I can't stand being fat

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Comments

  • new2me
    new2me Member Posts: 177 Member

    My advice--hope this helps
    I had gained some extra pounds back in 2000. I lost weight first by cutting portion size and eating many less calories. I did not exercise at all at first, because I was feeling a little down and self-conscious (stupid, I know). After I lost weight, my energy picked way up and I began to move more and lost a little more and toned up.

    So my advice is always to eat less first. Although it helps, you do not have to exercise to lose weight.

    Start small--just begin to cut portion size first and substitute healthy foods for unhealthy ones. Keep a food journal.

    We avoid fast food like the plague. Fast food=densely caloric food that rarely satisfies for long. And when we do eat out, we split food. Portion sizes are so grossly distorted these days that one "meal" is the equivalent to about 3 healthy meals.

    Do not diet--it will make you crazy. Just begin to cut back a little at a time. Food can definitely be an addiction, but, of course, we can't "give it up" like alcohol or tobacco. So try and wean yourself a little at a time. As you gain confidence, it will become easier.

    And your ultimate goal is health not weight loss. So do get out and walk, move, hit the gym or whatever works, because exercise has so many, many great health benefits.

    Me too me too!!
    I can relate to everyone of you !! I'm struggling too - gain 20 lbs. I bought a treadmill last week hoping it will help and give me an incentive. so far this last week, I am averaging over 500 calories a day burn. It really makes me think before i eat that chocolate (my weakness). I try to hit the gym 3 times a week for the aerobic classes. but still - my fat is stubborn and isn't making this easy.
    I do not suggest you cook 2 seperate meals - thats too hard (on you) red meat isn;t that good for us anyway - maybe he should cut back right along with you. My husband does most of the cooking and we eat very healthy now - alot chicken, brown rice, veggies. My dr. told me to try to cut all sugars out of my diet - that is ssooo hard.
    anyway, I know i'm all over the place here - but looks like the weight gain of typical for the most of us. I also believe that becasue I put on weight I didn't get sick during chemo.
    Hang in there - we are all in this together...

    Kelly
  • sausageroll
    sausageroll Member Posts: 415
    new2me said:

    Me too me too!!
    I can relate to everyone of you !! I'm struggling too - gain 20 lbs. I bought a treadmill last week hoping it will help and give me an incentive. so far this last week, I am averaging over 500 calories a day burn. It really makes me think before i eat that chocolate (my weakness). I try to hit the gym 3 times a week for the aerobic classes. but still - my fat is stubborn and isn't making this easy.
    I do not suggest you cook 2 seperate meals - thats too hard (on you) red meat isn;t that good for us anyway - maybe he should cut back right along with you. My husband does most of the cooking and we eat very healthy now - alot chicken, brown rice, veggies. My dr. told me to try to cut all sugars out of my diet - that is ssooo hard.
    anyway, I know i'm all over the place here - but looks like the weight gain of typical for the most of us. I also believe that becasue I put on weight I didn't get sick during chemo.
    Hang in there - we are all in this together...

    Kelly

    So good!
    Isn't it good to hear that you are not the only one? I so relate to what you are all saying. I lost 35lbs during chemo...but it is all back on and gaining. Some parts of my body are O.K. but I have developed this enormous belly and jowls too. My hair has started to come out again and I look years older. We are about to go on vacation and we went shopping yesterday for some clothes. I happened to see myself in the mirror as we left and just knew I would not be buying anything. I don't even feel like dressing up anymore. Yes, I know I am very lucky...but wish I could just look a little better.
    I'm thinking that this is just a passing phase for most of us and we will find a way to deal with it as we have other things in this fight.
    Take care all and know you are not alone. Pat
  • mschwibi
    mschwibi Member Posts: 9
    jo jo said:

    Im so glad im not the only
    Im so glad im not the only one dealing with this...i have gained so much weight since chemo and still gaining...im like that pilsbury dough boy...just roll me in flour and call me done!!!
    I to have always been thin and now im a house. It use to be if i was outside on a windy day i would get blown away if i didnt hang on to something but now if im outside and the wind blows i can fly using my layers of flab for wings.

