Mother has cancer

Delight
Delight Member Posts: 5
edited March 2014 in Caregivers #1
Hello.
My name is Lori. My mother has Lymphoma and has just started her chemo. It's been a tough road and I know there are others out there that know how it is. Would love to talk and share stories.
Take care. Lori

Comments

  • rocki
    rocki Member Posts: 5
    My name is Aly. My mother started chemo on 11-19 for ovarian cancer. I live very far away, but was able be there for her surgery and first chemo. Both were awful. The cancer had spread much more than expected and they couldn't remove any, so surgery was a bust. The chemo just knocked her for a loop. She ended up back in the hospital for about a week. Now, she is losing her hair, but seems to be dealing with it as well as can be expected. She finally feels better than she has in a long time. This whole thing is so difficult. I feel like I'm on a rollercoaster blindfolded. I can only imagine what it must be like for our mothers... I have a friend going through the same thing with his mother, we spend a lot of time comparing notes. It helps to talk and share. I hope your mom is doing okay.
  • sienalax3
    sienalax3 Member Posts: 1
    My name is Melissa. My father was diagnosed with colon cancer. They thought they caught it in the nick of time, but turns out it was stage 3 colon cancer. They removed the infected area, which we were all relieved to think that the worst was over. But the pathology reports came back that his lymph nodes were now effected. So my dad starts his chem next week. Now they found that lymph nodes in another part of his body are swollen that tehy are testing on. Ive tried to be so strong for the past two months, but everyday it gets harder because every day I feel there is something new that is wrong. I would love to talk and share stories, because I just cant talk to my friends about it. I know they are there for me, but sometimes i feel they just dont understand how hurt i am. I hope to hear to talk to you soon.
  • bc99
    bc99 Member Posts: 15
    Hi Lori,

    My mother had Hodgkin's stage 4 and when through 6 months of chemo. She is 54 and has been in remission for a year, but I can remember how hard it was to be in your position. I was 26 at the time and her primary care taker, but I lived and worked 4 hours away from her. Luckily my boss let me work from home every other week so I was able to go to chemo and most of her dr's appointments with her. My friends were as supportive as they could be, but until you've experienced it, you don't know how hard it can be to go through this experience. If you ever want to talk, or even just vent, let me know and I'll give you my email!!

    Erin
  • mygen
    mygen Member Posts: 9
    sienalax3 said:

    My name is Melissa. My father was diagnosed with colon cancer. They thought they caught it in the nick of time, but turns out it was stage 3 colon cancer. They removed the infected area, which we were all relieved to think that the worst was over. But the pathology reports came back that his lymph nodes were now effected. So my dad starts his chem next week. Now they found that lymph nodes in another part of his body are swollen that tehy are testing on. Ive tried to be so strong for the past two months, but everyday it gets harder because every day I feel there is something new that is wrong. I would love to talk and share stories, because I just cant talk to my friends about it. I know they are there for me, but sometimes i feel they just dont understand how hurt i am. I hope to hear to talk to you soon.

    HI MELISSA. MY NAME IS SHANNON. MY MOTHER HAS CANCER AND HAS BEEN BATTELING IT FOR A VERY LONG TIME. I CAN TELL SHE IS IN TERRIBLE PAIN BUT STILL TRIES TO DO THINGS FOR ME AND MY CHILDREN. SHE HAS NEVER BEEN HONEST ABOUT WHAT IS GOING ON AND IT MAKES IT VERY HARD TO DEAL WITH. SOMETIMES THE NOT KNOWING CAN JUST DRIVE YOU NUTS. MY FRIENDS DON'T UNDERSTAND EITHER. WELL I SHOULDN'T SAY THEY DON'T UNDERSTAND, THEY DON'T UNDERSTAND WHY I GET SO DEPRESSED. THE THOUGHT OF LOOSING A PARENT AT MY AGE (34) IS TOO MUCH FOR ME. I'M SORRY TO HEAR ABOUT YOUR DAD. MY DAD JUST WENT THROUGH THE SAME THING WITH PROSTATE BUT ENDED UP OK AFTER SURGERY. I WANT YOU TO KNOW THAT PATHOLOGY REPORTS DON'T MEAN EVERYTHING. IF THEY DID MY MOM WOULDN'T BE HERE. THE DOCTORS HAVE ALWAYS SAID 3 MONTHS HERE, 6 MONTHS, THE TRUTH IS THEY DON'T REALLY KNOW. TRY TO BE POSITIVE AS HARD AS IT IS. MAKE EVERY MONENT COUNT. I THINK OF ALL THE WASTED TIME I ALLOWED AND IT MAKES ME SICK. I HOPE YOU HAVE GOOD NEWS BY NOW. I NOTICED THIS WAS BACK IN DECEMBER. I WOULD LIKE TO HELP IF I CAN.
  • lisanoel03
    lisanoel03 Member Posts: 5
    mygen said:

    HI MELISSA. MY NAME IS SHANNON. MY MOTHER HAS CANCER AND HAS BEEN BATTELING IT FOR A VERY LONG TIME. I CAN TELL SHE IS IN TERRIBLE PAIN BUT STILL TRIES TO DO THINGS FOR ME AND MY CHILDREN. SHE HAS NEVER BEEN HONEST ABOUT WHAT IS GOING ON AND IT MAKES IT VERY HARD TO DEAL WITH. SOMETIMES THE NOT KNOWING CAN JUST DRIVE YOU NUTS. MY FRIENDS DON'T UNDERSTAND EITHER. WELL I SHOULDN'T SAY THEY DON'T UNDERSTAND, THEY DON'T UNDERSTAND WHY I GET SO DEPRESSED. THE THOUGHT OF LOOSING A PARENT AT MY AGE (34) IS TOO MUCH FOR ME. I'M SORRY TO HEAR ABOUT YOUR DAD. MY DAD JUST WENT THROUGH THE SAME THING WITH PROSTATE BUT ENDED UP OK AFTER SURGERY. I WANT YOU TO KNOW THAT PATHOLOGY REPORTS DON'T MEAN EVERYTHING. IF THEY DID MY MOM WOULDN'T BE HERE. THE DOCTORS HAVE ALWAYS SAID 3 MONTHS HERE, 6 MONTHS, THE TRUTH IS THEY DON'T REALLY KNOW. TRY TO BE POSITIVE AS HARD AS IT IS. MAKE EVERY MONENT COUNT. I THINK OF ALL THE WASTED TIME I ALLOWED AND IT MAKES ME SICK. I HOPE YOU HAVE GOOD NEWS BY NOW. I NOTICED THIS WAS BACK IN DECEMBER. I WOULD LIKE TO HELP IF I CAN.

    Shannon~
    I just wanted to let you know that I TRULY understand what you are going through. My mom is currently fighting her second battle with cancer but I honestly can not be 100% sure what type of cancer it is. She never complains or lets us know how she's really feeling. She still tries to do so much for me and my kids. It is super scary to think of loosing her as she is my best friend and I don't know what I'd do without her let alone having my kids not remember her (they are only 1 & 2years old.)

    My prayers are with everyone dealing with cancer in their family!

    Lisa
  • clisa
    clisa Member Posts: 1
    Hi Lori, I am so sorry to hear about your mom. My sister and i are going thru a similar situation. Mom was diag 5 yrs ago w/breast cancer. It was treated w/lumpectomy and local radionation. And she as been fine since. Last month she had a cold that would not go away, her primary doc. diag as Bronchitus. She progressed to a sever shortness of breath and she went to the Emergency room on 4/4. Diagnosed with fluid in her lungs and congestive heart failure w/fluid around her heart. Fluid was decreased w/iv lasic and they found that her heart was functioning fine. Thru an xray they found noduls in her lung. This has tested positive thru biopsy for breast cancer. In adition thru a Bone scan she has extensive cancer in her ribs in her back and her 10th vertebrae is effected. This has been a total shock to our family. The cancer in her lungs is acting like pnemonia and branching out into her broncial tubes and making breating difficult. She is on full time oxygen now. They have started her on iv chemo and pill form 2x's a day to try to ger her lung function back to some degree. I can only hope and pray that she will continue to be pain free during this trip. My mom is only 61 and i am 36 w/a 31 year old sister. I just don't know how to feel right now. I just want to be strong for my mom and do all that i can for her.
    Best of wishes to all. I am happy to find this site to talk and express my feelings to other going thru the same
  • jilljordan
    jilljordan Member Posts: 1
    Dear Lori , Hi my mother had cancer too . She may have it again . She had radiation to get rid of the cancer , but shes had to undergo several other surgeries since ( including : colostomy , urostomy and she lost a kidney ) . She now has an ulcer that is producing discharge , she is very weak and cannot keep food down . Her Dr. said even if it is cancer again , theres not anything they can do . I hate seeing her so sick , I have 2 children 10 & 12 . I am almost 40 , my father died 20 yrs ago from his second battle with cancer.
  • riddleret01
    riddleret01 Member Posts: 2
    My mother has been fighting cancer for 13 years now. We has had its joyous times(when it goes into remission etc.) But with the good come the bad. With my mother we have come to the realization now that its only a matter of time. And not alot of it. Her biggest fear is leaving us girls and hurting us, or missing out on something special with the grandkids. I have learned that as hard as it is to let her go, I need to reassure her that its ok. Love your mom and tell her that everyday. Let her know what she has done for you and how greatful you are. With cancer each day is a gift from god and you need to treasure it because you never know when it will be gone forever.
  • dupton
    dupton Member Posts: 1
    Hello everyone-I just found this site-hoping it will help. My Mom 83 had cervical cancer about 2 years and had surgery and radiation. We just found out it has spread to her liver-lymph and maybe stomach.They want to start a round of chemo to see if it's possible to get it into remission which might give her more time-if not they said she wouldn't see another Christmas. Kind of hard to get into the spirit! I just wonder the wisdom and or pro's and con's of her going thru chemo at her age. Surgery is not an option. Also-if she decides to try chemo-is there anything anyone can share to make it easier-music-dvd's or whatever to help her get thru it. We know nothing of what to expect-how long it takes etc??? She watched her sister die of liver cancer so knows it will not be easy-any help would be appreciated!