Is extending life always the best choice

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Comments

  • ralph.townsend1
    ralph.townsend1 Member Posts: 359 Member

    Not Necessarily Messy
    When I was first diagnosed with PCa I wanted to put off being treated for as long as I could and knew I was taking a risk. I have already gained 12 years of not being incontinent or impotent so I figure I won a partial victory. I made up my mind if the PCa did catch up with me I was not going to die a long drawn out death. I have seen several of my friends and relatives die and if I can do anything to keep from going that way I will. I may have to check out of the net a bit early but I will go on my terms. Having said that, guns don't have to be messy. A quiet place on a beach at low tide and by high tide no more mess. Guns have the highest success rate.

    Hope
    That great, 12 years! Do not take anything i say personal. I'm almost 62 and to many drugs. I totally understand your thinking.

    Have a great Christmas and a Happy New Year.
  • SeattleJ
    SeattleJ Member Posts: 32

    Not Messy?
    Guess you've never seen the results of a suicide by gun.

    I have and they are almost always very messy. Some messier than others. You can increase the possibility of a "neat" crime scene by using a 22LR bullet but that also increases the risk of a failed attempt.

    Frankly, if you need to "check out", the BEST method is currently to sign up with an established euthanasia organization in Europe (I posted the links to them above) who will arrange for the administration of a cocktail of totally drugs under the direction of a doctor that are guaranteed to cause you to fall asleep painlessly w/o any possibility of waking back up.

    That'll be my choice if it ever comes down to that.

    WA & OR
    Washington and Oregon also have "Death with Dignity" laws that allow assisted suicide. I believe that you must have a terminal illness in both states and have it certified by physicians, but is another option for those in that situation.

    These are tough personal choices that hopefully we won't have to make, but having the option can bring peace even if it is not used. That has happened several times since the WA law passed. A person is certified but never carries it out. It just gives them peace that they can make the decision if they wish. Control over your own life is important too.

    John
  • Alexandra
    Alexandra Member Posts: 1,308

    Not Necessarily Messy
    When I was first diagnosed with PCa I wanted to put off being treated for as long as I could and knew I was taking a risk. I have already gained 12 years of not being incontinent or impotent so I figure I won a partial victory. I made up my mind if the PCa did catch up with me I was not going to die a long drawn out death. I have seen several of my friends and relatives die and if I can do anything to keep from going that way I will. I may have to check out of the net a bit early but I will go on my terms. Having said that, guns don't have to be messy. A quiet place on a beach at low tide and by high tide no more mess. Guns have the highest success rate.

    Euthanasia vs. Suicide

    I have been thinking about the subject for 8 months since I was diagnosed with advanced ovarian cancer.

    I am not religious and I support the right to end terminally ill person's life by suicide or euthanasia when there is no hope and quality of life is unacceptable.

    I am neither depressed nor suicidal and I don't need referrals to suicide hotlines or bible references.

    I will fight the disease for as long as it makes sense to me.

    I don't want the mess or emotional trauma to the loved ones.

    I live in Canada where help with euthanasia is a criminal offence punishable by up to 14 years in jail. We also have much stricter gun laws than in USA.

    The best ideas I found came from http://ash2.wikkii.com/wiki/Main_Page and boil down to the over-the-counter drug cocktails with anti-nausea drugs or inert (welding) gases.

     

    Happy and healthy New Year to you all

  • cchqnetman
    cchqnetman Member Posts: 119
    Alexandra said:

    Euthanasia vs. Suicide

    I have been thinking about the subject for 8 months since I was diagnosed with advanced ovarian cancer.

    I am not religious and I support the right to end terminally ill person's life by suicide or euthanasia when there is no hope and quality of life is unacceptable.

    I am neither depressed nor suicidal and I don't need referrals to suicide hotlines or bible references.

    I will fight the disease for as long as it makes sense to me.

    I don't want the mess or emotional trauma to the loved ones.

    I live in Canada where help with euthanasia is a criminal offence punishable by up to 14 years in jail. We also have much stricter gun laws than in USA.

