My Cherokee Irishman Has Gone Home

wolfen
wolfen Member Posts: 1,324 Member

All My Friends,

With the help of the wonderful Hospice group, my Ron was transported to our home Saturday at 2:30 PM. Robert & I rode with him. It was expected that he would expire shortly afterward. However, he managed to hang on until 9:10 AM Sunday. There was no struggle, only my own. He woke as the vent was removed, opened his eyes & said "I am alive". But it was not to be. He returned to sleep immediately and was kept comfortable until his tired body said it was time to go. I believe he knew that we had brought him home. We played his favorite John Wayne movies, held his hands tightly, & talked to him all night. JBG woke & came into the room & cried saying "Please God, why don't you take him home." Ten minutes later he took his final breath. As I am not a person of strong faith as she is, it is very hard to wrap my mind around this, but she & Ron had a special bond, so who am I to question what happened?

I am numb. I know many of you have been here before and in time, we will get through this. I removed every nasty reminder of this terrible illness from my sight. I could not stand to look at all the meds & equipment. I'm hoping they'll get it out of my house tomorrow.

Even though I thought I knew this man so well, I did not realize he had had been saving small amounts of money to help us after he was gone, enough to put a down payment on his funeral. I found it with a small card I had purchased in the hospital gift shop & given to him him after he became so ill six months ago. I would like to share with you the words on this card:  I love you as you are. I love you as you will be. I love you because there's this little part of me(my heart)...that tells me that you and I were simply and always meant to be.

I cried when I found this card, for you see, that is what each of us felt for the other. I am proud to have been his wife for forty one years and he will always be in my heart.

Luv,

Wolfen



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Comments

  • yensid683
    yensid683 Member Posts: 349
    condolences and prayers

    No one should ever have to go through what you and your family have.  It is just not fair.

    My wife and I have followed your journey and now are both saddened at your loss, and happy for your husband that his long suffering is over.  May you and your children find solace in one another over the next few difficult days

    We're here for you whenever you need us

  • Ladylacy
    Ladylacy Member Posts: 773 Member
    Your Husband

    Karen, as I read your message my heart is breaking for you and yours.  All I can say is that I hope and pray that I can be as strong as you, Vivian and others on this site, when it comes to my husband and letting him go.

    God Bless you and your family.

    Sharon

  • Threelittlebirds
    Threelittlebirds Member Posts: 39
    Me deepest condolences

    I am so sorry for your loss.  I truly hope he is in a much better place and is no free of any pain.

  • Duggie88
    Duggie88 Member Posts: 760 Member

    Although he had to make the journey God chose, you gave him the send off he wanted. Words can never take away the hurt and sorrow but friends can soften the blow. From what I see you have plenty of friends here to lean on.

    Thoughts and Prayers

          Jeff

  • Grandmax4
    Grandmax4 Member Posts: 723
    There are no

    words, to express the sympathy, I feel for you and your family~~may peace be with you

  • Skiffin16
    Skiffin16 Member Posts: 8,305 Member
    Sorrow, Transition & Celebration...

    Dearest Wolfen, I'm sorry for the loss of your husband, until you are joined again...

    I can only think of it as sorrow, for your immediate loss, transition for you and of the return of your husband to earth and his cherokee forefathers, and celebration of his life with you, his diginity and thoughtfulness for you and family & the forty plus years of memories that you will always have..

    John

  • michdjp
    michdjp Member Posts: 220
    Truly sorry

    My family and I are truly sorry for your loss your post was both sorrowful and beautiful at the same time.  You were blessed to have had such a love in your life.  

    With my sincerest condolences

    michelle

  • VivianLee5689
    VivianLee5689 Member Posts: 546
    michdjp said:

    Truly sorry

    My family and I are truly sorry for your loss your post was both sorrowful and beautiful at the same time.  You were blessed to have had such a love in your life.  

    With my sincerest condolences

    michelle

    I am touched by your post

    Karen, I am so very sorry you lost the man you loved so well for so long.  I understand how you feel about getting the hospital things out of the house. It took almost three weeks to get the hospital bed out and every time I'd go in the family room I would break down. I really do want you to call if you need or want and sympathetic ear.  I can't make you feel no pain, but I am a good listener. 

  • MarineE5
    MarineE5 Member Posts: 1,030 Member
    My Thoughts and Prayers

    Wolfen,

    No words that I type here today will ease the pain you feel. But hopefully, as time passes, so does the pain and only fond memories remain.

