Hi friends, both new and old

Daisylin
Daisylin Member Posts: 365
Hi to all..... I have been away from these boards for a few months, although I occasionally take a moment to catch up on how everyone is. I have shed endless tears and celebrated tremendous victories with so many of you.

I am so sad to see so many new names and stories. I am finding it increasingly hard to visit this place, as the constant reminders of the pain and suffering can be overwhelming. Since Lee passed in November, it's been a whirlwind of emotion. I've just recently passed from the denial and total numbness phase to the intense grief phase, making it so much harder to participate here. I do plan to continue to visit the boards, and please know that I am thinking of all of you, even if I may not have the strength to reply to your posts.

I continue to visit the facebook group as well, and some of us widows (what a miserable word that is) have formed a separate group where we focus on healing and positive ways to keep one foot in front of the other, as we mourn our losses. I am so grateful to this site for providing me with these wonderful ladies. It has been a true blessing for me to meet so many fantastic friends, who know exactly what I'm going through.

I wish you all well, as you battle the beast. I pray that there will be many more victories to come! I raise a glass to all of you, caregivers, survivors and friends who will look the dragon in the eye......

be well my friends,
Chantal
wife of Lee, deceased Nov 8, 2011

Comments

  • TerryV
    TerryV Member Posts: 887
    Wonderful to "see" you!
    Chantal,

    How nice to see your post! You "sound" well. I've been wondering how you are doing.

    I'm glad that you are interacting with others that have lost their spouse to this damned cancer. The encouragement and "one foot in front of the other" that you can bring to each other is wonderful sharing.

    Please know that you are seldom far from our thoughts.

    With much love and many, many {hugs}

    Terry
  • Heeran
    Heeran Member Posts: 171
    hi
    Hi Chantal,
    Good to see you on the board. I know what you mean about it being difficult to come back to this site. I have difficulty as well. I feel anxiety stricken sometimes and am grieving my mom while she is alive, I can only imagine it's 100 times worse for you. Hang in there. Not really sure when the broken heart feeling gets better but I hope you see more and more glimpses of it soon. Take care.
  • JimboC
    JimboC Member Posts: 264
    Hi Chantal,
    Always good to

    Hi Chantal,

    Always good to hear from you. I follow you on FB. I still think of Lee and all the others we've lost and draw strength from their memories to continue my fight. When the fight gets tough (and when isn't it?) I just hunker down and dig in. This past week was especially tough so I needed a lot of strength.

    It feels like we've lost so many of our friends and comrades in arms in the past six months. It seems like more than ever but I'm sure it isn't. The loss of our friends is just so tough. Even online friends feel like livelong friends considering what we've all shared and been through here.

    I think the group for the widows (and I agree with your description) is a great idea. Many of us are way too young to have to even think of this but I think no matter what age it's just as tough.

    Take care my friend!

    JimboC
  • Ginny_B
    Ginny_B Member Posts: 532
    Chantal, you are a bright
    Chantal, you are a bright light!
  • mardigras
    mardigras Member Posts: 215 Member
    Hello Chantal
    How lovely of you to think of us all and send your good wishes.
    We all know how difficult it must be for you to post here and
    thank you from the bottom of our hearts for all the love and
    support you have shown to us all.
    You and your precious Lee will always be in our hearts and we
    all wish you peace and love as you continue on with your journey.
    God Bless you Chantal.
    Prayers and hugs,
    Marci x
  • stephikindred
    stephikindred Member Posts: 140
    Hi Chantal
    I'm so sorry for the loss of your husband. It is difficult to visit this site sometimes as we fall in love with everyone and it can be hard to read updates when the news is not good. It is doubly hard to know what to say at times. I'm glad you stopped by and just wanted to say hi and send my condolences to you.
    Hugs, Steph
  • birdiequeen
    birdiequeen Member Posts: 319
    Dear sweet Chantal,
    So gald

    Dear sweet Chantal,

    So gald to hear from you. We do understand this can be a very difficult place to visit. Follow your heart in healing.

    Lee Ann
  • JReed
    JReed Member Posts: 428
    I will have a glass lifting with you
    Hi Chantal:

    Everyone has said what I would want to say to you. I especially love Lee Ann's advice - follow your heart in healing. You have been so helpful to us and we appreciate so much what you and Lee continue to do for us.

    I wish I could put my energy to good use as you have done - but I just feel like my a$% and legs are in cement most days. Sunshine days seems to be the best!

    Hugs and FEC,
    Judy
  • Ginny_B
    Ginny_B Member Posts: 532
    JReed said:

    I will have a glass lifting with you
    Hi Chantal:

    Everyone has said what I would want to say to you. I especially love Lee Ann's advice - follow your heart in healing. You have been so helpful to us and we appreciate so much what you and Lee continue to do for us.

    I wish I could put my energy to good use as you have done - but I just feel like my a$% and legs are in cement most days. Sunshine days seems to be the best!

    Hugs and FEC,
    Judy

    Judy dear, all your energy
    Judy dear, all your energy is focused on Don right now. That's ok. The energy that comes later is emotional energy, I think. I can't stop. Gotta keep doing something. Clean. Organize. Throw-away. Just keep busy busy busy. Keeping busy helps keep emotions at bay, I think. Right now your energy is right where it should be. Hugs!