    The best ideas I found came from http://ash2.wikkii.com/wiki/Main_Page and boil down to the over-the-counter drug cocktails with anti-nausea drugs or inert (welding) gases.

     

    Happy and healthy New Year to you all

    Are you sure we are not related??

    Alexandra,

    I loved you comment "I am not religious and I support the right to end terminally ill person's life by suicide or euthanasia when there is no hope and quality of life is unacceptable." I couldn't have said it better. I kind of agree with your statement, "I am neither depressed nor suicidal and I don't need referrals to suicide hotlines or bible references.” I have always been depressed for as long as I can remember but I don't think I am suicidal. I will be when my life gets to a point that it is totally not worth living. I am not terribly concerned with legality - are they going to arrest me if I commit suicide. Good luck. I am not a gun fanatic but I have a 9mm Berretta and a couple 12 gauge shotguns. If I continue on with Active Surveillance I will do it until it is painful. At that point I will probably check out of the net.

    I hope you have a good life for as long as you want to it last.

    Happy New Year and best wishes in all your choices.

    David

  • hopeful and optimistic
    hopeful and optimistic Member Posts: 2,339 Member

    Are you sure we are not related??

    Alexandra,

    I loved you comment "I am not religious and I support the right to end terminally ill person's life by suicide or euthanasia when there is no hope and quality of life is unacceptable." I couldn't have said it better. I kind of agree with your statement, "I am neither depressed nor suicidal and I don't need referrals to suicide hotlines or bible references.” I have always been depressed for as long as I can remember but I don't think I am suicidal. I will be when my life gets to a point that it is totally not worth living. I am not terribly concerned with legality - are they going to arrest me if I commit suicide. Good luck. I am not a gun fanatic but I have a 9mm Berretta and a couple 12 gauge shotguns. If I continue on with Active Surveillance I will do it until it is painful. At that point I will probably check out of the net.

    I hope you have a good life for as long as you want to it last.

    Happy New Year and best wishes in all your choices.

    David

    Dear David,

    I do not understand the logic of part of your post, since Active Surveillance is short for " Active Surveillance with delayed treatment, if necessary".

    Your new diagnostic test indicated that you now require Active Treatment, so if you continue with what you interpret as Active Surveillance, you are not getting the treatment that you require, and there would be consequences based on this action.

    So instead of getting the treatment that you currently need, and go on with your life,  you instead would rather be non compliant and "will do it until it is painful. At that point I will probably check out of the net."

     

  • cchqnetman
    cchqnetman Member Posts: 119

    Dear David,

    I do not understand the logic of part of your post, since Active Surveillance is short for " Active Surveillance with delayed treatment, if necessary".

    Your new diagnostic test indicated that you now require Active Treatment, so if you continue with what you interpret as Active Surveillance, you are not getting the treatment that you require, and there would be consequences based on this action.

    So instead of getting the treatment that you currently need, and go on with your life,  you instead would rather be non compliant and "will do it until it is painful. At that point I will probably check out of the net."

     

    Active Surveilance on my terms

    Hopeful,

    There are many "standards" for Active Surveillance as there are for so many things in PCa world. My goal is to delay treatment as long as I can and right now I am not convinced I have to have treatment. I may at some time decide I have to and would probably chose brachytherapy. I should have said I will do AS until I have to have treatment. My definition of "have to" may be different from someone else's definition of "have to". If I ever get to the point where it is painful I will probably check out of the net. I am not going to lessen an already less than optimal quality of life just to extend it.

    Wishing you all the best in your treatment selections.

    Happy New Year!!!

    David

  • ralph.townsend1
    ralph.townsend1 Member Posts: 359 Member

    Active Surveilance on my terms

    Hopeful,

    There are many "standards" for Active Surveillance as there are for so many things in PCa world. My goal is to delay treatment as long as I can and right now I am not convinced I have to have treatment. I may at some time decide I have to and would probably chose brachytherapy. I should have said I will do AS until I have to have treatment. My definition of "have to" may be different from someone else's definition of "have to". If I ever get to the point where it is painful I will probably check out of the net. I am not going to lessen an already less than optimal quality of life just to extend it.