    lol
    U R just too funny! I love your attitude. :-)
  • mschwibi
    mschwibi Member Posts: 9

    So good!
    Isn't it good to hear that you are not the only one? I so relate to what you are all saying. I lost 35lbs during chemo...but it is all back on and gaining. Some parts of my body are O.K. but I have developed this enormous belly and jowls too. My hair has started to come out again and I look years older. We are about to go on vacation and we went shopping yesterday for some clothes. I happened to see myself in the mirror as we left and just knew I would not be buying anything. I don't even feel like dressing up anymore. Yes, I know I am very lucky...but wish I could just look a little better.
    I'm thinking that this is just a passing phase for most of us and we will find a way to deal with it as we have other things in this fight.
    Take care all and know you are not alone. Pat

    We are in the same boat. I
    We are in the same boat. I will say that when I have to look nice and my clothes that used to fit me and make me feel good don't fit anymore, I go to one of those "big girl" shops and that can usually help me feel a little better. Just a thought.

    I'm hearing most everyone say eat a little less, but don't strict diet.
    Move a little more, but don't feel like I have to enlist a fitness instructor just now.

    Last night I went for a walk with a neighbor. In that hour we both burned some steam. IT was good. I could probably enjoy doing that more often.

    Thanks all.
  • CypressCynthia
    CypressCynthia Member Posts: 4,014 Member
    mschwibi said:

    We are in the same boat. I
    We are in the same boat. I will say that when I have to look nice and my clothes that used to fit me and make me feel good don't fit anymore, I go to one of those "big girl" shops and that can usually help me feel a little better. Just a thought.

    I'm hearing most everyone say eat a little less, but don't strict diet.
    Move a little more, but don't feel like I have to enlist a fitness instructor just now.

    Last night I went for a walk with a neighbor. In that hour we both burned some steam. IT was good. I could probably enjoy doing that more often.

    Thanks all.

    We are all in the same boat
    We are all in the same boat and your post kicked my butt into doing a longer walk this am. I think that it is awesome that you walked last night! Don't deprive just make little changes wherever you can. And I'll try to take my own advice ;-)
  • natly15
    natly15 Member Posts: 1,941
    Oh how I identify. I lost
    Oh how I identify. I lost and gained the same 5 pounds all thru chemo. I was overweight before I was diagnosed and have struggled with weight all my life. I dont like being heavy and my Onc doesnt like it either, however it is so important to accept ourselves and love ourselves fat or thin. I had to get comfortable in my skin and I'm carrying way too much, but I must remember that I am way more than my body. It seems to be such a struggle for most women and as we age it becomes evern more difficult to take off those pounds. Be gentle with your self. You have been thru a lot and I will remind myself to do the same.
  • dbhadra
    dbhadra Member Posts: 344 Member
    natly15 said:

    Oh how I identify. I lost
    Oh how I identify. I lost and gained the same 5 pounds all thru chemo. I was overweight before I was diagnosed and have struggled with weight all my life. I dont like being heavy and my Onc doesnt like it either, however it is so important to accept ourselves and love ourselves fat or thin. I had to get comfortable in my skin and I'm carrying way too much, but I must remember that I am way more than my body. It seems to be such a struggle for most women and as we age it becomes evern more difficult to take off those pounds. Be gentle with your self. You have been thru a lot and I will remind myself to do the same.

    can so identify!!
    I lost 25 pounds last year...weight has been a struggle my entire adult life...after dx lost a bit more due to stress...now, eating like crazy with steriods and chemo and stress...gained back 5-10 (fluctuates every day it seems!!!!)

    I try to walk, and do yoga once a week..I know I need to control my portion sizes but right now feels like one more thing to deal with...I used to do Calorie Count and log everything I ate...and that really helped....but can;t deal with it right now..so doing the best I can and trying not to beat myself up about the weight....

    and agree..what is this with "you look great" - my hair is falling out, I have bald patches on top and I;m fat!!!! "you look great" meaning, great for someone who has cancer and chemo - I know people are being nice and I do appreciate it but honestly, I don;t think I look "great" right now, sorry!

