THE ONCOLOGIST SAYS NO MORE CHEMO

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bawa
bawa Member Posts: 39
Hi All

The dilemma is increasing and the oncologist from Stanford has refused chemo for my sister, 33, with EC stage four. Now we really do not know where to go from here...whether to take a second opinion, what shall we do? She was ready to give chemo ten days back and today even when her vitals were matching the standards of chemo she decided not to go ahead with chemo. It has disappointed my sister who was keen to go ahead with it...alas!

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  • forme
    forme Member Posts: 1,161 Member
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    Hospice
    Hi Bawa

    I don't post much to this board, but do read often.
    I replied to your post titled "Caregiver dilemma-to cry or not to cry" about Hospice for your dear sister.

    Maybe you have read it already, but in case you missed it, I want you to know about a wonderful hospice in your area.
    Our family has used them for two family members. For my mother in law last year and then for my dear mom this year. Although we did use them for mom before this year.

    The hospice is so caring and helpful. If anyone in my family ever needs hospice again, they will be the ones I call. There are many other hospice in the bay area, but I truly believe that this is one of the best, in my opinion, the Best!.

    Please feel free to PM me if you have any questions about our experience with hospice. Im happy to talk with you any time.

    Your sister is always free to have a second opinion, but it can only help her and all of you to have hospice on board now. So many folks wait till the very end to bring hospice in. They are ready and able to help now.

    My mom was in their hospice for almost two years, but then got so much better she no longer needed them. Then this year we new it was time to call them again, and they were with my mom and all of us till her last breath.

    Prayers for your sister and all of you,
    Lisha


    The hospice is: VITAS Innovative Hospice care of california 1-866-418-4827
    They also have a website.
  • unclaw2002
    unclaw2002 Member Posts: 599
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    forme said:

    Hospice
    Hi Bawa

    I don't post much to this board, but do read often.
    I replied to your post titled "Caregiver dilemma-to cry or not to cry" about Hospice for your dear sister.

    Maybe you have read it already, but in case you missed it, I want you to know about a wonderful hospice in your area.
    Our family has used them for two family members. For my mother in law last year and then for my dear mom this year. Although we did use them for mom before this year.

    The hospice is so caring and helpful. If anyone in my family ever needs hospice again, they will be the ones I call. There are many other hospice in the bay area, but I truly believe that this is one of the best, in my opinion, the Best!.

    Please feel free to PM me if you have any questions about our experience with hospice. Im happy to talk with you any time.

    Your sister is always free to have a second opinion, but it can only help her and all of you to have hospice on board now. So many folks wait till the very end to bring hospice in. They are ready and able to help now.

    My mom was in their hospice for almost two years, but then got so much better she no longer needed them. Then this year we new it was time to call them again, and they were with my mom and all of us till her last breath.

    Prayers for your sister and all of you,
    Lisha


    The hospice is: VITAS Innovative Hospice care of california 1-866-418-4827
    They also have a website.

    We used VITAS in Pittsburgh
    We used VITAS in Pittsburgh and they were amazing as well. Also, you might want to take a look at an article on our new site from the Mayo Clinic it may give you some helpful background - http://www.esophagealcancerfighters.com/?page_id=41 "When enough is enough - Stoping Cancer Treatment when the time is right" - it really talks about the process of deciding on treatment and what to do if you want to stop treatment and your doctor doesn't or if you want to continue treatment and your doctor doesn't. There are also some links to the NIH and clinical trials. Good luck - 33 is so young my heart breaks for your sister and your entire family.

    Cindy
  • jaycc
    jaycc Member Posts: 122
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    A patients right
    Your at a tough roller-coaster point in stage IV and chemo.
    Just my opinion,
    If fighting is what your sister really wants to do at this point, it should be the patient's decision to continue chemo. What the doctor is saying is the doctor won't continue chemo. I'm not familiar with Sanford, but first you might want to try where you are. questions below, actually demand it. Also not sure what your history is with radiation. As you can see on this board some doctors are doing all chemo stage 4, some all radiation, some a mix.
    Sorry don't remember does your sister have a J-tube yet?

    The doctor won't like it but ask:
    -to talk with the doctor's boss/head
    -talk to the radiotologist directly
    -Ask them, then where/who else should we go immediately to continue treatment options.
    -there are dose levels for chemo, have you discussed low dose option

    I also found bringing in another person with the doctors from family or friends at these conversations is really helpful. Your heart is breaking and it can be hard to keep a clear head, and nice to have another listening as well.