    Wishing you all the best in your treatment selections.

    Happy New Year!!!

    David

    Standards

    David, I feel so lost in my world and should tell you that I try not to think like you, but I'm fighting the same battles you have. As a Vietnam veteran I should have died there. I have been sick since the the 1970 and did not know how to deal with it and fighting the demon's. I was a great little child and the War took that away, I try to be a better person, but sometimes the darkiness take over.

    Happy New Years

  • cchqnetman
    cchqnetman Member Posts: 119

    Standards

    David, I feel so lost in my world and should tell you that I try not to think like you, but I'm fighting the same battles you have. As a Vietnam veteran I should have died there. I have been sick since the the 1970 and did not know how to deal with it and fighting the demon's. I was a great little child and the War took that away, I try to be a better person, but sometimes the darkiness take over.

    Happy New Years

    Darkness = 50 pound weight

    Ralph,

    I think your darkness is my 50 pound weight.  Sometimes I feel like there is a 50 pound weight sitting on my chest.  Not heart problems, just the way my depression feels.  I guess everyone has their own description but no one has a cure.  I am not going to take drugs or become an alcoholic so I just deal with it the best I can.  Still haven't decided what to do about the PCa.  I talk to my doc next week and a radiation oncologist the week after.  Docs don't usually have good news.  I don't have any symptoms yet and it is still T1C so I am pretty much sure I am going to stay on AS for a while.  I can't make up my mind on a treatment plan so I guess doing nothing is better than doing something and having it be the wrong choice.

    Hope everyone's 2013 is a better year.

    David

     

  • califvader
    califvader Member Posts: 108
    My Philosophy

     cure what you can and endure what you can't.  that's how i feel.

  • halfwayhome
    halfwayhome Member Posts: 9

    My Philosophy

     cure what you can and endure what you can't.  that's how i feel.

    quality of life
    This is an objective term. What brings you joy? Family? Friends? If you don't have this what about volunteering for something you feel strongly about? Find the joy in your life. This won't make all your problems go away but it will make you feel better for whatever time you have or choose to have left. Some will say this is silly. I challenge them to help a fellow pc patient that doesn't have a ride get to a doctors appointment. Tutor a struggling student that has never known his dad. Find the things that bring you joy. Helping where and when you can will bring joy and meaning to your life while your still here. To big to tackle? Try doing RAK for the rest of of the time your here. Random acts of kindness. Hold a door for somebody. Make somebody who is down smile or laugh with a joke or by being goofy. Try it with a complete stranger.
    I hope this post will help in some small way. I know it's helped me to try and encourage someone else.and yes I am a fellow Pc patient.
  • halfwayhome
    halfwayhome Member Posts: 9

    My Philosophy

     cure what you can and endure what you can't.  that's how i feel.

    quality of life
    This is an objective term. What brings you joy? Family? Friends? If you don't have this what about volunteering for something you feel strongly about? Find the joy in your life. This won't make all your problems go away but it will make you feel better for whatever time you have or choose to have left. Some will say this is silly. I challenge them to help a fellow pc patient that doesn't have a ride get to a doctors appointment. Tutor a struggling student that has never known his dad. Find the things that bring you joy. Helping where and when you can will bring joy and meaning to your life while your still here. To big to tackle? Try doing RAK for the rest of of the time your here. Random acts of kindness. Hold a door for somebody. Make somebody who is down smile or laugh with a joke or by being goofy. Try it with a complete stranger.
    I hope this post will help in some small way. I know it's helped me to try and encourage someone else.and yes I am a fellow Pc patient.
  • SCHRCH
    SCHRCH Member Posts: 18

    quality of life
    This is an objective term. What brings you joy? Family? Friends? If you don't have this what about volunteering for something you feel strongly about? Find the joy in your life. This won't make all your problems go away but it will make you feel better for whatever time you have or choose to have left. Some will say this is silly. I challenge them to help a fellow pc patient that doesn't have a ride get to a doctors appointment. Tutor a struggling student that has never known his dad. Find the things that bring you joy. Helping where and when you can will bring joy and meaning to your life while your still here. To big to tackle? Try doing RAK for the rest of of the time your here. Random acts of kindness. Hold a door for somebody. Make somebody who is down smile or laugh with a joke or by being goofy. Try it with a complete stranger.
    I hope this post will help in some small way. I know it's helped me to try and encourage someone else.and yes I am a fellow Pc patient.