    Laura
  • aysemari
    aysemari Member Posts: 1,596 Member
    Sometimes
    I want to literally SCREAM if one more person tells me you look great.
    Sure they mean well, but I know I gained thirty pounds and don't fit in
    my clothes. I have been reluctant to buy chubby-flage clothes but I
    realize I need something to make me feel better about myself and tie
    me over, till I loose the weight. My frustration really built, when I was
    too darn exhausted to do anything towards the end of chemo... At the
    beginning I worked out at home on my Nordic track. I nearly lost it
    when I couldn't anymore.

    When I look in the mirror I am in disbelief that this is my reflection.
    As a former pilates instructor, I was very trim and toned, never had
    a belly in my life and now I have this pooch. But I am back at the gym
    and take long hikes on weekends.. pOOooch be GONE! I want my sexy back.

    Hugs,
    Ayse
  • Reikigemgirl
    Reikigemgirl Member Posts: 278
    Aremidix is making me gain weight.
    My oncologist warned me that I would gain weight while taking Aremidix sp? for the next 5 years but I had no idea it would be this much. I am hungry all the time. Lost 25 lbs. during chemo and have gained it all back, plus some.

    I am in a study for a new kind of breast reconstruction; fat grafting. They have to do liposuction to get the fact to inject into your breast so I will be having it done on my chin and my belly. I am going to post all about it as I go along. Right now the Brava machine is being ordered. It's like a suction cup device that is attached over the breast area where I had my masectomy. It works to stretch the skin out and make a pocket in there where they can inject the fat from your own body into it. It takes from 1 to 4 grafts, depending on how big you want your breast to be. By the time it is done, I just might have a whole new body. After I recover from the surgery, I am joining a Zumba class. It's like salsa dancing and is supposed to really get you in shape.

    Are any of you taking Aremidix? That could be the culprit. My body image is very poor right now and I don't really like my fiance to see me without a big t-shirt on to hide the fat. He has never said anything but he knows that it bothers me. Was always very petite. Still only 5'2" but I weigh 174. Can't wait for this extra weight to be gone!!!
  • 24242
    24242 Member Posts: 1,398
    I gained 70 lbs
    I am not sure your age but I was diagnosed and treated at age 37 so menopause set in and I actually quit smoking though an athlete my entire smoking life. When I lost my knees I took up body building and hard work so my weight problems had subsided until on all kinds of meds after treatments. I had tossed the healthy life style to the curb since it didn't keep me from the cancer journey but managed to quit smoking knowing it was sucking the life out of me, I coud feel it. I gave myself a life present and quit though my partner continued to.
    I tipped 200 after almost two years of the inablily to work or work out since being so ill. I finally got fed up as you sound and got back to walking then some yoga and then pretty soon I had the energy to get back to work and soon back to living a life.
    Yes much medication was taken for a few years but today I am not on anything coping with problem areas fairly well but not eager to get back on something since fear of side effects plague me.
    Try and remember that muscles never forget and actually for those of us who actually did exercise at some point in our lives, it only takes a month to get them kicked into gear and not so stressed because they have that memory stored. After seeing what yoga did for Madonna you would be amazed how much the simplest of moves can do for you. I just did from a book but cd's are the craze and they work. Oh yes and many short videos on youtube a great place to begin. Anything you want to know can be found there, lolol it is true.
    Now I am 50 years old and actually in better shape than ever in my young life. I work harder than I have ever worked and work out when I am not working. I truly believe my bodies strength has this interesting ability to give me hope and courage knowing I have made it through it all. positive thinking helps too lolol
    Tara
  • Kristin N
    Kristin N Member Posts: 1,968 Member
    jphilpo said:

    weight
    I so can feel your pain!! After all the treatments, I have gained about 30 pounds!! I don't know what to think!! I am anemic also, which is hard because all I want to do is rest after work.. I force myself to take a walk and try to do some weights, but it's so hard. I cried all the way to work today. I don't recognize myself or know what to do.

