My brother Paul has cancer

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Comments

  • dennis318
    dennis318 Member Posts: 349 Member
    MarineE5 said:

    Some answers to your questions
    Paulssister,

    First, let me say that I am sorry to hear that your brother has to travel this road, but as you can see, there are allot of us that have gone down the path before him and we are doing pretty good. As you mentioned, there is a wealth of information here, so do as you have already started, ask questions to find answers. I will attempt to answer some of them now.

    I too am a Base of Tongue Cancer patient/ survivor. I had part of my tongue removed and then it was reattached. I had 30 Radiation treatments without any Chemo as your brother will receive.

    I had a operation to have the Peg Tube installed at the same time as my radical neck disection and removal of the tumor on my tongue. It would be better to have the Peg tube inserted prior to radiation treatments. Paul has lumps on his neck, they are lymphnodes filtering the cancer cells. They may be removed by a neck disection as mine were. After the operation(s), there will be a 6-7 week healing period for the tissue to heal before the radiation treatments start.

    After the radiation starts, the first few weeks are not too bad, but the radiation is accumlative and the effects increase. The road gets bumpy here and after the treatments are done, it might be another 4-5 weeks before he slowly, and I mean slowly starts to recover. Each person reacts differently, I am giving you the worse case input. He might actually handle everything very well compared to some of the other patients he will see at the treatments.

    The nutrition that he will put in his Peg Tube will be as the Doctor instructs or what his insurance will pay for. The Peg is a back-up for him when his mouth gets to sore to eat orally. He will need to swallow water daily no matter what so he doesn't loose the swallow motion, this is very important, to continue to swallow daily. He needs to take in 12 times his body weight with calories. If he weighs 200 pounds, he needs 2400 calories each day to maintain his weight. The Doctors advise to gain weight before treatment, because nearly everyone loses weight during the treatments.

    50/50 chance. Don't read allot into numbers, many numbers are outdated, you can worry yourself sick looking at the odds of survival. I know, I did it at first also. Most of the numbers are based on a 5 year survival rate. I can tell you I have passed that mark. Am I able to do the same things before cancer, no, but I am able to do allot of things, we find a " New Normal ". He will get through this. I know people that were told they had 2 years to live, that was 8 years ago and they are here and going strong, so the Doctors don't know everything. They are good, but they are looking at numbers.

    Remember this, it isn't the size of the dog in the fight, it is the size of the Fight in the dog that matters.

    My Best to Both of You and Everyone Here

    You Came to The Right Place
    You came to the right place, you'll get alot of info from people who are going threw the same thing or close to it, it is not walk in the park, stick with your brother, do what you can to get him threw this, it is a rough road, Dennis
  • Scambuster
    Scambuster Member Posts: 973
    Weight Gain
    Hi Susan,

    Plenty of good advice here from your new friends. Your brother may not feel the need for these friends yet but when the going gets rough, he may change. It would be good for him to join too as passing 2nd hand information can be difficult sometimes. You will find many answers here your doctors don't have, post away as you are going through.

    On the weight gain and more importantly diet, there are several trains of thought. Most Doctors don't believe diet has much to do with our disease nor our recovery. Nearly 'all' alternative therapists do. Doctors don't study nutrition apart from 1 day in their entire training.

    In brief, i have taken to the diet and nutrition bandwagon. The basic and total thought is that we should only be eating a plant based diet and preferably raw foods. This means fruits, vegetables, salads, nuts etc. No Animal proteins at all - including dairy. It also means eliminating all junk foods, fried foods and processed foods. You will need to do your own research on this (or your brother will) as it is a big shift in behavior. I figure we were doing something wrong to have got this disease, so by eliminating all the things that may have caused or contributed is a good idea: junk food, animal proteins, sweets and pastries, alcohol, smoking etc. It is also thought an acidic body promotes cancer while keeping your body alkaline, help prevent it. The above diet will do this by itself. You get the small litmus strips fm your drugstore and test his pee for the pH.

