Some colonoscopy humor....

Is there anything humorous about colonoscopies. Just a little. I had my second one since diagonsis. Had it done in Colorado, was glad I didn't have to fly to Houston for that one. Former MD Anderson colleague of my doctors did it. Last time I was out cold. This time he tells me I'll be awake. I'm like "Are you crazy? I don't want to see this stuff"! He laughs and says "keep your eyes closed and don't worry you won't feel anything". Okay so I keep my eyes closed. For 10 seconds. Then I'm watching the whole thing on the screen. I'm a little loopy but I remember everything. He tells me "Your colon looks young and beautiful". I say " Can you make the rest of me look that way?" He says "Well you need a different doctor for that". Then I'm questioning every spot on the screen. "What's that" Is that cancer". He says "I thought you didn't want to look at it". I say, "I changed my mind". He laughs and sweetly answers my questions. Then I ask him, "Can you do me a favor and on the way out make a pit stop where my tumor was". He's still laughing but says sure. So then we get into a conversation about the "spot". Of course I want to know if he sees any cancer there. He says no, nothing but scar tissue and some fibrosis. Loopy Liz then wants an explanation of fibrosis which he provides. We finish, they roll me out to the recovery area. I'm starving, they say wait, I say no. I tell my husband to go find me a muffin. lol I don't know where that request came from but I was craving a muffin. They tell me to eat it slow, I eat the whole thing. Doctor comes by with the report to discuss with my husband and I and says to my husband, "She can tell you everything that's on the report since we discussed it fully during the procedure" and he smiles. I'm still a little loopy so I ask the doctor if he wants some of my muffin? lol. He politely declines and then just looks at me and said it was a very interesting colonoscopy. I'll see you in 5 years or so!