    Jean

    All I can add is to give
    All I can add is to give yourself time. Look at what you have been thru. Hoping you lose the weight easily.
  • mimivac
    mimivac Member Posts: 2,143
    As you can see, many of us
    As you can see, many of us can understand how you feel. The frustration, self disgust, and the feeling that the person staring back at you in the mirror is someone else -- someone you don't really like! Your body has been put through a heck of a lot and for many of us, weight gain is the response. I am going to give you some unconventional advice: stop trying to lose weight. There is a statistic that 95% of people who go on diets will gain the weight back, plus more. As a culture, we have dieted our way to obesity. First, be kinder to yourself (not easy!). Your body is what got you through treatment, what has sustained you through the most difficult times of your life. Don't tell it that it's ugly and disgusting. Feed yourself when you feel hungry because you deserve to be feed food that you like and that satisfies you. I think one of the keys to a healthy weight is to eat when your body requires it and not when it doesn't. Easily said, but very hard to make the distinction after years of depriving yourself and then overindulging to make up for it.

    Next, look at exercise as a source to feel good and not to lose weight. Your body deserves to move in pleasurable ways. I am still struggling with finding these ways for myself, but I will get there. Unlinking eating and exercise from weight will take a lot of pressure off and allow you to really listen to your body. I recommend a book called "Intuitive Eating" that explains a lot of these concepts. I can actually enjoy food now and my emotional eating is at a minimum. Best of all, I obsess a lot less about food and weight than I used to. Anyway, just another opinion. Good luck!

    Edited to add: I totally understand that a lot of our problems stem from treatment and not overeating. I still think the principles can apply though.

    Mimi
  • cinnamonsmile
    cinnamonsmile Member Posts: 1,187 Member
    me too
    i have been very overweight for years, a size 18 on a 5'4 body,in 2009 i was severely mentally ill and lost just about 30 and went down to almost a size 14. i gained a little back over the summer. but man have i packed on the pounds since my lumpectomy in nov and now mastectomy 1/11/11even more. i have small legs and butt, but man, i have one of those bellys that i have seen on women that i swore id never have when i was younger...the kind that looks like a frontal butt, sags, and makes me have a very unfeminine figure.since mastecomy, i have not been able to wash alone yet (although i am making progress) and it was so hard at first to have my boyfriend (who is wonderful) see me naked without breasts but with that giant belly.it was like having larger D cup size breasts made up or somehow compensated in my mind for the big belly.now i have no breasts but have the big belly. i still get uncomfortable when he watches me have to lift up the fat and wash and dry underneathe. dont get me wrong, i know its my fault that i am this way.i guess i have a weird distorted body image, i somehow, think i dont look that bad like i look how i did years ago until i look in mirror, shower with help from bf or see myself in pictures.recently carrots were on sale so we got me some of those and eat a salad everyday, i eat canned fruit in 100% juices,i stopped having him buy me chips, i eat popcron in the air popper,i have grapefruit to eat for breakfast and i still gained two pounds in the last few weeks!but i am determined to keep going. we sort of live in the country and today was beautiful weather and i was able to take my dog for a 20 minute walk today! a few weeks ago, i could walk out to get the mail, i figure any walking i can do, do it.not easy to do in a ce ntral wisconsin winter when i have to be careful of falling on ice. my goal is to have a flat stomach some day so a. i can wear pretty tank tops with my almost flat chest and no big belly sticking out with shorts and b. wear a pretty lacey kind of sexy but tasteful nightie and surprise my bf.i wish of all us whatever we need, whatever size we are that we are uncomfortable the strength, stamina and will power and luck maybe to either change the way we are or come to terms with ourselves if for some reason we cant. thank you ladies, you are all wonderful!
    ps i forgot to leave out that my latest weight gains 1 lb per week has been from an inability to do much more than sit after postlumpectomy heading into postmastectomy/snb problems.