    I also believe that using supplements and vitamins to help us recover and rebuild our immune systems is critical. If the immune system is working properly, it should kill off all cancer cells before they can form 'foci' and get a hold. You can go to my 'Expressions' page for more information and couple of very god book references.

    We understand you must be processing a lot right now, but you will soon get a good grip on what is going on. Carry a notepad and write down questions and other bits of information and that will make the data collection and general management of this a little easier for you. I was knocked down for about 6 months total. I, like Steve, has it in the tonsil, so not as involved as your brother. As the guys above said, the last 3-4 weeks of treatment can get rough and also post treatment is very hard going and it may take a few months for him to get back into the game. Depression can be a devil at any time during treatment but most common as soon as treatment is over so just note that.

    Keep in touch and the gang will be here. Don't get yourself too stressed, just take each moment as it comes and deal with things as they crop up.

    Regds to you and your Bro.
    Scambuster
  • Greg53
    Greg53 Member Posts: 849

    Weight Gain
    Hi Susan,

    Plenty of good advice here from your new friends. Your brother may not feel the need for these friends yet but when the going gets rough, he may change. It would be good for him to join too as passing 2nd hand information can be difficult sometimes. You will find many answers here your doctors don't have, post away as you are going through.

    On the weight gain and more importantly diet, there are several trains of thought. Most Doctors don't believe diet has much to do with our disease nor our recovery. Nearly 'all' alternative therapists do. Doctors don't study nutrition apart from 1 day in their entire training.

    In brief, i have taken to the diet and nutrition bandwagon. The basic and total thought is that we should only be eating a plant based diet and preferably raw foods. This means fruits, vegetables, salads, nuts etc. No Animal proteins at all - including dairy. It also means eliminating all junk foods, fried foods and processed foods. You will need to do your own research on this (or your brother will) as it is a big shift in behavior. I figure we were doing something wrong to have got this disease, so by eliminating all the things that may have caused or contributed is a good idea: junk food, animal proteins, sweets and pastries, alcohol, smoking etc. It is also thought an acidic body promotes cancer while keeping your body alkaline, help prevent it. The above diet will do this by itself. You get the small litmus strips fm your drugstore and test his pee for the pH.

    I also believe that using supplements and vitamins to help us recover and rebuild our immune systems is critical. If the immune system is working properly, it should kill off all cancer cells before they can form 'foci' and get a hold. You can go to my 'Expressions' page for more information and couple of very god book references.

    We understand you must be processing a lot right now, but you will soon get a good grip on what is going on. Carry a notepad and write down questions and other bits of information and that will make the data collection and general management of this a little easier for you. I was knocked down for about 6 months total. I, like Steve, has it in the tonsil, so not as involved as your brother. As the guys above said, the last 3-4 weeks of treatment can get rough and also post treatment is very hard going and it may take a few months for him to get back into the game. Depression can be a devil at any time during treatment but most common as soon as treatment is over so just note that.

    Keep in touch and the gang will be here. Don't get yourself too stressed, just take each moment as it comes and deal with things as they crop up.

    Regds to you and your Bro.
    Scambuster

    Hi Susan
    Hi Susan,

    Where is your brother at in Missouri? I'm in St. Louis. If he's in this area and needs any assistance, he can email me directly or on here.

    I've read numerous books now and I'm in total agreement with Scam on the nutrition thing. Overall there are tons of great people on this site with lots of good info. I would suggest your brother sign up; it's well worth the time. I wish I had joined earlier.

    The only things I'd like to add is not to be afraid to get a second opinion. There are lots of qualified teams of physicians around. Also you can learn a lot here. Ask the doctors lots of questions and be well informed. Last, one of the biggest common denominators we all face after radiation is issues related to the destruction of salivary glands. There is a drug that has been discussed here (Amifostine??) that some have use that may limit the damage. I would ask about that? I did not know about it til too late.