  • katenorwood
    katenorwood Member Posts: 1,912
    My thoughts are with you

    Karen,

    May you find comfort in the arms of your family and they in yours.  You are a wonder, and my heart holds you near.  Katie

  • rachel12yrsuv
    rachel12yrsuv Member Posts: 435
    I couldn't be more sorry

    Karen,

     

    I so hoped Ron will pull through, and even though my head told me differently, my heart wanted it so bad.  With David and now your sweet Ron, who would've thought that the passing of two men I never meant would hurt so bad that it brings me to tears.  You were such a brave supporter of your Hero fighter, Ron.  All he wanted to do was come home even if it meant passing there, and you made sure that his final wish was made, and that his by means of that card, made sure you never once question who you were to him and how you made him happy.  It his parting note he left you one less thing to worry about financially and a sweet discription of your life together that you can hold to.  Some people think what mark have I left in this world, you left an indelable mark on the heart of your sweet Ron and he on yours.

    Karen I am so sad, I cant think of anything else to say besides I love you and I am here for you if you should ever need me.

    RIP Sweet Ron, I hope you are resting on an Angels wing right next to David!

     

    God be with you and your family and may He wrap His mericful arms around you and bring you comfrot in this time of grief. Amen

     

    Rachel
     

  • Patti1967
    Patti1967 Member Posts: 186

    I couldn't be more sorry

    Karen,

     

    I so hoped Ron will pull through, and even though my head told me differently, my heart wanted it so bad.  With David and now your sweet Ron, who would've thought that the passing of two men I never meant would hurt so bad that it brings me to tears.  You were such a brave supporter of your Hero fighter, Ron.  All he wanted to do was come home even if it meant passing there, and you made sure that his final wish was made, and that his by means of that card, made sure you never once question who you were to him and how you made him happy.  It his parting note he left you one less thing to worry about financially and a sweet discription of your life together that you can hold to.  Some people think what mark have I left in this world, you left an indelable mark on the heart of your sweet Ron and he on yours.

    Karen I am so sad, I cant think of anything else to say besides I love you and I am here for you if you should ever need me.

    RIP Sweet Ron, I hope you are resting on an Angels wing right next to David!

     

    God be with you and your family and may He wrap His mericful arms around you and bring you comfrot in this time of grief. Amen

     

    Rachel
     

    Wolfen, I am so very sorry

    Wolfen, I am so very sorry for your loss.  Prayers to you and your family.

    Patti

  • phrannie51
    phrannie51 Member Posts: 4,716
    My heart is aching for you

    Karen.  The card was so touching, I sat here reading and choked up.....what a dear sweet thing to do....the man of few words left some pretty profound ones.  For Ron I am relieved that his suffering has come to an end....for you I can only reach out and tell you how much I admire the strength, humor, dignity....and class you have shown thru this long hard journey. 

    My heart felt sympathy goes out to you and your family.

    p

  • ditto1
    ditto1 Member Posts: 660

    My heart is aching for you

    Karen.  The card was so touching, I sat here reading and choked up.....what a dear sweet thing to do....the man of few words left some pretty profound ones.  For Ron I am relieved that his suffering has come to an end....for you I can only reach out and tell you how much I admire the strength, humor, dignity....and class you have shown thru this long hard journey. 

    My heart felt sympathy goes out to you and your family.

    p

    May he rest in peace

    Diane and I want you to know we care and our sympathy for your loss.  God Bless you and your Family.

  • CivilMatt
    CivilMatt Member Posts: 4,722 Member
    peace

     

    Wolfen,

     

    I am deeply saddened by your loss and touched by this final story.  Please, accept my heartfelt condolences.

     

    Yours truly,

     

    Matt

     

  • GavinP
    GavinP Member Posts: 118
    ditto1 said:

    May he rest in peace

    Diane and I want you to know we care and our sympathy for your loss.  God Bless you and your Family.

    I'm so sorry...

    I'm so sorry for your loss.   My deepest sympathies.

  • MICH4EL
    MICH4EL Member Posts: 73
    Your loss

    I am very sorry for your loss.  I am glad you were able to be with him, at home, at the end. 

    M

  • hwt
    hwt Member Posts: 2,328 Member
    MICH4EL said:

    Your loss

    I am very sorry for your loss.  I am glad you were able to be with him, at home, at the end. 

    M

    Sympathy

    My prayers are with you and your family. 

    God Bless,

    Candi

  • fishmanpa
    fishmanpa Member Posts: 1,227 Member
    Condolences

    Wolfen,

    My condolences on your loss. Blessings in that it seems it was peaceful and he knew he was loved.

    "T"

  • D Lewis
    D Lewis Member Posts: 1,581 Member
    My condolences

    So very sorry for your great loss. Find solace in your forty one years of happy memories.

    Deb