    quality of life

    First let me say that I judge no one --- that is God and God alone's decision.  I am a Christian and I do believe in Jesus.  I do believe in Heaven and Hell.  Having said that, I will pray for you even if you do not have the same beliefs that I do.  I will pray that God will supernaturally show Himself to you in a way that will be undeniable.  I believe that life is a gift -- every day, every breath is a gift.  Some suffer more than others and no one can ever know God's reasoning or timing.  But please consider your family when making this decision.  I know that may seem unfair but I would take into consideration my husband and children before I considered something so permanent and destructive to the loved ones left behind.  I can't know your pain and I'm sure there are plenty out there who wish the pain would go away so badly that they think along the lines as you.  I agree that you should seek counseling.  If not with Clergy -- then with a professional.  Depression is just as much a monster as cancer and any other life changing disease.  I've know those who have pulled out of it and I've know those who have not and the loved ones are left to grieve and hurt and there's absolutely nothing anyone can do to help them.  Again, I pray for you and your family and I hope you truly consider everything and everyone who will be affected by your decision.  God Bless....... 

  • jwoodie
    jwoodie Member Posts: 21
    Quality of Life

    I view life as a march to the grave, a journey I gladly take for future generations.  Having passed the Bilical three score, quality of life and dying with dignity mean much to me than seeing how long I can evade the Grim Reaper.  Families are usually the impediment here, because death is more diificult for the survivors to accept.  Personally, I would happily trade 10 bad years for five good ones.  Although it is still early in my diagnosis, my greatest wish is for a graceful exit, whenever that may be.

  • mimbyus
    mimbyus Member Posts: 18

    Hello cchqnetman:

    I am thinkinig seriouslsy along the same lines as you: I believe Life is for Living, not Suffering.

    I'm 58 yrs old, recently diagnosed with PCa, a-symptomatic, Gleason 3+4=7, PSA 11, with a doc pushing for  "retropubic" or "suprapubic" prostectomy.

    I have serious prior conditions that already reduce my Quality of Life to "Just Barely Worth It." I fear that the  prostectomy will exacerbate my prior conditions, thereby only adding to my daily suffering, and ultimately tipping the scales further to "Not Worth Living." 

    Here is my story in detail, already related in another area on this site: CONSIDERING NO TREATMENT

    And here is the address to my blog on one of my serious prior conditions: nothingyoucansee.com. My major concern is my dignity: I don't think I could ever bear incontinence and impotence.

    I am not a religious person, so self-extinction, or  refusal to be treated ( and to have palliative care when needed ) causes me no moral dilemma.

    It doesn't help that eveywhere a person turns for advice about PCa, you get conflicting "facts" and opinions. Look, I'm an educated person, holding a Masters degree, and I am retired on disability from a spectacular career as a news reporter. So I know how to research! Even so, my investigative research skills aren't producing any answers. Just total frustation.

    If the medical community is  confused and can't come to agreement on what is best for PCa victims, then they should STOP experimenting on us!

    And so, i am considering NO treatment, and likely a shortened life if my PCa metastasizes. I have been reassured by one doctor that palliative care could keep me comfortable, in the event of outbreak of my presently encapsulated cancer.

    So my PCa kills me at age 65. SO F****G WHAT! At least I will have lived my final days in dignity, without Depends, catheters and urine bags, and never having had sexual function. 

    This pathology is truly a B***h. But I refuse to run scared, and scarred (by horrendous surgeries done to me). F**K THAT!