    Good luck!
    Greg
  • Pam M
    Pam M Member Posts: 2,196
    Hi Susan
    Sorry your family's going through this. Glad you found this site. I can't tell you what a blessing the folks here have been to me (and many others). I was diagnosed with Stage 4 Base of Tongue cancer with lymph nodes involved in October. I finished my treatment in March. I did chemo and radiation - no surgery. My 6 week CAT scan showed no tumors remaining (I started with three). I'll have more detailed tests at the end of the month.

    The lack of or reduction of saliva most all of us experience is why there's concern for the teeth. Saliva helps remove the organisms from our teeth that promote decay. Since we have decreased protection, we're given other tools to help protect our teeth (special toothpastes, rinses, flouride treatments, etc.). I was also told to have my teeth cleaned every 4 months instead of 6. Most people do not go through loss of jaw bone, luckily.

    It is wonderful that you're able and willing to go to Paul to help him through this ordeal. I'm sure that will really make a difference in his treatment journey. Bless you both.

    - Pam
  • Paulssister
    Paulssister Member Posts: 30
    Kimba1505 said:

    Hard words to hear
    Susan, Some of the hardest words I have ever heard were "it's cancer". The blood ran out of my head, I was as white as a sheet, and had to put my head down for 10 minutes so I would not have to be picked up off the floor when the pathologist shared with me and my partner that he had cancer. Hearing the news of your brothers cancer I am sure is frightening. We all have our preconcieved ideas of what cancer is. You have just tapped into the most valuable resource there is for surviving the psychological effects of cancer. As you have read from all who have responded so far, there are people here who have had what your brother has. They know every detail of the fight to survive this cancer. What you will also learn is it is survivable. My partner was diagnosed in April and the first ENT threw out all of these bleak statistics about survival that were very general in nature and not specific to Mark, or the nuances of his cancer. We were alarmed until we met with a doctor who treats Head and Neck cancer ALL the time. Those percentages shot up to the 85-90% range.
    Mark just started the chemo/radiation part of treatment after super surgery phase and his started in his tonsil. We all travel this road and learn a lot; as a result we can offer information and support. Those here who have had base of the tongue primary and/or have gone from A to T (I don't say Z because you will learn this is something that is always a part of life and there is no Z) with treatment will give you the most information relevent to your brother's journey. Stay with us, regardless which state you are in (geographically or menatlly). There is always someone here.
    I am impressed with the relationship that exists between you and your brother that you would pick up your life in Florida and go to him as he faces this phase of his life. To not be alone is HUGE, for all of us.
    My best to both you and Paul,
    Kim

    Kim...
    You read my mind. I

    Kim...

    You read my mind. I most definately had visions in my head...and they were not sugar plums. The first night, I cried my heart out because, like you said, I could only imagine the worst. However, after joining this web site, I have actually gained the knowledge that this thing can be conquered. All of you with your kind words and support have made me relax and focus on what needs to be done rather than bemoaning what could happen.

    My brother and I have always been close but the person I am most impressed with is my husband who said, go...take care of your brother. There are so many things he will have to take care of here. Luckily, nothing as urgent as Paul. I am truly blessed to have both in my life and now a wonderful support group, who feels very much like family.

    I know Mark is starting his treatments today. My thoughts and prayers are with him and you today...and everyday.

    Please keep us all posted.

    Kind regards,


    Susan
  • Paulssister
    Paulssister Member Posts: 30

    Weight Gain
    Hi Susan,

    Plenty of good advice here from your new friends. Your brother may not feel the need for these friends yet but when the going gets rough, he may change. It would be good for him to join too as passing 2nd hand information can be difficult sometimes. You will find many answers here your doctors don't have, post away as you are going through.

    On the weight gain and more importantly diet, there are several trains of thought. Most Doctors don't believe diet has much to do with our disease nor our recovery. Nearly 'all' alternative therapists do. Doctors don't study nutrition apart from 1 day in their entire training.

