Need advice on husbands symptoms

Hi, was wondering if anyone can give advice on my husbands symptoms. He just told me tonight that he hasbeenbleeding from his rectum. Says more blood comes out than feces. I'm shocked that he hasn't told me before. Said he's been hiding the towels. Huey's before having a bowel movement. Had polyps removed at 50. Clear colonoscopy at 53. Is now 57. Said he's not going to the doctor .  Help, I don't know how to convince him to go. It could be something simple I hope.

Comments

  • lp1964
    lp1964 Member Posts: 1,239 Member
    Does not sound good.

    He has to the doctor ASAP. No discussion!!!

     

  • Gbfedna
    Gbfedna Member Posts: 3
    lp1964 said:

    Does not sound good.

    He has to the doctor ASAP. No discussion!!!

     

    sticky situation

    I know! it sounds  horrible. I would be to the doctor pronto.....I have one more problem. He told me I cant tell anyone. We have 4 children. 2 his, 2 mine. they are all grown, in their 20's. His 2 children lost their mom unexpectedly when they were 9 and 11. I cant even imagine their reaction if he lets this go and finds out it was cancer and then really bad. Also, if they realize I knew about it the entire time and didnt say anything? so now Im stuck, do I keep his confidence or tell at least his daughter? I dont know what to do, call his doctor myself and make him an appointment? part of me feels like thats why he finally told me, he really wants me to but says he doesnt?? any thoughts would be appreciated.

  • tanstaafl
    tanstaafl Member Posts: 1,313 Member

    On hour 1, I read 4-5 "Cancer", surgery and "colorectal cancer" articles at Lef.org, as if my wife's life before surgery depended on it.  Although we go beyond some of LEF's recommendations, we both think her life was greatly changed for the better, starting there.   PSK, cimetidine, vitamin D3, quercetin are important low cost parts in the mix.    

    Although she was stage IV with several sites and distant mets,  she's done very, very well without the normal chemo sickness burden.  Day 1 is the day to add LEF style CAM results.  We use generic supplements and drugs with a nice daily chemo.

  • lp1964
    lp1964 Member Posts: 1,239 Member
    Gbfedna said:

    sticky situation

    I know! it sounds  horrible. I would be to the doctor pronto.....I have one more problem. He told me I cant tell anyone. We have 4 children. 2 his, 2 mine. they are all grown, in their 20's. His 2 children lost their mom unexpectedly when they were 9 and 11. I cant even imagine their reaction if he lets this go and finds out it was cancer and then really bad. Also, if they realize I knew about it the entire time and didnt say anything? so now Im stuck, do I keep his confidence or tell at least his daughter? I dont know what to do, call his doctor myself and make him an appointment? part of me feels like thats why he finally told me, he really wants me to but says he doesnt?? any thoughts would be appreciated.

    Most men...

    ...has this approach. I did too. Yes, make an appointment and tell him "Honey, let's go!" Once you guys know what it is you can plan the strategy for treatment. And I suggest to talk to the family once you have a plan.

    I wish you the best possible outcome.

    Laz

  • Trubrit
    Trubrit Member Posts: 5,796 Member
    Not always cancer

    My huband bleeds allot every now and again. He has had a colonoscopy and has bad internal hemerrhroids that bleed.  So, tell your husband its not always cancer.

    Either way though, he needs to get to the Doctor and find out.  

  • Sandi1
    Sandi1 Member Posts: 277
    Hemorroids?

    could just be hemorroids, but could be something else.  My husband also hid it from me and by the time i convinced him to go to the doctor he was already stage 4 - which means it had spread around his body.  He has been having chemo for the last 5 years.  It is not a fun thing to go through.  So i would just gently talk to him and tell him that you would feel so much better if he would just go and see what it is.  He is obviously looking for help that he told you, or he would not have bothered to tell you.  I know it's hard, but sometimes if gently talking doesn't work, tough love has to be given.


    If you need to talk you can send me a private message.

     

    Good Luck

    My husband was 46 when he was diagnosed, still around and still fighting.

  • Sandi1
    Sandi1 Member Posts: 277
    Hemorroids?

    could just be hemorroids, but could be something else.  My husband also hid it from me and by the time i convinced him to go to the doctor he was already stage 4 - which means it had spread around his body.  He has been having chemo for the last 5 years.  It is not a fun thing to go through.  So i would just gently talk to him and tell him that you would feel so much better if he would just go and see what it is.  He is obviously looking for help that he told you, or he would not have bothered to tell you.  I know it's hard, but sometimes if gently talking doesn't work, tough love has to be given.


    If you need to talk you can send me a private message.

     

    Good Luck

    My husband was 46 when he was diagnosed, still around and still fighting.

  • Gbfedna
    Gbfedna Member Posts: 3
    Sandi1 said:

    Hemorroids?

    could just be hemorroids, but could be something else.  My husband also hid it from me and by the time i convinced him to go to the doctor he was already stage 4 - which means it had spread around his body.  He has been having chemo for the last 5 years.  It is not a fun thing to go through.  So i would just gently talk to him and tell him that you would feel so much better if he would just go and see what it is.  He is obviously looking for help that he told you, or he would not have bothered to tell you.  I know it's hard, but sometimes if gently talking doesn't work, tough love has to be given.


    If you need to talk you can send me a private message.

     

    Good Luck

    My husband was 46 when he was diagnosed, still around and still fighting.

    Thanks

    Thank you all. I too think its just bad hemorrhoids but would like to be sure. I will definitely try to get him to go. Will keep you all posted. He retires tomorrow so will have plenty of time for a check up.

  • Annabelle41415
    Annabelle41415 Member Posts: 6,742 Member
    Colonoscopy

    You should make sure that your husband get's scheduled for a colonscopy and that will tell a lot of what is going on.  Hope it is nothing, but don't let him say that he's not going to do anything about it be the final say.  He needs to have something done to find out what is happening.  Please keep us informed about how he is doing.

    Kim

  • Deena11
    Deena11 Member Posts: 199 Member
    Doctor

    He does need to go to the doctor.  May only be hemorroids so he needs to find out to ease his mind.

    Deena

  • steveandnat
    steveandnat Member Posts: 886
    You and your husband both know

    Going to the dr and finding out what is causing the bleeding is the only good answer. Like everyone is saying it could be a noncancerous problem.  Maybe look on the Internet at other causes of rectum bleeding.  The sooner the better because if cancer is involved the sooner it's detected the chances it hasn'tspreading is better.  Jeff