    One commenter [below] raises the issue of suicide as a crime against morality, because it visits insult and injury to those loved ones you leave behind. I've been suicidal once, and made a serious attempt [read about this incident at my blog, link above]. Yes, suicide does hurt others. After my attempt, I took much grief and anger from family and friends. But most family and friends then just left me! So if there is to be a second round, I'll have no moral qualms. SCREW everbody who only thought of their own hurt feelings at a time when I desperately needed support. Your life belongs to YOU. You don't owe anybody your survival when you Can't Get No Satisfaction!

    Thanks for bravely raising this controversial topic. You did the right thing.

    I wish you Peace, man.

     

    W.T.

  • mimbyus
    mimbyus Member Posts: 18
    SCHRCH said:

    quality of life

    First let me say that I judge no one --- that is God and God alone's decision.  I am a Christian and I do believe in Jesus.  I do believe in Heaven and Hell.  Having said that, I will pray for you even if you do not have the same beliefs that I do.  I will pray that God will supernaturally show Himself to you in a way that will be undeniable.  I believe that life is a gift -- every day, every breath is a gift.  Some suffer more than others and no one can ever know God's reasoning or timing.  But please consider your family when making this decision.  I know that may seem unfair but I would take into consideration my husband and children before I considered something so permanent and destructive to the loved ones left behind.  I can't know your pain and I'm sure there are plenty out there who wish the pain would go away so badly that they think along the lines as you.  I agree that you should seek counseling.  If not with Clergy -- then with a professional.  Depression is just as much a monster as cancer and any other life changing disease.  I've know those who have pulled out of it and I've know those who have not and the loved ones are left to grieve and hurt and there's absolutely nothing anyone can do to help them.  Again, I pray for you and your family and I hope you truly consider everything and everyone who will be affected by your decision.  God Bless....... 

    Hello SCHRCH:

     

    I'm not David, the originator of this string, but if I had received your reply - as another non-religious man - i would have taken insult! I'm sorry to say it, but it's the truth. WHY must so many religious people proselytize and insist upon applying their own private values to others? You go right ahead and believe in fairy tales ( jesus, God) but keep it to yourself, please. I'm not interested. You're not being helpful, except to your own ego needs.

     

    A fallen hero of mine penned a verse on this topic: "God is a concept by which we measure our pain."....John Lennon.

     

    I notice frequently that persons who fall ill, or who fall into trouble with the law and become incarcerated ...SUDDENLY FIND JESUS!!! What A Surprise! ......"God IS a concept.".....in other words a mental construct we human beings tend to create in our minds, just like fairy godmothers, who serve to make us feel better...because we will be "saved" from our pains.

     

    In regards to your advice to David against suicide or euthanasia: "please consider your family when making this decision," I've been there and done that...I endured much guilt about the pain I caused family and friends after my suicide attempt..but it got me exactly NOWHERE on the scales of morality. I got a kick in the butt instead! Family and friends only thought of themselves, forgetting that I was the person in the mix who was in desperate psychic pain! Please see my post about this experience elsewhere on this site, lower on this present page: re: extending the quality but lowering the quality of life.

    I myself am in the same boat with David. My quality of life can only go from bad to worse, with this visitation of PCa. I say: "Life is for LIVING, not SUFFERING."

    "Hey, You, Get off of my cloud!"

    Peace, baby.

     

    W.T.

     

  • shipjim
    shipjim Member Posts: 137 Member
    mimbyus said:

    Hello cchqnetman:

    I am thinkinig seriouslsy along the same lines as you: I believe Life is for Living, not Suffering.

    I'm 58 yrs old, recently diagnosed with PCa, a-symptomatic, Gleason 3+4=7, PSA 11, with a doc pushing for  "retropubic" or "suprapubic" prostectomy.

    I have serious prior conditions that already reduce my Quality of Life to "Just Barely Worth It." I fear that the  prostectomy will exacerbate my prior conditions, thereby only adding to my daily suffering, and ultimately tipping the scales further to "Not Worth Living." 