    In brief, i have taken to the diet and nutrition bandwagon. The basic and total thought is that we should only be eating a plant based diet and preferably raw foods. This means fruits, vegetables, salads, nuts etc. No Animal proteins at all - including dairy. It also means eliminating all junk foods, fried foods and processed foods. You will need to do your own research on this (or your brother will) as it is a big shift in behavior. I figure we were doing something wrong to have got this disease, so by eliminating all the things that may have caused or contributed is a good idea: junk food, animal proteins, sweets and pastries, alcohol, smoking etc. It is also thought an acidic body promotes cancer while keeping your body alkaline, help prevent it. The above diet will do this by itself. You get the small litmus strips fm your drugstore and test his pee for the pH.

    I also believe that using supplements and vitamins to help us recover and rebuild our immune systems is critical. If the immune system is working properly, it should kill off all cancer cells before they can form 'foci' and get a hold. You can go to my 'Expressions' page for more information and couple of very god book references.

    We understand you must be processing a lot right now, but you will soon get a good grip on what is going on. Carry a notepad and write down questions and other bits of information and that will make the data collection and general management of this a little easier for you. I was knocked down for about 6 months total. I, like Steve, has it in the tonsil, so not as involved as your brother. As the guys above said, the last 3-4 weeks of treatment can get rough and also post treatment is very hard going and it may take a few months for him to get back into the game. Depression can be a devil at any time during treatment but most common as soon as treatment is over so just note that.

    Keep in touch and the gang will be here. Don't get yourself too stressed, just take each moment as it comes and deal with things as they crop up.

    Regds to you and your Bro.
    Scambuster

    Scambuster...
    Well, we have

    Scambuster...

    Well, we have all have heard it a million times, "You are what you eat" and most of America is proving we are not eating healthy. I would think the hardest thing to eliminate from the diet would be the dairy...and, then of course, the sweets. I have pretty much eliminately meat and fish from my diet not because of health reasons but because of the treatment to animals...however, I don't think I could ever go the Vegan route but perhaps someday. I went to your "Expressions" page and copied down the books. I would like to read up on this interesting subject.

    It's also interesting about the tonsils, when I was little, everyone had their tonsils out and then there was a shift not to do so. It seems that they have caused problems for some of the folks on this site. I wonder how many with tongue cancer still have their tonsils?

    Thank you for the tip about carrying a notebook...I will get one.

    Yes, I can imagine depression is a evil twin to this disease. I will do everything in my power to help Paul "keep his chin up" and concentrate on being cancer free.


    I have said it before and will say it again, this web site and those on it have been a God send for me. I can't even imagine how hard this would have been without all of you here to support Paul and myself. I am truly grateful.

    Again, Scambuster, thank you.

    Kind regards,

    Susan
  • Paulssister
    Paulssister Member Posts: 30
    Pam M said:

    Hi Susan
    Sorry your family's going through this. Glad you found this site. I can't tell you what a blessing the folks here have been to me (and many others). I was diagnosed with Stage 4 Base of Tongue cancer with lymph nodes involved in October. I finished my treatment in March. I did chemo and radiation - no surgery. My 6 week CAT scan showed no tumors remaining (I started with three). I'll have more detailed tests at the end of the month.

    The lack of or reduction of saliva most all of us experience is why there's concern for the teeth. Saliva helps remove the organisms from our teeth that promote decay. Since we have decreased protection, we're given other tools to help protect our teeth (special toothpastes, rinses, flouride treatments, etc.). I was also told to have my teeth cleaned every 4 months instead of 6. Most people do not go through loss of jaw bone, luckily.

    It is wonderful that you're able and willing to go to Paul to help him through this ordeal. I'm sure that will really make a difference in his treatment journey. Bless you both.

    - Pam

    Pam...
    Thank you so much for

    Pam...

    Thank you so much for the information. It is far better to know what may happened during the treatments than to go through it learning along the way. As you know, it is pretty scary and like you said, the folks on this web site are a blessing and that includes you.

    Please keep me posted on your test results. Your CAT scan is certainly exciting news!

