didn't join in to the Secret Santa for no reason other than I'm lazy but I have to say, I'm so excited waiting with all of you for that special box. I would love to hear who the Secret Santa is for everybody and what the ornament looks like. How about a picture of them over the names so everyone can see them and enjoy them together. Just a suggestion. HUGS!! Cathy

No THIS

Marlene_K — Fri, 20 Nov 2009 18:46:10 -0500

I was never told! I got rid of my tips and have just a thin coat of filler put on the top with just a clear top coat. I haven't been for a pedicure yet, as I only do those once in a while. I generally take care of my own feet, but I planned on going soon. Were you given a reason?

My Ornament

Aliaslisa — Fri, 20 Nov 2009 18:44:05 -0500

I just had a round of Chemo on Tuesday. Got a sore throat on Wed. and lost my voice on Thurs. BUT! I can still type! I got a beeeaaaauuuutiful ornament of a blond woman (like me) in a pretty, long party dress with her hands clapping to the beat of "dancing with Ned." She is dressed and coiffed as though she has a Spanish heritage (again, like me) so, she is just perfect! I don't know how I am going to top this! It was as though I was shopping with my ornament elf and she looked over my shoulder to see me admiring this one and then got it for me.

You know I will cherish this ornament from the day I got it until the day I am gone and my daughter in law and my son put it in their tree. (My 4 year old grandson just walked in and saw the ornament and said: "Is that a dancing girl?" I told him: "You bet she is dancing! For all of us! Huggs and Special Huggs for you who sent the ornament, XOXOXO. Lisa

Mimi

Marlene_K — Fri, 20 Nov 2009 18:42:35 -0500

I never realized you had the same cocktail as me! I see tons that have AC or CT but none that had Taxotere as well. Do you know why? Have you ever looked into the benefit of having all 3?

I asked my ONC. if I could

dyaneb123 — Fri, 20 Nov 2009 18:36:55 -0500

I asked my ONC. if I could have a Margarita with the girls if I wanted one and he said sure, but I probably wouldn't want it....as it turned out, he was right...everything tasted yucky to me on chemo. I have learned that wine is good for the skin while on rads though...and my taste is back... :)

Good luck on Monday. It's

Marcia527 — Fri, 20 Nov 2009 18:35:18 -0500

Good luck on Monday. It's always harder waiting for the day than actually getting there and doing something. I'll be thinking of you.

Let me know

Marlene_K — Fri, 20 Nov 2009 18:35:03 -0500

what they tell you, Tracy. I will ask my oncologist when I see him again on Tuesday. Yea, that's another thing! I have to see him EVERY week. I'm gonna go broke on co-pays. I'm also planning to ask him that. I can see going the week I have chemo and if I have a problem, but my blood work has been excellent and I haven't had a need to see him other than him telling me I'm doing excellent... for THAT I have to pay $30???

I just took comments as the

Marcia527 — Fri, 20 Nov 2009 18:31:27 -0500

I just took comments as the person was trying to be helpful. We all have said things we wish we could take back. I've inserted foot many times. Sorry you have had so many. Why-indeed. Maybe humans really do only use 10% of brain.

For the record, you would be

chenheart — Fri, 20 Nov 2009 18:28:51 -0500

For the record, you would be truly amazed at just how many teachers we have in this BC family~ it is incredible. Perhaps that is why we find ourselves here; we learn, share, read, educate and are educated!

Though a cancer diagnosis is never easy to hear, we still welcome you to the most empathetic, supportive group of women you will ever hope to meet!It has wisely been said that "you are our past and we are your future". We will hold your hand through this adventure in Beast-Killing, and sometimes, if you feel a tug, it's ony us pulling you!

Come in as often as you need or want; we are always open and you will find yourself in good company.

Hugs,
Chen♥

hello

Sam726 — Fri, 20 Nov 2009 18:25:19 -0500

Welcome to the site....i know you dont want to be here but glad you found us. Sorry to hear of your diagnosis. I too am young, 33...HER2+....no mastectomy, but having lumpectomy after xmas, once Im done with chemo. R u going to have chemo also?

Thank you

Ritzy — Fri, 20 Nov 2009 18:24:11 -0500

Thanks for the update David. Nice to meet you. Please let Jeanne know that we love her and are praying for her.

Sue :)

What is...

Marlene_K — Fri, 20 Nov 2009 18:23:17 -0500

Danactive??