    Here is my story in detail, already related in another area on this site: CONSIDERING NO TREATMENT

    And here is the address to my blog on one of my serious prior conditions: nothingyoucansee.com. My major concern is my dignity: I don't think I could ever bear incontinence and impotence.

    I am not a religious person, so self-extinction, or  refusal to be treated ( and to have palliative care when needed ) causes me no moral dilemma.

    It doesn't help that eveywhere a person turns for advice about PCa, you get conflicting "facts" and opinions. Look, I'm an educated person, holding a Masters degree, and I am retired on disability from a spectacular career as a news reporter. So I know how to research! Even so, my investigative research skills aren't producing any answers. Just total frustation.

    If the medical community is  confused and can't come to agreement on what is best for PCa victims, then they should STOP experimenting on us!

    And so, i am considering NO treatment, and likely a shortened life if my PCa metastasizes. I have been reassured by one doctor that palliative care could keep me comfortable, in the event of outbreak of my presently encapsulated cancer.

    So my PCa kills me at age 65. SO F****G WHAT! At least I will have lived my final days in dignity, without Depends, catheters and urine bags, and never having had sexual function. 

    This pathology is truly a B***h. But I refuse to run scared, and scarred (by horrendous surgeries done to me). F**K THAT!

    One commenter [below] raises the issue of suicide as a crime against morality, because it visits insult and injury to those loved ones you leave behind. I've been suicidal once, and made a serious attempt [read about this incident at my blog, link above]. Yes, suicide does hurt others. After my attempt, I took much grief and anger from family and friends. But most family and friends then just left me! So if there is to be a second round, I'll have no moral qualms. SCREW everbody who only thought of their own hurt feelings at a time when I desperately needed support. Your life belongs to YOU. You don't owe anybody your survival when you Can't Get No Satisfaction!

    Thanks for bravely raising this controversial topic. You did the right thing.

    I wish you Peace, man.

     

    W.T.

    the big I's

    I'm impotent and have mild inconntinence.  They don't kill you and they don't hurt.  Don't have sex but am not with out love and human contact with my wife.  The inconntinence on my part is leakage which i handle with pads.  Some days are worse than others but I'm not drowning, play golf, with my grandkids we boat play ball and hang out.  I have allowed no restrictions on my life.

    .

  • shipjim
    shipjim Member Posts: 137 Member
    mimbyus said:

    Hello cchqnetman:

    I am thinkinig seriouslsy along the same lines as you: I believe Life is for Living, not Suffering.

    I'm 58 yrs old, recently diagnosed with PCa, a-symptomatic, Gleason 3+4=7, PSA 11, with a doc pushing for  "retropubic" or "suprapubic" prostectomy.

    I have serious prior conditions that already reduce my Quality of Life to "Just Barely Worth It." I fear that the  prostectomy will exacerbate my prior conditions, thereby only adding to my daily suffering, and ultimately tipping the scales further to "Not Worth Living." 

    Here is my story in detail, already related in another area on this site: CONSIDERING NO TREATMENT

    And here is the address to my blog on one of my serious prior conditions: nothingyoucansee.com. My major concern is my dignity: I don't think I could ever bear incontinence and impotence.

    I am not a religious person, so self-extinction, or  refusal to be treated ( and to have palliative care when needed ) causes me no moral dilemma.

    It doesn't help that eveywhere a person turns for advice about PCa, you get conflicting "facts" and opinions. Look, I'm an educated person, holding a Masters degree, and I am retired on disability from a spectacular career as a news reporter. So I know how to research! Even so, my investigative research skills aren't producing any answers. Just total frustation.

    If the medical community is  confused and can't come to agreement on what is best for PCa victims, then they should STOP experimenting on us!

    And so, i am considering NO treatment, and likely a shortened life if my PCa metastasizes. I have been reassured by one doctor that palliative care could keep me comfortable, in the event of outbreak of my presently encapsulated cancer.

    So my PCa kills me at age 65. SO F****G WHAT! At least I will have lived my final days in dignity, without Depends, catheters and urine bags, and never having had sexual function. 