    Kind regards,

    Susan
  • Jan Trinks
    Jan Trinks Member Posts: 477
    My Brother Paul has Cancer
    Hi Susan:

    Welcome aboard. I'm so sorry to hear about your brother. But stay positive. My husband was diagnosed with h/n cancer in Nov. 2008. Probably was Stage 4 as one lymph node was involved; but it was just located on inside below his left ear. I too was devastated. We were truly blessed to be in the area where the best of the best are. He had 3 inductive chemo treatment and 35 radiation treatments. He finished treatments April of 2009. Has been back to work a year now. It wasn't easy, but through faith, prayer and the great medical team he has and all the people here we made it through. You and your brother are in our prayers and best of luck to you both.

    Jan and Charlie Trinks
  • Jan Trinks
    Jan Trinks Member Posts: 477
    My Brother Paul has Cancer
    Hi Susan:

    Welcome aboard. I'm so sorry to hear about your brother. But stay positive. My husband was diagnosed with h/n cancer in Nov. 2008. Probably was Stage 4 as one lymph node was involved; but it was just located on inside below his left ear. I too was devastated. We were truly blessed to be in the area where the best of the best are. He had 3 inductive chemo treatment and 35 radiation treatments. He finished treatments April of 2009. Has been back to work a year now. It wasn't easy, but through faith, prayer and the great medical team he has and all the people here we made it through. You and your brother are in our prayers and best of luck to you both.

    Jan and Charlie Trinks
  • Paulssister
    Paulssister Member Posts: 30
    Greg53 said:

    Hi Susan
    Hi Susan,

    Where is your brother at in Missouri? I'm in St. Louis. If he's in this area and needs any assistance, he can email me directly or on here.

    I've read numerous books now and I'm in total agreement with Scam on the nutrition thing. Overall there are tons of great people on this site with lots of good info. I would suggest your brother sign up; it's well worth the time. I wish I had joined earlier.

    The only things I'd like to add is not to be afraid to get a second opinion. There are lots of qualified teams of physicians around. Also you can learn a lot here. Ask the doctors lots of questions and be well informed. Last, one of the biggest common denominators we all face after radiation is issues related to the destruction of salivary glands. There is a drug that has been discussed here (Amifostine??) that some have use that may limit the damage. I would ask about that? I did not know about it til too late.

    Good luck!
    Greg

    Greg...
    Paul lives in

    Greg...

    Paul lives in Independence, Missouri. I appreciate your kind offer and although not in visiting distance, you are very close because of this web site and for that I am grateful.

    I also appreciate the suggestion for a second opinion and the information about the drug. I will ask the doctor about it when I see him.

    Although he has not joined this web site yet, it is a goal of mine to have him do so. He needs to be here and see and get this information first-hand.

    Again, many thanks Greg.

    Kind regards,

    Susan
  • Paulssister
    Paulssister Member Posts: 30
    Greg53 said:

    Hi Susan
    Hi Susan,

    Where is your brother at in Missouri? I'm in St. Louis. If he's in this area and needs any assistance, he can email me directly or on here.

    I've read numerous books now and I'm in total agreement with Scam on the nutrition thing. Overall there are tons of great people on this site with lots of good info. I would suggest your brother sign up; it's well worth the time. I wish I had joined earlier.

    The only things I'd like to add is not to be afraid to get a second opinion. There are lots of qualified teams of physicians around. Also you can learn a lot here. Ask the doctors lots of questions and be well informed. Last, one of the biggest common denominators we all face after radiation is issues related to the destruction of salivary glands. There is a drug that has been discussed here (Amifostine??) that some have use that may limit the damage. I would ask about that? I did not know about it til too late.

    Good luck!
    Greg

    Greg...
    Paul lives in

    Greg...

    Paul lives in Independence, Missouri. I appreciate your kind offer and although not in visiting distance, you are very close because of this web site and for that I am grateful.

    I also appreciate the suggestion for a second opinion and the information about the drug. I will ask the doctor about it when I see him.

    Although he has not joined this web site yet, it is a goal of mine to have him do so. He needs to be here and see and get this information first-hand.

    Again, many thanks Greg.

    Kind regards,

    Susan
  • Paulssister
    Paulssister Member Posts: 30
    Greg53 said:

    Hi Susan
    Hi Susan,

    Where is your brother at in Missouri? I'm in St. Louis. If he's in this area and needs any assistance, he can email me directly or on here.

    I've read numerous books now and I'm in total agreement with Scam on the nutrition thing. Overall there are tons of great people on this site with lots of good info. I would suggest your brother sign up; it's well worth the time. I wish I had joined earlier.

    The only things I'd like to add is not to be afraid to get a second opinion. There are lots of qualified teams of physicians around. Also you can learn a lot here. Ask the doctors lots of questions and be well informed. Last, one of the biggest common denominators we all face after radiation is issues related to the destruction of salivary glands. There is a drug that has been discussed here (Amifostine??) that some have use that may limit the damage. I would ask about that? I did not know about it til too late.

    Good luck!
    Greg

    Greg...
    I have tried to post

    Greg...

    I have tried to post this reply two or three times so if you happen to received several copies, you will know why...please forgive if this does happen but for me it doesn't indicate it was posted.

    Paul lives in Independence, Missouri. I appreciate your kind offer and although not in visiting distance, you are very close because of this web site and for that I am grateful.

    I also appreciate the suggestion for a second opinion and the information about the drug. I will ask the doctor about it when I see him.

    Although he has not joined this web site yet, it is a goal of mine to have him do so. He needs to be here and see and get this information first-hand.

    Again, many thanks Greg.

    Kind regards,

    Susan
  • Paulssister
    Paulssister Member Posts: 30

    My Brother Paul has Cancer
    Hi Susan:

    Welcome aboard. I'm so sorry to hear about your brother. But stay positive. My husband was diagnosed with h/n cancer in Nov. 2008. Probably was Stage 4 as one lymph node was involved; but it was just located on inside below his left ear. I too was devastated. We were truly blessed to be in the area where the best of the best are. He had 3 inductive chemo treatment and 35 radiation treatments. He finished treatments April of 2009. Has been back to work a year now. It wasn't easy, but through faith, prayer and the great medical team he has and all the people here we made it through. You and your brother are in our prayers and best of luck to you both.

    Jan and Charlie Trinks

    Jan...
    Thank you for your

    Jan...

    Thank you for your welcome, prayers and kind words of encouragement. I do so appreciate all.

    It is certainly good news for you and your husband and I am sure he is glad to be back at work with more to concentrate on than his past two years. It is folks like you, who have taken the time to write and let me know about your experience that has given me the courage to fight this disease head-on. I look forward to looking at it in the rear view mirror.

    Again, thank you.

    God bless both.

    Kind regards,

    Susan
  • debbiejeanne
    debbiejeanne Member Posts: 3,102 Member
    Susan, I'm very sorry to
    Susan, I'm very sorry to hear of your brother's diagnosis. I had cancer of the voicebox. I am now 8 months post trmnts. I just want to welcome you and Paul to the CSN and tell you that Paul, you and your dad will be in my prayers. Paul can and WILL beat this. There are a lot of us here who have faught the battle and won, just as Paul will do. I'm also very sorry to hear about your mom, I also lost my mom to cancer (breast) and so I know what a large pill to swallow that is as well. Now, you must concentrate on Paul and help him fight this battle. It will be hard and tiring but doable. Come here often for whatever reason you need to, info, questions, to vent, encouragement, support, we are all here for you. You are now a member of our family and we will be here for you. Please keep us posted on Paul as we will be thinking of him and his family. Let him know that we are here for him.
    Good luck and hang in there Susan.
    God Bless you friend,
    debbie
  • Paulssister
    Paulssister Member Posts: 30