    This pathology is truly a B***h. But I refuse to run scared, and scarred (by horrendous surgeries done to me). F**K THAT!

    One commenter [below] raises the issue of suicide as a crime against morality, because it visits insult and injury to those loved ones you leave behind. I've been suicidal once, and made a serious attempt [read about this incident at my blog, link above]. Yes, suicide does hurt others. After my attempt, I took much grief and anger from family and friends. But most family and friends then just left me! So if there is to be a second round, I'll have no moral qualms. SCREW everbody who only thought of their own hurt feelings at a time when I desperately needed support. Your life belongs to YOU. You don't owe anybody your survival when you Can't Get No Satisfaction!

    Thanks for bravely raising this controversial topic. You did the right thing.

    I wish you Peace, man.

     

    W.T.

    the big I's

    I'm impotent and have mild inconntinence.  They don't kill you and they don't hurt.  Don't have sex but am not with out love and human contact with my wife.  The inconntinence on my part is leakage which i handle with pads.  Some days are worse than others but I'm not drowning, play golf, with my grandkids we boat play ball and hang out.  I have allowed no restrictions on my life.

    .

  • Eric65
    Eric65 Member Posts: 125 Member
    mimbyus said:

    Hello cchqnetman:

    I am thinkinig seriouslsy along the same lines as you: I believe Life is for Living, not Suffering.

    I'm 58 yrs old, recently diagnosed with PCa, a-symptomatic, Gleason 3+4=7, PSA 11, with a doc pushing for  "retropubic" or "suprapubic" prostectomy.

    I have serious prior conditions that already reduce my Quality of Life to "Just Barely Worth It." I fear that the  prostectomy will exacerbate my prior conditions, thereby only adding to my daily suffering, and ultimately tipping the scales further to "Not Worth Living." 

    Here is my story in detail, already related in another area on this site: CONSIDERING NO TREATMENT

    And here is the address to my blog on one of my serious prior conditions: nothingyoucansee.com. My major concern is my dignity: I don't think I could ever bear incontinence and impotence.

    I am not a religious person, so self-extinction, or  refusal to be treated ( and to have palliative care when needed ) causes me no moral dilemma.

    It doesn't help that eveywhere a person turns for advice about PCa, you get conflicting "facts" and opinions. Look, I'm an educated person, holding a Masters degree, and I am retired on disability from a spectacular career as a news reporter. So I know how to research! Even so, my investigative research skills aren't producing any answers. Just total frustation.

    If the medical community is  confused and can't come to agreement on what is best for PCa victims, then they should STOP experimenting on us!

    And so, i am considering NO treatment, and likely a shortened life if my PCa metastasizes. I have been reassured by one doctor that palliative care could keep me comfortable, in the event of outbreak of my presently encapsulated cancer.

    So my PCa kills me at age 65. SO F****G WHAT! At least I will have lived my final days in dignity, without Depends, catheters and urine bags, and never having had sexual function. 

    This pathology is truly a B***h. But I refuse to run scared, and scarred (by horrendous surgeries done to me). F**K THAT!

    One commenter [below] raises the issue of suicide as a crime against morality, because it visits insult and injury to those loved ones you leave behind. I've been suicidal once, and made a serious attempt [read about this incident at my blog, link above]. Yes, suicide does hurt others. After my attempt, I took much grief and anger from family and friends. But most family and friends then just left me! So if there is to be a second round, I'll have no moral qualms. SCREW everbody who only thought of their own hurt feelings at a time when I desperately needed support. Your life belongs to YOU. You don't owe anybody your survival when you Can't Get No Satisfaction!

    Thanks for bravely raising this controversial topic. You did the right thing.

    I wish you Peace, man.

     

    W.T.

    Do not blame you dude

    Just try to picture constant pain that does not respond to medicine and to that, add being alone and surrounded by idiots at the same time (oh it's possible) if you try and let someone in they have selfish motivations. I've tried everything, sometimes there's really no other choice. I will find the courage.