    Susan, I'm very sorry to
    Susan, I'm very sorry to hear of your brother's diagnosis. I had cancer of the voicebox. I am now 8 months post trmnts. I just want to welcome you and Paul to the CSN and tell you that Paul, you and your dad will be in my prayers. Paul can and WILL beat this. There are a lot of us here who have faught the battle and won, just as Paul will do. I'm also very sorry to hear about your mom, I also lost my mom to cancer (breast) and so I know what a large pill to swallow that is as well. Now, you must concentrate on Paul and help him fight this battle. It will be hard and tiring but doable. Come here often for whatever reason you need to, info, questions, to vent, encouragement, support, we are all here for you. You are now a member of our family and we will be here for you. Please keep us posted on Paul as we will be thinking of him and his family. Let him know that we are here for him.
    Good luck and hang in there Susan.
    God Bless you friend,
    debbie

    Debbie...
    Thank you for your

    Debbie...

    Thank you for your kind words and words of encouragement and support. I am currently in Independence with my brother, Paul. To date, he has been told he will have to have 6 molars removed. I think this will happen next Friday but he is checking with his doctor on Monday to make sure. Also, on Friday (if this is the day), he will have a biopsy of his tongue and have his feeding tube inserted. Fourteen days after he should begin radiation with 3 chemo treatments interspearched.

    I think it is interesting that Paul does not want to join or know what is going to happen as he feels everyone is different...which I agree however, I want to know what can happen so I will be able to face it and deal with it immediately rather than getting over the "shock" which I did have with the announcement from him that he has cancer.

    Again, Debbie, thank you. God bless you and please keep in touch.

    Kind regards,

    Susan
  • Pam M
    Pam M Member Posts: 2,196

    Debbie...
    Thank you for your

    Debbie...

    Thank you for your kind words and words of encouragement and support. I am currently in Independence with my brother, Paul. To date, he has been told he will have to have 6 molars removed. I think this will happen next Friday but he is checking with his doctor on Monday to make sure. Also, on Friday (if this is the day), he will have a biopsy of his tongue and have his feeding tube inserted. Fourteen days after he should begin radiation with 3 chemo treatments interspearched.

    I think it is interesting that Paul does not want to join or know what is going to happen as he feels everyone is different...which I agree however, I want to know what can happen so I will be able to face it and deal with it immediately rather than getting over the "shock" which I did have with the announcement from him that he has cancer.

    Again, Debbie, thank you. God bless you and please keep in touch.

    Kind regards,

    Susan

    Sometimes, Ignorance is Bliss
    Susan,

    I can understand Paul's reluctance to come here. I've been a big fan of the site ever since I stumbled upon it. My family members, and at least one of my docs are another story. A few expressed concern about me "chatting with people who might be just whiners and drama queens", and the notion that "a larger percentage of posters are people who've experienced the most difficulties with treatment". Some folks may think that reading about others' experiences may make them worry about things that might not even come to pass during their own treatment journal, so why fuel your imagination with horror stories? I read about (and worried about) some bad effects of treatment that others experienced and I (luckily) never had to go through. I am still very glad I found this site, and learned all I could from the helpful members here.
  • debbiejeanne
    debbiejeanne Member Posts: 3,102 Member

    Debbie...
    Thank you for your

    Debbie...

    Thank you for your kind words and words of encouragement and support. I am currently in Independence with my brother, Paul. To date, he has been told he will have to have 6 molars removed. I think this will happen next Friday but he is checking with his doctor on Monday to make sure. Also, on Friday (if this is the day), he will have a biopsy of his tongue and have his feeding tube inserted. Fourteen days after he should begin radiation with 3 chemo treatments interspearched.

    I think it is interesting that Paul does not want to join or know what is going to happen as he feels everyone is different...which I agree however, I want to know what can happen so I will be able to face it and deal with it immediately rather than getting over the "shock" which I did have with the announcement from him that he has cancer.

    Again, Debbie, thank you. God bless you and please keep in touch.

    Kind regards,

    Susan

    That may change as he gets
    That may change as he gets farther along with his trmnts but if it doesn', that's ok. Like you said, you will know what's going on should something come up. I wish you the best and don't be discouraged b/c he doesn't want to come here.
    God Bless you friend,
    debbie